Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Guest_1055]

Thankyou Grandy for asking me if I was ok. Just letting you know I am safe.

[demonblaster]

Hi darlin 👩‍❤️‍👩 was trying to reply to you last night and the tablet drained battery again think something else us wrong too so I'll try let you know with the ph if its down.

Just waiting on a lift to Mr 😍 place he has a doc appt tomoz so we staying over.

Love you wrapping up for the gorgeous furs. Don't at all love you being alone tho huns.

Hey girls I know you'd keep an eye out but please be careful with the snakes. Yikes Grandz could they be in your grass you mow. Maybe keep your mobile handy on you but just don't get bitten my lovely please. I worry about you beautiful 💜

Love your cow story with the oh der cologne (can't think how to spell it so went phonetic ... all English should be I reckon it's so much more logical and easier)

Sorry hun its been a while here. You know your always in my thoughts don't you and 👀 here 😚

Hope the cows come back to visit you. Glad you have them Pawsy to watch they are nice calm creatures, don't seem to bother anyone or animal. Just cruisin along.

Love you Mrs beautiful. You're a beautiful friend to many. Thank you lovely one 🤗

Hope you're doing ok Grandy love 💗🗯💜👩‍❤️‍👩💜🤝🕊

[Ggrand]

Hello Hanna, Paws,cShelly, Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩...🤗..

Shelly thank you so much for letting me know you’re safe...I’m trying really hard not to comment on your thread..but it’s really hard when I hear people hurting and can’t pop in to say a few comforting words.because I care...and want to help...So please forgive me for putting a reply in your thread...hugs beautiful lady..🤗..

Hanna..I’m sorry your brother is like that..I have an older brother NC from me for over 50 years..then I have a younger brother..we don’t talk much but we both love and care for each other...he lives in the upper central coast...

Paws...oh you would have laughed and cried together if you had seen Kya...The cows across from me..this is a new lot after the drought..they don’t come up the front of mine much..but the other lot stayed out front of mine mostly when he had them...I think if I remember that the property the cows are on is around 800 acres...

Deebi..Oh I hope so much you enjoy your little holiday away from from home...No Deebi..I keep my lawn as low as possible..will be mowing again in a few days..I get a bit spooked out going into the sheds..I bash the sides with a stick before I go in them...plus I’m certain my fur babies would smell them if they were in there....The pastures across the road..really need to be slashed the grass in over 4foot high in places...and dry...I will be as careful as I can...

Don’t be sorry bbff...I know you listen here..and sometimes..if your like me..you want to talk about heaps of things..but hard to type the words out..easier by voice/📞..😢...

I hope everything goes as planned for you and Mr. Deebi..and you get a bit of a mind rest away from your home....If you need to chat...you know I’m always here ..as well as the other beautiful people people here....Much love 💚💜 bbff..and a few extra warm comforting hugs🤗🤗🤗..pubaok yadimh..and 4 Eva in my 💭..🕊🌱🌈🙏🤝👀.

Love , hugs and my care everyone..💜🤗🦋.

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..🕷🦆🎄🌹🌻🌈☄️..golden thread..

[quirkywords]

Grandy I love the way you care for everyone with so much compassion and understanding .

[demonblaster]

Dear Mrs Gorgeous 💑 hi all

Sweety a shame my tablets being naughty unsure when I"ll be able to fix.

Cars (Mr Deebis) getting closer but be a while before back on road.

Sorry for your ww ladies back yeow meant to say she must be in so much pain. Agree fully was thinking as Paws said they could have had the courtesy to let u know but at least now u do. Relief lovey XX

Grandz I"m so proud how you"re getting on and fully agree with our dear Quirky how so caring you are to people. You really are a beautiful soul.

I"ll be keeping an eye on u honeyheart and mostly will c u here it's painfully slow on mobile.

I won"t check back to reply properly to your last post it's harder on this.

Love you very much as you know and extremely grateful having you and the loves here in my life

Xxxxx pubAok always hope to be back on deck as normal asap.

Take care everyone mostly pain passes in time and becomes a memory.

🙋💑,✨💟🙌🎆😘

[Ggrand]

Hello Quirky, Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩..and all...🤗..

Quirky..Thank you so much for your nice words to me...I echo them back to you Quirky..you are a beautiful caring person..I can speak here easily and love to give my care and hopefully support to others....It’s something I love to do.only wish In real life was the same...it’s so hard to even just talk to people...Trusting people in r/l face to face is hard...If I met up with anyone from here, even though I have a lot of care and love for them...I would not be able to talk....even though I know what to say...the words get stuck in my throat and don’t come out....In a group setting...hmm I’m even worse....Seems I can let my fingers do the talking for me😁...a lot better then vocally...

I really hope so much Quirky that your managing through this hard and triggering time..your always welcome to talk here if you feel like it....

Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩..Thank you for letting me know....I hope it gets fixed soon...I will be counting the days... hours... minutes and seconds..💚😁...

I hope everything goes right for you and Mr.Deebi...and I’ll be watching out for you both telepathically....Enjoy your time away dear bbff..here you go..some chocolate 🍫 , candy 🍭..and 2 yummy Chai lattes for on your trip..Please take good care of each other the best you can....Much love dear bbff..with hugs and some hugs 🤗 in a jar 🏺..Just open the jar when you need one...they are comforting and snuggly 🐻🤗 bear hugs..every time you open the 🤗 🏺 a little butterfly 🦋 flys around you..to sprinkle some light into your soul...

Love, hugs and care everyone...

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy...

[demonblaster]

Hi my/our lovely friend to many 👩‍❤️‍👩

Yay for now its behaving. Not a chunk of the time so if I'm sporadic we know why.

Not going to push my luck just wanted you to know sweetyheart.

Hope you're doing well darlin well as can be for nows more than ok.

Sending so much love 💜 peace 🕊 choccy 🍫 and hugs 🤗 too my darling. So sweet those hugs choccy and adorable butterflies and sweets what a treat thank you very very much.

You're magic Grandy love if only one day you'll see what we do treasure.

Nigh nite everyone.

Last thought for the day... 🗯 I can and want to get better

First thought 🗯 on waking... I WILL get better because I can!

[Moonstruck]

Hello there Grandy.....just checking you won't be feeling too alone or lonely this severely over-hyped date of December 25. I really resent the pressure the media and others who genuinely love Christmas put on others who may not have the family or friends around to "celebrate" or the money to lash out on splendid lunches or dinners and over-priced gifts!.....

It can be a terrible time for some...and I'm just checking in with you to make sure you will be Okay. I have no idea where you will be, or who with.....but you won't be "alone".............x

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Moon..and everyone..🤗.

Christmas is not a very happy time of year for me..My late husband would wake on Christmas morning and take himself to the beach leaving myself and our sons at home.

I tried my best to make the day special for them but it was hard without no presents for them...I had no money of my own..but I did try to buy them a little something..I was always happy that Christmas was a long break from school so they weren’t to embarrassed to say they only got a small gift...

I spend Christmas alone the past 6/7 years..Last year I was at my eldest son helping him to evacuate, due to the fires..

I Christmas wrapped an open treat for my fur girls with a fluffy toy in one and a squeaky toy in the other...Just incase animals know about Christmas.other then that I’ll probably sit outside and enjoy nature..with a cup of tea and a small Christmas pudding....and be on BB...a perfect day for me..

I hope everyone enjoys Christmas the best way they like to..

Love, hugs and care Moon and everyone else..

Deebi if your listening here...I hope your enjoying your time away from your home...Much love to you bbff..💚🦋🤗.pubaok...

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (waves to everyone)

I'll be alone on Christmas Day too... we can say hello in the BB Cafe! I still have to wrap little Sam's new toys and next door my neighbour said her little Molly loves to get a squeaky toy, so I have a little toy to wrap for her - aren't we funny buying toys for our pets at Christmas but still it's a bit of fun!

Just took Sam for a long walk by the river as he didn't get out yesterday... and this morning is overcast so it was nice weather for a walk, not too hot.

You sound a bit down, it's this time of year it's hard for those of us alone without family or close friends to spend it with. What does your nice neighbour do at Christmas - does she invite you over at all?

Anyway little Sam sends you soft fluffy hugs oxoxoxox