Triggers- what are your distractions for recovery?

[white knight]

Do you suffer from triggers? What is a trigger?

For me, a trigger is a moment that panic can set in quickly. From that moment on it is a battle to overcome the fallout. Often a panic attack will accompany the shaking, the stress and for me anyhow- the overwhelming temptation to- cry.

Today it happened. My wife and I went for a drive for coffee. Lovely sunny winters day arrived at our favourite country general store café at a very small town only to see the "closed" sign. Ok, we'll go to a country house nearby where they advertise Devonshire tea. As we pulled up the thought came to me about cash. The other place took eftpos which is what we use all the time. This little place isn't likely to take cards. As the old lady approached I didn't have time to talk about it to my wife...in fact the old lay was impossible to interrupt so I could speak about the matter. On and on she talked as we walked about 50 metres to the "tea rooms" all the while not able to talk.

As we arrived at the rotunda I had to interrupt but the shakes started and I was desperate with wanting to ask my wife if she had any real money. So out it came "do you take eftpos" I asked. At that exact moment an old man called out to the old lady something about taking his dogs to a friends place. She walked towards him out of sight. So I didn't get my answer. This freaked me out more in frustration. I turned to my wife and asked her "I hope you have cash"? "Oh, she thought, "I don't think so". I had to return to the car where I found $8 in coins then returned and my wife found $5 in her purse. The old lady returned and we asked the cost of Devonshire tea and she replied "$16"- we were short $3. She was ok with that and being locals we'd make up for it when seeing her in town.

The event shook me up. The rotunda and nearby sheds had jugs as a display many of them so it was a distraction. About 20 minutes later I was 90% recovered. The overwhelming desire is to cry but being older and male it doesn't come.

Distraction is my tool for recovery. I don't think there is a better or faster remedy. Do you know of any?

Prevention is better than cure and having $50 or so on you is the preventative measure. We'll try and do that of course.

Feel free to contribute.

TonyWK

[Doolhof]

Hi Tony,

Thanks for this topic. I find that sometimes I do not know what has triggered me. Maybe if I did, then I would have a greater understanding of how to reduce the triggers or at least be better prepared for how to deal with them when they happen.

It must be really hard for yourself and many people when tears can be releasing, but for one reason or another it does not seem right or proper to shed some tears.

Recently I was in a restaurant with friends and could not work out what to order that was gluten free to cater for my Coeliac disease. The menu confused me. My mind turned it into an overwhelming situation! I ran out of the restaurant and cried.

A solution I have found is to telephone the restaurant in advance or Google them to see if they have gluten free options. Even going to someone else's house can have a similar effect if there is nothing there for me to eat. On most occasions I take my own food as I am too timid to ask if they will cater for my needs!

Distractions are good. Helps to get the mind focussing on something else.

Cheers to you Tony and to All reading,

From Dools

[Guest5643]

Hi tony.

Im absoloutly mortified, i went on tiled roof today for first time, had major anxiety and blood pressure dropped. I lied down but slow breathing wasnt helping. My arms and legs were tingling and numb. I felt like i was going to pass out any time i put my head up. I was so scared uo there i had to call fire brigade. 3 guys came with ladder. One got on roof and helped me down. Im soooooooooooo embarassed, they came with sirens also. Lynne

[white knight]

Hi Dools

My daughter is attending rehab sessions from a hospital stay she had recently. So she relays things to me.

She said she was taught today that "triggers" are not something you can get rid of so you have to have a toolbox of tricks to remedy the situation. That makes sense. Avoidance is also a remedy. Like Lynne (Helium) told us of being on a tiled roof, best remedy now is avoiding roofs. Of course there is always a first time we have to try out before we realise that wasn't such a good idea! Or in my case as I'm 63yo now- looking up at the attic windows thinking about painting them and saying to myself- "I think I'll get a painter to do that task!

Not knowing your triggers is a bigger issue. How can you remedy/avoid a trigger if you don't know its source? By experience, and Dools you now know that part of the preparation for attending any venue is to ring prior to make your choice of meal. They might email the menu so you can take your time?

Triggers in my experience, is losing control or approaching an embarrassing situation. As a young adult I was a terrible money manager. Anything to do with money now I leave for my wife to do. Unless it was how it was yesterday with me the only party worried about cash on hand.

Lynne, it sounded like a panic attack.

TonyWK

[Guest5643]

Hi tony.

I think your right it was probably a panic attack. Its hard to tell sometimes panic attack vs bad anxiety attack. Its so scary when one second your 100% fine and the next that happens. Ive noticed when im out i can sometimes distract myself by looking at whatever and spelling it out on my head but it dosnt work when im at home for some reason. Before i took my dog for a walk today i had anxiety starting and my dog jumped up at me which is like a slap in the face to snap out of it. That helps enormously. I realy look foward to reading peoples distraction techniques.

[quirkywords]

White knight,

Thanks for this thread.

i used to say I had no triggers, till one day reading an article aabout a mother struggling reminded me of when my children were young. I just cried uncontrollably. I had no idea there were issues about mothering that I had not addressed.

i think triggers are liable to ambush us when we least expect them, We can have tools but some things trigger us for apparently no reason and we can’t anticipate Thame.

Quirky

[Guest_9610]

Hello white knight.

Triggers: After reading your post about Triggers & how those dreadful experiences your currently dealing with. I truly do understand your situation 100% I also have the identical problem in dealing with triggers. At present I'm struggling very much just to put a couple words together due to severe anxiety depression etc & shaking very badly just trying to write this to you.

BB has a Fact Sheet out that called "Relaspsing". In that fact sheet ( I have a physical copy). In there in, it explains Everything you need to know about Triggers, what to do about them + so on.

Hope this info helps you just as much as it did for me. I refer to very often. Hope you try to understand what I'm trying to convey here. The brain is barely functioning just to put a couple of words together.

Regards

Amiella

.

[Guest5643]

Hi quirky.

The amount of times i say to myself 'well i didnt see that one coming'. And so many times something that has never been a trigger in the past suddenly has become a trigger. Lynne

[quirkywords]

Lynne

hanks for sharing that because people of talk about all their triggers as they know them so well. I am always surprised and I have noticed if I am in a low mood the more chance there is that I will be triggered. Not sure if anyone finds that as well.

Quirky

[white knight]

Hi everyone, thank you for all your replies, the topic is proving helpful

In my case Quirky I was very relaxed prior to the trigger. I am convinced on or two causes- a/ a trigger to not having cash on us (poor money manager when young) or b/ it's cyclic. Which results in a hair trigger. But I dont get warnings.

Lynne, I was like that with money.

Amiellia, you did very well, thankyou for the extra effort and the reference

It seems I'm not alone.

Tony