What is the purpose of this all? Life, the world.

DWR · ‎26-03-2015

First post.

I'm 23, female. I've had depression as long as I can remember but lately it has become almost unbearable. I have seen therapists in the past but I feel like I am not myself and just say what I think they want to hear, I struggle with face to face communication about myself.

My mind always goes back to the thought, what is the purpose of all of this? Life? The world? We live and die, we are smaller than a grain of sand to time. It will continue to go on without us, so what is the purpose to be here right now?

white knight · ‎26-03-2015

Hi DWR, welcome to beyond blue forums

I could add to that...perhaps- in the scheme of our solar system smaller than a grain of sand, our universe, smaller again.

I dont know of the comparison but as far as the universe is concerned if it is as big as the world, our earth would be the end of a pin in size. Imagine the size of us as people. And thats one universe, there are countless.

We are minuscule, irrelevant some might say. So do we wallow in grief of being insignificant? No we must find purpose, reason and a life of substance. But how?

Been to a funeral? Grief for a loved one that has passed is real tough. We wonder where they go, their soul etc. We struggle with this until we get over it and rejoin our daily routines. Yes, time is so short but more the reason to find purpose within our time here in life.

For me, if it is of interest, I've found purpose in loving. It all started when I listened to Maharaji Prem Rawat Sunset - (Google that and listen to his youtube words) Also loving strangers like you. Loving strangers that have suffered the loss of their child/children through victims of crime. With victims of crime its been a case of writing poetry to them, to comfort them and to see they still have a future here in life. Most of this "work" is for no reward and no recognition. Here I am anonymous for example.So why do it? Because without love we are less than animals. Animals love life and can love others.

Love can be in music, to other humans, to animals, to the sick, the aged the young the homeless the wartorn the beaten the indigenous. Love can be infinate and you might one day be surprised by someone that knocks on your door and says thankyou.

It happened to me. Around 1987 I visited a woman and child recently split from her husband. They had no furniture and worse still no food. He wanted her to suffer for leaving him. After I left I was financial enough to go to the store and buy about $200 of food and bought a clothes basket to put it in. I left it on her front door.

19 years later we crossed paths and I got the biggest hug. Funny enough I barely recalled the act.

Yep, I know where you are coming from. But I also know what you are missing.

Love in your heart- spread it. It is why we are here.

Tony WK

DWR · ‎26-03-2015

Thank you Tony, your words mean a lot.

For a few years I would give $100 a month to different charities and those in need, I sponsored a child through world vision. Every time I did this it brought a bit of light. I am financially unable to continue at this time. So perhaps volunteering my time would bring the same feeling.

Going back to a point you made of wallowing in grief of our insignificance. Perhaps its acceptance, realisation of a much larger picture that has no meaning or outcome.

Everything I do, whether helpful towards others or just doing laundry brings me back to that question.

Cymru · ‎26-03-2015

DWR, I couldn't answer question for myself, let alone in a post. You mentioned having seen a counsellor in the past ... I can only suggest that is a starting point in answering that question. Oh, and depression sucks.

"No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?"
Holly Golightly
Breakfast at Tiffany's

BKYTH · ‎27-03-2015

Therapists ask the same questions that you, and many of do. If you want purpose then create one..........We live and then we die that is true and life will most certainly go on without us. When I wake up in the morning I ask myself "How can I be of help"?...........You can only die if you have been given the gift of life. You can only ask of life the questions that you and I and so many of us have asked if we live long enough to ask such questions...........Many people don't live long enough to enjoy the luxury of such considerations................Accept what you cannot change and find yourself in that, in which you can invest yourself if you choose, which offers heart and substance and asks of you the best that you can be. Be that and your life will be the best responce to its own questions. I wish you well. Philip.

the_motorcycle_boy · ‎27-03-2015

Hi DWR,

Welcome aboard.

I searched for many years for the truths which could give meaning to my life. I tried different religions, different authors, movies, music, drugs, booze, travel, all the time looking for answers.(I also sponsored a child in Kenya which gave me a bit of light too, but it wasn't enough).

Then at age 31 I got severe depression and had a breakdown but during my recovery I learned how to be human all over again. I realized and then believed that PEOPLE were the answer I was looking for! It was a reciprocal arrangement. The more I loved others the more I loved myself and vice versa. I also was able to formulate a purpose to life. For me, it was to live and love while helping people on their journeys. Because basically, we are all in the same boat!

Hope this is helpful.

TMB

DWR · ‎27-03-2015

You might as well live.

- Dorothy Parker

the_motorcycle_boy · ‎29-03-2015

Hi DWR,

Just wanted to add that I think volunteering is a great idea of yours! Also, to acknowledge the depth of your depression and to invite you to stay here at the Beyond Blue forums, if that suits. There are many people here who genuinely care, who can provide much support and information. Sometimes, it just takes a little while to access what you need, that's all.

TMB

LisaT · ‎29-03-2015

I've been there where you question what's it all for and I know it's not a nice place to be as it leaves you feeling so pointless and in a state of despair. I try not to think about it so much anymore and accept that I am apart of it all no matter how small. These thoughts will pass.

PurpleShade · ‎29-03-2015

I have been asking this question lately 🙂

My answer for myself is the same as when I last asked, 'I don't know and do I really need to know in order to feel all the good things in life?' If a bird sings a fine tune on my morning run, it lifts me up and helps me to feel a bit better, that's enough. It takes some energy for me to accept good things but it is worth it when I do and as others have articulated so beautifully, helping others, smiling as I work by a stranger or entertaining a child with bubbles is a purpose that's enough.

I love the fact the sun will shine with or without me, some days I'm able to embrace its warm and others not so much.

The other day I was feeling a bit despondent and kind of pondering the whys when a puppy escaped his home and came racing up and whacked my leg in excitement, I let him bounce around my legs so his owner could catch him to take him home. We both giggled at the dogs behaviour and on we went. That connection helped me smile all day, I enjoyed that little bit of meaning I was able to hold for another day.