Depressed and anxious

[rh456]

Hey all

i lost my job 6 months ago and since then have been applying for jobs. I have been trying different options/areas but not been successful. I have had a couple of interviews and have been close but they have gone with someone else. I have been left disappointed each time and now feel im falling apart and am not good enough. Im anxious waiting on an interview i had last week..i hate the waiting and not knowing.  I do my best, but either thats not good enough or im not the right fit. I do my research/preparation- that in itself is a little stressful. I am at that point where ive said to myself - do i want to put myself through that interview stress again thinking that ill be disappointed again? (i keep doing it as i need a job for the money and self confidence). 

Trying to keep myself occupied by watching dvds and playing games, but even doing something that usually makes me smile/laugh is not working. When i usually feel “down” i watch some funny videos, but even this is not helping.  

Feeling sick with worry. All i need right now is a job, someone to believe in me and support.  People try and be helpful by saying “something will come up” but that’s not helping 

cant afford to go to a counsellor either, as my finances are low due to above situation stress. 

[james1]

Hello rh456,

I'm sorry to hear you've been really struggling with the job search and interviews. It can be very hard to stay positive and optimistic, and I understand the lingering fear of not being good enough. From the outside, it's very easy for me to say "close enough means you're actually really good!". But I also understand it can feel like, "close enough means not good enough". 

I think you're doing the right thing by giving yourself little breaks here and there.  The dvds and games may have been a good 'down time' activity before, but perhaps they are too passive now to properly keep yourself mentally and emotionally healthy. I find exercise helps me feel productive, even when I'm not working. Or maybe seeing friends and family in your down time, particularly if you are looking for that social support and belief in you. It sounds like the empty platitudes don't help - I think you are within your right to gently tell them it's not what you need right now.

I hope you are given an opportunity soon and hopefully last week's interview comes good. Otherwise, take care of yourself in between. It's very draining and you are certainly not alone in struggling with being in between jobs.

James