Social anxiety and work - HELP

[L_]

I am 17 and living with my family. I have had social anxiety for around 5 years now and my parents have just recently realised it. Ever since I was 15 my family has been pestering me to get a job as my family could do with some financial support. While I am more than happy to provide, I am unable to bring myself to do it. Just the thought of having to be around people and interact with them stresses me out. Even going out the front door to take the trash out is struggle. I know I may sound dramatic seeing as most of my generation is employeed, its just...I just can bring myself to do it.

Because of this, I help out as much as I can. Doing chores and taking care od my younger siblings are daily tasks for me. I do well in school and am a well behaved daughter. I never ask for anything as I know I should be buying it myself. Even so, this is not enough to satisfy my parents as well as my older sister. I am constantly called weak, lazy and useless because of this but I know it just because they are tired and need a break from working so much. Because of this I feel immense guilt and pressure. I feel as if I am a burden to my family, too weak-willed to suck it up and get a job.

And yes I know a counsellor or psychologist would be a great help but even that costs money and suggesting that to my parents will put a strain on money. I am also too scared to talk to other people and telling my family about this will result in degrading comments about how I am just weak and lazy. Having depression also does not help (btw I was diagnosed by a psychologist last year. My school referred me to them after I was not attending school for the reasons of dreppression and anxiety).

I understand that all they want is some help and I am at the age where I should be employed.

If any of you have any helpful suggestions or any comments at all it would be greatly appreciated!

[Quercus]

Hi L_ and welcome to the forums.

Reading your post I saw the absolute opposite of lazy or weak or useless. I saw someone who cares for their family and gives however they can (childcare and chores are work just unpaid work). I saw someone responsible and considerate (wanting to contribute, sacrificing medical care because of family finance). And I saw strength. It takes guts to be put down constantly and yet still have the strength to choose to understand why they are lashing out.

What you feel in regards to work is very 'normal' for so many people. Anxiety has a massive impact on how we are able to cope with employment. Often people who haven't experienced anxiety aren't able to understand why we feel as we do. It doesn't make you weak. It means your anxiety isn't managed well right now.

When you saw the psychologist before were you put on any medication? You're right when you said it would be good to see a medical professional. When anxiety affects you so severely it is important to seek help. Even a long appointment with a bulk billing GP might help. Especially if you choose one with an interest in mental health. Would your family accept this?

In the meantime finding work might mean thinking creatively. Can you think of any work you could do from home? As much as I loathe it ironing was always an option I considered along with data entry. Sometimes starting somewhere is helpful so you can gain confidence.

I hope above all that you can let the horrible comments wash off you because they are totally wrong.

Nat