My story

[buster44]

2015...
The year of disasters, the year of pain, the year I loss the person I was.
In 2015 i was diagnosed with high levels of depression and anxiety, I never admitted to it and I never accepted it. I moved to another city this year, to find out who I was, find my feet and wonder what happened to me throughout those years. No one understood why I left home, many probably didn’t care and many thought it was a phase. I was surrounded by drug abuse, domestic violence and fear.
I was 15years old when i removed myself from my home and tried to find my own way, many would say it was stupid, but to me it showed strength, courage and bravery.
2016 I moved back to home, back to a town where I lost the person I had become but giving it another shot.
2017 I finally admitted the illness, I have depression and Anxiety. I am not in anyway someone who thrives off attention, It could seem that way but I simply am the one who is afraid of people seeing who the real me is. I was the one who never told the truth about my family because I was simply embarrassed, but letting everyone know what I battled for many years wasn’t embarrassment it showed independence . Something I am so passionate about now, how I could come this far after everything I went through growing up, and of course I didn’t go through it alone, I had family, i had friends.
I don’t enjoy going out all the time, getting drunk, sleeping around; simply because that’s not where I want to go in life, I saw how that turns adults, I saw how that can destroy families, I was a victim of abuse, violence and I got this far and i’m not willing to give up everything i have fought for now
I lost friends simply because they wanted the party life and i couldn’t keep up with it because they could never understand how much it made me hurt inside, so i distance myself from them, and I know that was one of the best decisions, because I know have friends who will ask how I am
Admitting my depression was one of the strongest things I have ever done, and although I will always have it I now know I have people around me

[geoff]

Hi Buster, can I welcome you and I'm pleased you have posted your comment.

Sometimes circumstances may prevent us from admitting that we do actually have depression, alcohol or drugs may camouflage the illness we don't want to accept and may put us into denial.

It does take an awful amount of courage to admit you're struggling with depression, this doesn't make you or anybody else weak, it's finally an admission that you're not feeling well and haven't been for a long time.

Friends do normally disappear, not so much that they don't like you, it's simply because they don't know what to say or do to help you out, so they take the easy way out, and vanish.

Have you been to see your doctor because that's your first port of call, they can then help you by getting the ball rolling. Geoff.

[quirkywords]

Hi Buster

I welcome you to this caring forum.

Your story touched me as you show you have struggled and are trying find yourself.

There are people like you who want more out of life than drinking and partying

Geoff has given you helpful advice.

Admitting you have depression is a good first step. See in a doctor is the next step

You write honestly and from the heart.

Quirky