Processing feelings and overthinking

[L0uise]

I find I go into a spiral and I struggle to get out of it. My thoughts go to the scariest scenarios sometimes and it makes me so scared of things to do with life and so fearful of what could happen. My mind goes a million miles and hour and i dont know how to calm it. My weight has shot up so quickly because I go quiet and numb and find it easier to shut off from the world then deal with talking about it. i also struggle to talk about it because i feel people will think its silly or im being to dramatic that i become fearful to share things. My fiance is amazing and does try hard to keep me talking but i feel so bad because i shut him out sometimes and become irritated and closed off. I do not have any self love for myself and when i look in the mirror i just see something gross. its such a horrible feeling. I get married in a few months and i just want to feel happy about myself. 

How do you all process this and how do you manage and deal with it?

[Sophie_M]

Hi L0uise,
 
Thank you for your post to the forums and for sharing with us how you are feeling right now. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding, it's an exciting time for you but also one where it's understandable to be feeling more anxious. We are sorry to hear you are dealing with overthinking, it can be incredibly exhausting when your mind begins to spiral, please know you are not alone with these feelings. 
 
Please know that the Beyond Blue counsellors are here for you as well, and you can call us on 1300 22 4636 any time if you feel like talking it through. Another option is sharing how you are feeling with your GP, often they are able to suggest local services that may be useful, it's good to have someone to touch base with who can also address any possible medical reasons that may be causing the anxiety. We’re sure we’ll hear from our lovely community here soon, but in the meantime here’s some resources and conversations on managing anxiety you might find interesting: 

• Some strategies for managing anxiety  
• This previous thread where community members shared some of their Beyond Blue’s anxiety management strategies 
   

Thanks again for posting here. Please be kind to yourself during this time, you're doing the best you can! It must have taken a lot of strength to share this, but you never know who will read this post and feel less alone in their own experience. 
 
Kind regards,  
Sophie M 

[Ranga-1]

L0uise, I know how you feel. Catastrophisation is an awful thing; it's like your mind is tormenting you and you have no control over it. I do the very same thing. 

Weddings are wonderful, but they are stressful. Is this contributing to your anxiety at all? There's an old show biz saying: "It'll be all right on the night". Tell yourself this and your wedding will go fine. Sometimes little things might not go to plan, but the overall day will be fine and you will feel the love and support of your guests when you and your fiance marry. You are loved by your fiance and your family and friends. Knowing this makes you beautiful. 

Can you tell the anxiety to go away? It WILL be okay. The anxiety is an annoying teasing bully, but you have the power to tell it something like: 'Begone, before someone drops a house on you!' (with apologies to fans of The Wizard of Oz!). 

You are loved and worthy of that love. You are brave to reach out. We are all here for you and your wedding will be great!

[L0uise]

Thank you very much for these lovely words! Ranga-1 it means so much to me! the biggest stress from my wedding unfortunately is my own mind and it telling me negative things and that I am annoying etc and that i shouldnt burden my closest people with my issues because they will think im stupid.. even though i know they dont think that! I have had several other things happen that have caused my anxiety to spike as well. I have a lovely relationship with my GP and she takes alot of time to work with me. I have also started counselling to deal with some of my traumas that trigger my anxiety as well as my self loathing of myself. its nice to feel a sense of community and that there are others that go through what I am. This was one of the biggest things i have done by sharing my feelings on a forum but it has been very good! it was good to just write it out and get it off my head!