Hi, I'm a 22 year old female. I'm currently studying TAFE and working part-time as a Beauty/Massage Therapist. Both in a salon and Freelance.
This year has been personally difficult. I've had to give up my Arts degree due to heavy debts. My former retail job of 3 years closed down. I've lost 2 jobs within 6 months. I dealt with 6 months of bullying at a hair salon, which resulted in my abrupt resignation, and I'm still grieving from the loss of a friend of mine early this year. My family, already struggling financially, pressured me into doing this career because it's 'financially sustainable'.
I've since then tried my best to work to keep in money, along with something that would suit me. While many people have said I'm good at Massage, and it's not a bad job, I've also been struggling in it. Due to pressure and inexperience, I often come across as 'socially awkward', and end up offending clients. With my current boss adding more shift days to my schedule, along with TAFE it's becoming harder to cope with. I've had to cancel Freelance and in turn drop some clients out, some responding harshly. I've already received several bad reviews, both about me and the salons I've worked at. One of them firing me as a result.
It's ironic that I'm suffering at a 'wellbeing' job. I know I'm very lucky to be working in Beauty. Instead, I just can't help but feel utter resentment and depressed. Waking up to go to work can feel at times, dreading. Feeling isolated and lonely from the world, even alienated from my peers. Nearly every day I feel tired and drowsy, and it takes effort to fake a smile and 'act friendly'. I can't help but keep dwelling on the bad reviews, no matter how many people are satisfied with my work. At this point, I am simply looking for advice or support.
Thanks.
