Spiralling for the first time

[Aurora_B]

Hi everyone!

It’s my first time posting here. I’ve had dysthymia my entire life, only diagnosed a few years ago in my early 20s. I had always thought it was just the way I am. While I have never really been happy, I’ve functioned really well, maintained healthy relationships and been generally content with my life.

I lost my job a few months ago due to Covid19 and I also have a chronic immune disorder, so I have been isolating hard core for the entirety of the pandemic. I think this combination has sent me spiralling. For the first time in my life, my depression isn’t a melancholic mist but a full bore hail storm. This is the first time I’ve been really scared of how I feel and the thoughts I’m having, and I don’t feel in control at all.

It’s also the first time my day to day functioning has been impaired and I just can’t find the ‘oomph’ to do anything, or even care about anything. I’m so listless and spend far too much time on my phone or laptop.

Anyway! We all know the symptoms of depression, and I’m having them all right now. Thought it might help to connect with other people in the same boat.

Hope everyone is doing as well as they can be.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Aurora_B,

Welcome to the forums, we know that it can be really tough to reach out for support, and you have shown a lot of strength in sharing your story here with us. We're so sorry to hear how low you've been feeling, and we can hear that this pandemic has had a big impact on your wellbeing. Please know that you've come to a safe space to talk through these feelings, and our caring community is here to provide you with as much support, advice and conversation as you need.

If you feel up to it, we'd also recommend reaching out to our Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service. This website is regularly updated with information, advice and strategies to help you manage your wellbeing and mental health during this time. You can also call our dedicated support line, staffed by mental health professionals, which is available 24/7 on 1800 512 348.

We hope that you keep checking in to let us know how you're going, whenever you feel up to it.

[Aurora_B]

Thanks for the welcome Sophie, I will definitely reach out to the coronavirus mental well-being support service. Thank you

[mocha delight]

Hi auoroa_b I’ve not been diagnosed with anything yet but I’m on antidepressants and have had my second appointment with my psychologist on Wednesday of this week which she mentioned she agrees with my gp that I have depression but not sure what type yet but that’s kind of som3 kind of confirmation in a way.

[Aurora_B]

Hi mocha delight, I’m glad you’re getting help already, that’s a big step to take. Fingers crossed they will give you a specific diagnosis at your next appointment. I know for me at least, having a name for it was extremely helpful and validating. It would be good for me to see a professional too, but I just don’t have the money for it right now