New Here and really need to vent.

[CarolynJ]

Hello all,
Sorry but I really need somewhere to vent before I go completely insane.

I am subletting a room in my home to a lesbian couple (they have been here only 3 weeks) and they are already sending my anxiety off the charts.
They were told No pets and conned me into the dog staying (unless he caused a problem with my cats) I don't like dogs as they are noisy and messy and my Landlord doesn't like dogs either. They also brought their cat (which apparently was meant to live in their car) both animals are now occupying my outdoor entertaining area, along with Housemates boxes, bags, etc which they were told to store in the shed.

They drink all of my milk (I have purchased 18 litres in the last 3 weeks compared to their 6 litres) I only use milk in coffee, have eaten a 4 ltr tub of ice cream, polished off a box of breakfast cereal that hadn't been opened, scratched 2 of my good non stick pans and asked for $60 off the rent last week so they wouldn't be short. I get home from work tonight and find out they have used my Xtra Virgin Olive oil mixed with vegetable oil to refill my deep fryer.

They have their own bedroom and use of the bathroom and toilet (I have an ensuite) but they have suitcases in the bathtub so even if I wanted to use it I can't.

I'm sick of them eating and drinking my food (they have bought some of their own and eaten all of that also) I have 2 fridges, I told them I cleared one out for them to use but they continue to use things from my fridge.

I can't afford to kick them out at present but I don't know how much more I can take. I can't eat or sleep properly due to anxiety and stress caused by housemates, work and losing my License for 6 months because of a DUI (stupid mistake, 1 drink too many and followed an intoxicated friend home)
I also have an undiagnosed medical issue which has been stressing me out for over 12 months. Specialist can't find a cause for muscle wastage in my right hand Thumb after numerous tests.

I get the shakes, feel nauseous and have difficulty getting to sleep but wake before 6am.

What can I do to try and calm my stress and anxiety, I don't want to go back on medication

Thanks for any assistance. 😕

[aphrodite15]

Geeeeeez you poor thing! I'm so sorry. The only thing you can do is put your foot down I'm afraid. But it has to be done in the correct assertive but still friendly way, which is a tough balance by the way. I'm sorry about the pets issue I am a little sensitive to it because I rent and have pets and I have a hard time finding landlords who are understanding. But then again my animals are extremely clean and well trained and I wouldn't choose to live in a rental property that doesn't allow them in the first place. I'm sorry but they've disrespected your rules and you need to set out some guidelines again and explain what they mean to u and the reasons why. 

good luck xx

[geoff]

dear Carolyn, it seems as though you're 'caught between a rock and a hard place', because the extra assistance financially would be great, but you're now in a situation where it's nothing like what you ever expected.

Sub-letting is an awful gamble,I tried it once but the guy was a druggie and stole many of my tools, my he went though all my files when I as in hospital recovering from a seizure.

If it was me I would have no option but tell them to go, otherwise it will only get worse, and if you have an inspection like all rental properties have to have, then your landlord won't be happy to know that there are dogs on his property.

Can I ask if the real estate have been told about you subletting the room, and I only say this because it could cause some problems and please I mean no harm to you.

These two ladies have to be told to go, and it wouldn't be too hard to re-let it to someone else. Geoff. x

[White_Rose]

Dear Caroline

I agree with the others, you need to throw them out. People who who are this disrespectful as soon as they move in will never change. If two people cannot afford to pay the rent of one room and you reduce the rent, even for one week, they will continue to abuse you and see you as a financial source

A couple of practical suggestion. Put a lock on your fridge. Painful I know but sends a strong message. Remove their suitcases from the bath and place them in their room. When/if they complain, remind them of the rental conditions. Tell them the cat must live in the car as they promised or you will take it to the pound. Your rooms are for you, not their animals.  And I also love animals but this is not the point. Give them a bill for new saucepans. Did you agree they could use your appliances? Tell them to put the 'stuff' in the shed immediately or it will be thrown out. Alternatively, if individual items are not heavy, throw their stuff in the shed yourself and tell them it can only be kept in the shed or their room. They are not paying rent to use your home as a storage facility.

Finding new tenants is easier than the stress caused by these selfish and self-centred people. I understand this will be hard but no amount of rent will compensate you for the disruption of your life, particularly when you have your own problems.

Mary

[CarolynJ]

Hi Geoff,
Thanks for the reply. I don't rent through an Agent, My Landlord is a friend who bought the house for me to live in when I had to move out of the previous rental. I have 2 cats and my Landlord knows this, he also gave me permission to rent out a room or 2 as I am in a 4 bedroom and it's just my 17 yr old son and I here.

I spoke to them after I got home from work today and told them they need to buy their own milk, cordial, ice cream etc as I cannot afford to keep buying these things when I am not using them.

Carolyn

[CarolynJ]

Hello Rose,
Thank you for your comment.

I have 2 fridges, they were told they could use one but they continue to help themselves to the milk in mine and to my freezer. I have told them they can use herbs and spices in the pantry and they are welcome to eat the bread (I work in a bakery so get it free)
I don't know if they own their own cutlery/crockery and even if they did I have no room in the cupboards for their belongings.

I spoke with them today after I got home from work so hopefully they will now replace things they have used, like they said they would.

 I just needed to vent about it all as it was starting to really get to me and  guess I needed to get the courage to say something. I didn't want to say anything while I was so angry though and this has helped get it off my chest.
Carolyn

[White_Rose]

Hello Carolyn

You have far more self control than me. I think I would have just blasted right in before I got my thoughts together. It's easier to put a lock on your fridge if they keep using your goodies rather than keep telling them. They will get the message immediately rather than you keep on at them.  And while they can get away with it will continue to do so. If they do eat your food, just add the cost to their rent.

I sound a bit vindictive about this I think, but it really annoys me when people take advantage of other folk. Do you provide any of their food?

Anyway, you seem to be getting on top of things and I hope all the other difficulties in your life will soon be under control.

Mary

[CarolynJ]

Definitely not getting on top of things :'(

I have just been informed by my GP that I have to start IViG Treatment for suspected (MMN) Multifocal Motor Neuropathy Disease. This disease has no cure and is slowly progressive, I already have muscle atrophy in my right hand which means I have difficulty performing everyday tasks. This pending diagnoses has elevated my stress and anxiety levels to the point where I am having trouble eating.

I have started taking anti-depressant Tablets again in the hopes they will help but I am really not coping well at all. I am taking multivitamins to try and keep my body nourished. I'm scared about side effects when I start treatment, I'm scared that my condition might disable me completely and that I will need a carer. I don't know if I will have a job in the New Year or if I will get a disability support pension for my disease.