Dear maddie faye
I would say trust your intuition tomorrow about what feels right. I hope you can really enjoy your day together.
My brother sounds similar to your boyfriend. He does have some depression and restarted on antidepressants last year. He keeps ultra busy with his diary filled with activities every week. He finds it difficult to communicate about emotions and will instead often talk about technology-based stuff, basically facts rather than feelings or emotions.
It’s like doing distracts him from feeling, and focussing on technical stuff (e.g. computers or audio gear) also distracts him from feeling. He has started to get help from mindfulness meditation though. Originally he found meditation torturous because he thought your mind had to be empty with no thoughts. Then he learned it’s ok if thoughts arise and you can just observe them without judging them.
He cannot ever reply if anyone asks him how he is feeling and he’s always been like this. It can leave you with a strange, blank feeling. But I’ve learned to navigate the difficulties he has in emotional communication and also realise his feelings are there, including his love for me as a sister, even if he doesn’t communicate these things the way others might.
I don’t know if that helps or has any relevance, but let go of any pressure you might feel from others and just trust what feels right at the time. And most importantly, be gentle and kind towards yourself. Often when we are kind to ourselves it flows into good interactions and outcomes with others.
