Overwhelmed exhausted and over everything.

[Myzz_Harper]

Hello this is my first post. I have visited + read threads on and off over the years this is my first time back in a long time. I have noticed a change in Beyond Blue for the better and have made use of some of those improvements so good on all who are involved. I am 60 years old and my life has evaporated without me noticing. I am so angry upset disappointed in myself and a system that allows people like me to slip through the cracks. I am a functioning depressive functioning enough to work when I can to earn just enough to live.i feel tired, anxious, apathetic at other times and just about gave up on finding help. Having to repeat a selection of problems a lifetimes worth in 1 hour to a new shrink or psychologist who is often overworked or actually just bored to death by other people’s problems often just make you feel worse. It’s not OK being a depressive, I am not OK and no amount of govt funding is going to make that campaign any more than a feel good except size. Oops I digress. I don’t want Dysthymia, Existential Depression (I think therefore I am depressed) to ruled what time I have left. I have so little hope or energy left, no money for expensive help and find 8 sessions a year with a shrink or psych ( if you can find one) very unsatisfactory ( useless) also SA seems to have limited resources if you don’t fit into the right category. White, post menopausal, slowly dying.

[White_Rose]

Dear Myzz Harper

Welcome to the forum. Thank you for your compliments. A great of work has gone into improving the forum. Glad you made the leap from reader to participant. Your post made me feel quite sad for your situation. I am older than you and I do understand about my life span coming to an end. It sounds obvious to say we will all die one day but it is a topic many find uncomfortable.

Looking back on our lives can make us regret the things that never happened or went wrong in some way. I've certainly been there but there are also some lovely parts in my past life. I first became depressed 20 years ago. Although I am no longer depressed the idea can linger in the background with the 'what if' question.

Our regrets about what we did not do are more painful than missing out because of some other factor or person. Maybe we just want to blame someone other than ourselves. No one wants to be depressed, it's such a horrible experience. Sometimes addressing the issues can feel as painful as pushing them away.

I do not know much about the SA mental health scene as I live in Qld. Others who write in here and live in SA may be better able to help you. I agree it's not OK being depressed. So may I make a couple of suggestions?

See your GP and get a referral to a psychiatrist. I think you know the Medicare benefits for psychologists. When you have been depressed for a long time you are probably going to need a lot of consistent and frequent therapy which is not possible with the limited access to a psychologist or will cost a fortune. The annual limits do not apply to psychiatrists.

Next, do not try to cram all your problems into one session. When these are complex it can be hard to keep track of them for the therapist. You are familiar with them but he/she is not. Perhaps you can make a list of the more painful problems and give it to the psych. Together you can go through the process more gently and learn about each other. It may feel that you are not going anywhere but it really is the quickest way.

What do you think of getting a physical check up with your GP? Our physical health does impact on our mental health and getting that part fixed may give you the boost you want. At the very least you can see what is physical and what emotional. It does help.

I hope I have given you something to think about. Love to know how you feel.

Mary