I googled 'depression' to find out if it was something I suffered from. Which brought me to this site.
I have found a little comfort reading a couple of stories from others who have described pretty much what I go through.
I have felt a sense of loneliness and hopelessness for years now and thought I would get over this in time.
But to this day I have no interest in hanging out with friends. Most of the time I'm in my bedroom with the door closed alone with my thoughts. Music, movies and food as my only escape.
I have a lot different talents and have not gone on to pursue any of them further because I lose interest. Sports, art, leadership all put on hold and fading with every day I let slip by. Like one of my coach's in the past put it. "Your got no ticker!"
I help others a lot with their problems. Family, relationships, drugs etc. Yet none know I'm suffering inside myself. I have tried to explain somewhat only to see bewildered faces looking back at me.
I love to laugh and have a great sense of humour but I feel hopeless inside when I'm alone which doesn't make me fake. Just don't know why I'm like this.
In the past I have found comfort in writing poetry/music, also alcohol and drugs. I have slowed down on alcohol, only having the odd drink on occasions. Drugs (Marijuana). I haven't touched for 7 years. I've even tried the spiritual approach. Because I am a believer, but still come up short.
I'm almost certain I have depression and through this site and the people who have shared their struggles I am now wanting to seek professional help.
With the right help and taking it one day at a time I know we can enjoy a more brighter future. Thank you for reading.
