Hello Rod
I have found that physical illness has a huge impact on our mental illness. Often it happens the other way round as well. Both systems need to be reasonably healthy to allow us to function well. I'm sure you know all this but sometimes it's helpful to remember how our bodies work.
I went through a period of painful inflammation but I cannot remember what my condition was called. I had regular blood tests showing the amount of inflammation and when I started to have less pain the blood tests also reflected this. I was away from work for a little while. My GP was about to prescribe a steroid when I told her the pain was going and we were both pleased as steroids can have side effects like weight gain and that was the last thing I needed.
There are of course several illnesses that involve inflammation. Do you know which you have? I found having a name and a set of recognised symptoms really helped me. At least I knew I was not imagining it. The condition may be viral but it still has a name. I think GPs do not realise it is helpful to know the name of an illness. Do you think it would help you? Are you receiving treatment for this?
When you say you have been getting your medication right do you mean for the inflammatory condition or your anxiety? I do hope you are being treated for the inflammation. It's not something that just goes away by itself. Arthritis is a good example of inflammatory illness which can be helped by various medications. I do not think this is your problem, it's simply an example.
I am sad you are feeling grief about your marriage. It is a hard thing to get over no matter what happened. I'm sure both you and your ex wife have regrets about the past. It's easy for me to say put it behind you and you know this is the way to go but unfortunately it does not work like this. If only. I can only say the loss of someone significant in your life and the grief it entails does get better over time. There will always be some regret but we can learn to live with it.
It's easier when you can concentrate on other aspects of your life but when we are unwell this does not work well. Did you see a psychologist in the past? Do you think it would help to see someone again? Just a thought.
Please write in here as often as you wish. I will keep an eye out for your posts.
Mary
