Dear Tess
I thought I would jump in here with a couple of comments. Antidepressants have had a bad press for many years and with great justification. My sister took them and really did not do well on them. So I fully understand your reluctance.
Going to see your GP does not automatically mean you will be offered ADs. This is a good first step to find out how best to help you. I also have weight issues and over many years have struggled with the classic lose some, gain some more. It is demoralising and certainly adds to your lack of self worth feelings.
You ask how would you cope if something was seriously wrong. Well something is seriously wrong. You are unhappy and no matter what the cause, this is a matter of grave concern. You are as deserving of help as anyone else, intelligence has nothing to do with it.
Why do you think you are not intelligent? You are running a successful business. If you were not there, contributing equally with your husband, would the business be successful. You are battling the "I'm useless" syndrome. I know it well and so do most of the people who write in here.
It sounds as though you are depressed, although I am not qualified to make this diagnosis. Having nothing to be depressed about is how it works. People do not necessarily become depressed because of what is happening in their lives. Depression is a beast that strikes at people in all walks of life and often for no apparent reason. That's why it is a beast. Worry and stress can cause high blood pressure, lack of exercise may lead to heart problems, falling over can lead to a broken arm, but depression often strikes out of the blue.
If you go to see your GP you may find that many of the difficulties in your life may have a solution. What have you got to lose? Yes, it's possible that you will be offered ADs. This type of medication has changed and improved hugely during the past 20 years. For one thing there are many different options so that if one type is not suitable another may be the right one. There are side effects with some medications, though often these are transient. But if one does not work you can try another.
You have no idea how I kicked and screamed, metaphorically speaking, against taking ADs. Now I take one that has no side effects on me and really, really helps me. And I am not a fan of medication in any form.
Please start with a chat with your GP. You have nothing to lose and all to gain.
Mary
