Childhood grief created emptiness emotionally
Hello davey, I am deeply sorry that your mum passed away because of leukemia, as I also am suffering from the same illness and know exactly how my loved ones are feeling and would undoubtedly feel the same as you if something happens to me, so I don't feel as you are suffering from a normal response.
In saying that it would be a tragic and surprising to lose your mum and I feel your heartache and know that although this illness can be put into remission it can relapse, the trouble is we never know when this could happen, but that doesn't help you.
Please get back to me if you want to.
I am sorry to hear that you experienced a tragic death at such a young age. Experiencing trauma like a death at such a young age can cause us to adapt in many ways to cope with what we are experiencing at that time. At 7 years old we are still developing emotionally and it is no surprise that at that age we do not have the ability to completely deal with and process something so tragic. I believe that seeking some professional advice around this area may help you, from a psychologist. It is possible that unprocessed trauma can manifest itself like this and this could be helpful to work through.