Canada - other highlights (the last one, I promise :)

[Neil_1]

I think I could write forever about this time away, but I might wrap it up here;   although another thing that I did that I didn’t think I’d ever do was to go zip-lining and that was FUN!  Firstly with my daughter up at Grouse Mountain in Vancouver;  and the 2nd time on the cruise with both son and daughter at a little place called Skagway, in amongst a huge pine forest.  That’s pretty much the major tree over there – pines.  And zip-lining is awesome fun.  

Other highlights

In Kelowna, we got to hire a speed boat (250 horsepower engine) and boy oh boy, that was some awesome fun.  Driving a speed boat out on a massive lake was just AWE-some.  That’s something I’ve always wanted to do and is also on a list of things that I’d like to own in my future and to do some fishing, etc.  What a buzz that was.  

And in Ketchikan (Alaska) we took a tour off our cruise ship and boarded a float plane.  The float plane business in Alaska and Vancouver is massive and we saw so many of them taking off etc, that we thought, we really should do this.  So in the plane there was room for 7, including the pilot and that’s another incredible experience that’s really hard to describe.  We flew over some great scenery near Ketchikan, mountains, streams and many lakes.  Even landed on a lake and we got to stand out on the float of the plane for a little while, with gigantic mountains rising up all around us.  It was peaceful beyond words.  

 In Banff, we also were able to hire a little boat with a small-ish outboard motor and took it out  on a lake and the kids were able to operate that one, which was a big thrill for them.  

Alaska and Canada, over and out.  

Neil

[gmc]

Looks like it's been an amazing trip, Neil. I'm very glad for you. As I read, I was imagining all of it. It surely was a great time and I hope you "recharged your batteries" for the next year or so.

[geoff]

dear Neil, my friend, it's so lovely to have you back, but not taking anything away from your holiday, which sounds to have been a brilliant time for you all. Geoff.

[Stuck14]

Welcome back Neil. Sounds like you all had an incredible holiday!!! Hope the jet lag doesn't last too long an that all those amazing experiences an feelings you had on your trip will stay with you forever. How are your kids??? 

[Jo3]

Hi Neil

Sounds like you and your family had an AMAZING holiday.  Though I am so glad that you are back on here, I have missed you heaps!!!

Take care and chat again soon

Jo 

ps. sorry it's a short post

[Neil_1]

Dear gmc, Geoff, Shay and Jo

Thank you all for your kind responses and yes, the trip was just amazing.  Although now I'm coming down with some kind of flu like thing - bad sore throat and achey.  I blame the plane trip I reckon - such a bad place to be on in confined spaces for a long time.  Oh well, plenty of water and rest - still it sux to be crook after such a top holiday.

Shay;  our daughter is her normal amazingly wonderful self - although we had some really bad sad news upon our arrival home - one of her budgies passed away about a week before we got back - which caused her heaps of sadness and tears.  Certainly not the best way to arrive back;  but she had a brilliant holiday.

Our son - um, well - he's super happy to be back home in his room with his internet stuff that he does.  Things seem to be ok on the front of any self harming, as far as we can tell.  But on a not so good note;  the two of us really locked horns on a number of occasions overseas.  So much so, that I was in tears a couple of times afterwards.  Not such a good fatherly role model thing - really hard to describe about it all.  But largely to do with him always correcting me with things I say or the way I drive, or largely anything that I do.  So where does that leave us for the future?  Excellent questions.  I don't know at this stage.

Neil

[Stuck14]

I'm so sorry to hear about your daughters budgie, it's always so sad an hard when you lose a pet. Hope that she is doing as well as possible <3

I'm also very sorry to hear about you an your son. This must be so unbearably hard for you as all you want is for him to be happy an healthy an know that he is loved. It's great news in regards to the self harming an is it possible that him challenging you an criticising you is a sign of him getting better? I know it probably sounds really stupid,  but is it possible that his attitude now is bolder an more apparent then before when he was really struggling?? Its not good that you seem to be coping it an it must be gut wrenching as you love him so much. I don't know If any of that makes sense an I'm sorry if I've said anything wrong or out of place, just thinking out loud. Would there be an opportunity for you both to have counselling together or even some kind of mediation so that you both can get some things off your chest in a semi controlled environment?? Again, just a thought. 

[Neil_1]

Dear Shay

Firstly let me say that you don't have to say sorry for anything you wrote and I'm so pleased that you offered some good insight into the situation.  And wow, you hit the nail on the head with a few things you said.

In particular the gut wrenching part - yeah, all we (and I) wanted was for him to come out of the self-harming thing and to be "ok".  Nothing more, just ok would have been fine.  But the self harming thing seems to have been replaced with, I don't know, to me it honestly seems a hatred towards me.

To be honest on the holiday, there were so many instances of it, that it really got to me.  You've seen people before who give really evil looks and that they stare you down and if they had something in their hands, you'd think that they'd do something really nasty to you - well that's the kind of stuff I was subjected too.  I was also made to feel quite dumb on a number of occasions as well and yeah, you know, I even wrote in my diary on a couple of occasions that I just feel absolutely gutted.

Nothing Shay that you said sounded stupid at all - it was a great post and I thank you so much for it.  The people who looked after our home, a lovely young couple, they took Daffodil away and wrapped him in newspaper and put him in his Dad's deep freeze - to await what my daughter wanted to do.  We got him back on Saturday and had a little ceremony in the back yard and where we buried him, we went and bought some daffodils and planted those around where he now lies.  Always heart-breaking stuff, but it's going to be a lovely memory/momento for him.

Kind regards

Neil

[Stuck14]

I'm so sorry to hear how his behaviour has really hurt you to your core. I couldn't even begin to imagine what it feels like. Is it possible, an I hope I'm wrong, that the hate he is expressing to you an him making you feel dumb is maybe more about him an how he feels about himself and that because you are the loving an caring father that you so clearly are that your the first he lashes out at. Maybe he doesn't know how to express it in a healthy way an the way he's possibly feeling about himself is overwhelming him. Im probably completely off the mark an I'm so sorry if I've overstepped the mark. Your a fantastic father Neil an please don't ever think your not!! I wish there were more fathers out there like you, mine hasn't spoken to since the start of Jan. 

That was great what your house sitters did. An the ceremony an planting the daffodils is just fantastic. Something she will always have to remember him. It's is heartbreaking an I think we carry a little or alot of that with us for the rest of our lives.

Please take care Neil, an I hope your feeling better too 

[Stuck14]

I have another post that must still be going through the process of being published but I just wanted to add that maybe it might also be a hormonal thing with your son. I forget how old he is but for any teens, hormones are raging an maybe because your the only other man in the house he is challenging you to prove his manly hood or something. I don't know, just thoughts which aren't really any good sorry.