Newly diagnosed with depression? What to expect.

[white knight]

You’ve been diagnosed with depression possibly anxiety as well beforehand that led to depression. Your Doctor starts you on medication and you return home. You arrive home and the first thing you decide is to ring a friend. But your friend who has a good ear normally cant help you, that’s what they believe. After 15 minutes the conversation drifts off into talking about the nightclub she visited last weekend and the guy she met. You’re alone.

The same thing happens with family members but they listen more intently. Over time they too feel the stress of not being able to reach into your mind to fix the problem. Even though they do their best it isn’t enough. You are still alone.

You visit your club members. They have a BBQ at a park and show their cars off. You are so much under the dizziness of medication you are emotional. You begin to talk about this to a “friend” and the friend turns to you and says “I’m here for fun and more fun, not to listen to this…snap out of it”!!

You prepare dinner and your defacto arrives home from work. He/she listens, you weep and you drink a cuppa. But it seems you cant get enough of their time and support.

This process is likely what you are going to experience as a newly diagnosed person with emotional troubles. So here are some tips for those wandering around wondering about their future-

1/ Don’t expect anyone to understand Google- “Topic: they just wont understand, why?- beyondblue”

2/ Accept your illness. Fighting it wont work and that will be unfair to others in your life “Topic: depression a ship on the high seas- beyondblue” and “Topic: Do we expect a smooth road in life- beyondblue”

3/ Expect the future of your illness to be a lifelong management work in progress not something anyone will cure.

4/ Be sympathetic with your loved ones “Topic: who cares for the carer?- beyondblue” and “Topic: embracing the embracer- beyondblue”

5/ Realise you might need to revert back to some basic living “Topic: MELTDOWN, back to basics- beyondblue”

6/ Investigate the positives “topic: Depression, are there any positives?- beyondblue”

7/ Become positive “Topic: 30 minutes can change your life- beyondblue”

8/ Stick to your doctors orders and visit often  “Topic: medication is a whirlpool- beyondblue”

9/ Rely on yourself “topic: the best praise you’ll ever get- beyondblue”

10/ Get on with life. “Topic: Getting depression into perspective- beyondblue”

Can you add to this?

Tony WK             

[white knight]

Hi JessF

I sort of agree that depression can get you that low that you always see the bad, but it can also be an individual thing. If we add the ingredient of guilt it is different IMO. Guilt can be a really bad thing to juggle.

I can only mention my own case here, being, that when I'm criticised by someone I immediately give them the benefit of the doubt because a/ they could be right b/ if they are right then I'm wrong and have to address the issue and c/ as I fall into the low confidence mode at times ...of course they are right. This thought process is automatic regardless of whether in a depressive cycle or not. It is only later down the track I overcome this and question whether that criticism is justified. Anger follows often. So in terms of what to expect from being newly diagnosed with depression in terms of other people interacting with you? Does it depend on how deep the depression is? I think so. Because although I have experienced depression for 20 years or so, I don't think I've had it (much) to the point of which you describe even though I had suicidal tendencies in the early days. Or would it be an individual thing you describe?

Elizabeth, interesting comparison. I've always found it odd that we, the one with the illnesses don't see our mental struggles like physical ones. Those first in touch with mental illness think its just a pill and its gone. Then the slow reality sets in (hence this thread). Education is so important.

Tony WK

[Elizabeth CP]

People's definition of recovery can vary. Years ago I suffered from severe back pain which impacted on everything I did. I received a variety of treatments including physio & took on board all the advice I was given including exercising. 2 years later I recovered after a lot of hard work. I consider myself recovered as I was once again able to do what I needed without the severe pain I also was aware that even though I had recovered I was at risk of further episodes if I wasn't careful. This means trying to maintain my fitness with regular exercise & avoiding lifting heavy objects incorrectly.

A niece of mine had a severe breakdown following the birth of her baby resulting in a long period in a psych hospital & ongoing professional & family supports including medication for several years after which she weaned off the medication & considered herself recovered. She was back to living life as she wanted. Because she knows she is at risk of relapse if she isn't careful she ensures both her & her husband are alert for any signs of problems & she makes sure she does what she knows works for her to keep herself well.

My message is that while recovery is possible in the same way a person needs to look after themselves physically to prevent further physical illnesses A person who has recovered from a mental illness needs to use what they have learnt to keep themselves mentally well.

[150lashes]

This is a really interesting thread and I appreciate this topic.

In terms of recovery I do agree that it is a subjective thing. Do you think it is possible for the patient to consider themselves recovered but the GP doesn't?

Is recovery defined as to be exactly back to the person that you were before the depression?

Is it possible to be recovered but to have also changed?

For example, say you were a workaholic who valued work very highly and worked long hours - very career centric. Then you experience depression and anxiety and take a break from everything to manage your condition.

After some time you then feel happy and at peace with yourself. Clear thinking and overall back to your normal self.

However the whole experience has changed you, in that you no longer have the drive, self esteem or confidence to get back out there in that same career focussed mindset you once had.

You also have various job opportunities fall at your feet and these things would have once excited you and you would have been approached. But now they don't, and you no longer see any benefit to it. You realise it just doesn't make you happy and just want to live a simple life.

Have you recovered and returned to normal or are you still suffering from depression and anxiety?

[Elizabeth CP]

It is certainly possible to recover but change. If I decide to change my lifestyle because I find I am happier with the new lifestyle that is a sign of being mentally well not suffering depression & anxiety.

If I injured myself & the physio provided exercises to aid recovery. If I decide to continue doing the exercises after recovery because I felt good doing them & thought they would prevent further problems I would not class myself as still injured. In the same way someone who realised that they are happier working in a different/less stressful job is sensible if they take up work that suits them.

[150lashes]

Thanks for your input.

I'm starting to feel like I am going mad with no one understanding me.

In many ways if I didn't suffer depression I probably never would have stopped living the life that I was and now looking bad it really wasn't a healthy lifestyle.

So maybe it's thank you depression?!

[white knight]

Hi 150lashes

"Thankyou depression". We always see depression as a negative. It's so invigorating for you to see something positive from the illness. Doing so can, if it happens regularly enough, become a snowball and compound resulting, in the end, to having a profound effect on your life.

Google "Topic: depression- are there any positives?- beyondblue"

Elizabeth, Recovery....interesting again. I believe full recovery from a serious state of depression is rarely possible in that relapses occur and once the mind has found fragility it is rare for it to gain strength that it once had, if it had it at all. That's purely my view.

Based on this I feel recovery is a state that you have returned to being functional with changes. Full to part time work, changes in environment, job, partner status, and so on.

Being functional, stable, unlikely to experience severe depression again and this state to be maintained over say a 2-3 year period. Again, I'm basing this on my own experience and logic.

This is really subjective though. I suppose being recovered as being back to how you were in every way isn't common so how could it be realistic?

Tony WK