Burnout or Depression?

[Zoe111]

Hi People,

I’m new here, bit nervous, wonder if anyone has some wisdom for me. I am working full time in a management position in a specialist health field that can be highly emotive and divisive. I have spent >20 years in this field supporting the clients and yet still had work life balance with my partner, children and family. I made the decision to take the fulltime management job as my children are almost grown and I felt I had a lot to offer the position. At first it was going well however the last 6 months things have not been going well, I feel disillusioned with my workplace, feel I do everything wrong, worthless, anxious at work, brain working very slowly, not motivated, avoid certain difficult people as my heart races if I see them, coming home crying in the car most nights, no energy, no pleasure to go out and do anything outside work. When I started 18 months ago I felt none of this was excited to be doing it.

I don’t want to just leave for the following reasons:

my bosses tell me I’m doing a good job and I feel I would be letting them down

Don’t know where else to go options are limited

feel I would be running away and should face my problems at work and deal with it

I don’t know how much longer I can go on though. If I left and went elsewhere would it be the same now? Don’t know what to do does anyone have any experience to share?

[Lost4eva]

Dear Zoe111,

Welcome to the forums!!

I have been in your situation and unfortunately, I did the old knee-jerk reaction and just resigned - so it is great that you are taking time to think about it and rationalise!

Having now had the benefit of hindsight, I think I had some options - maybe this will assist you?

1. Workplace counselling - my work had a counsellor that you could call anonymously to discuss your situation. They were trained professionals and you could talk to them about anything and it was freely offered by my workplace. I should have called them!

2. Leave - we all have sick leave and annual leave. Taking some of that may have really helped me!

After doing number one and two, I think I would have had the brain space to identify why I was feeling that way and how to fix it maybe. Then I could have approached my workplace to request an amendment to my working hours/placement - whatever it was that were triggering my sadness … because I'm sure my workplace would have accommodated it, in order to keep me - and I would still be employed in the job I actually loved!!

I really hope this is helpful to you Zoe111. Let us know how you go.

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Zoe111,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for joining us! I appreciate you sharing what's happening; it sounds like there's a lot going on for you! Can I ask, how have you been coping so far?

To answer your question first about burnout vs depression; this is something only a GP can tell you! We can certainly get burnout and then recover, or it can slip into depression - it just depends on the intensity and the length of the symptoms.

All of your options make sense and I think it's great that you've been thinking about where to go and what to do. It can be so easy to just get stuck in these cycles without thinking or being motivated to change.

Can I ask if you've considered counselling? Lost4eva suggested this in their post and I really encourage you to think about it. This can really help with those thoughts of doing everything wrong, being anxious, feeling disillusioned, avoiding people, crying in the car and everything else you've listed. You may even find that once all these things are much less intense, you find that work/life balance easier or your decision about where to go much easier to make.

A lot of workplaces usually do EAP (employee assistance programs) which are a few free sessions with a counsellor (either phone or in person), or you can get 10 subsidised visits from your GP with a Mental Health Care Plan.

Hopefully this gives you a place to start -

[Zoe111]

Thanks for that Lost4eva, I must say I would have quit also straight away if not for long service leave in less than 2 years. I have had employee counselling in the past but partner made me go to the GP who sent me to a clin psych, had first session and stirred up all things about work and family but feel I have to do something. Going to employer tomorrow to ask about transferring or dropping hours or something. Here’s hoping!

[Zoe111]

Thanks for replying! Was made to go to GP by partner and already seen clin psych and hoping to work through things. Still feeling pretty shaky but trying to formulate a plan to follow through.