Just need someone to talk to after having an argument with someone

[Booklover17]

Hi everyone,

I just really need to talk to someone. I had an argument via text last night because my friend didn’t respond to my texts for 2 1/2 weeks. She is upset and angry because she thinks I assumed she was ignoring me (she apparently had a lot of issues going on I didn’t know about). I guess my anxious brain kicked in big time but I can’t help it - I did assume she didn’t want to talk to me. Anyway, today I an just feeling really emotional and sad. Every little thing is really getting to me. Thank you for reading.

[Tay100]

Hi Booklover17

I'm sorry to hear that you are sitting in a tough space right now, conflict with friends can be frustrating and distressing. I hope you and your friend find a resolution- if you'd like to talk more about what happened, feel free to do so here, we are here to listen.

In the meantime, it sounds like your mood is low as you say every little thing is upsetting you. Please know that's a natural response- acknowledge it for what it is and know that with time you will feel more stable. Some self-care might help you focus on you and not the conflict at hand. Something that gets you out of your head (and not thinking about the fight) like exercise, stretching or breathe work might help. Let us know how you go.

Sending kindness,

Tay100

[Booklover17]

Hi Tay100,

Thank you for your kind reply. It’s very distressing. We have been good friends and haven’t had a fight before. I am so hurt by it. Not sure what to do. I’ll try distracting myself.

Thank you very much for your suggestions.

[SapereAude]

Hi Booklover,

Sorry to hear you had an argument with a friend. Thanks for sharing your feelings. Have you texted your friend back to apologise and then ask her if you can give her a call and have a chat/Facetime? Perhaps a quick sorry will help expedite the mending. I'd also recommend you find a nice book or go for a walk or do something you enjoy doing to take your mind off things if she isn't ready to chat.

Good luck with it all and take care.

[Jesicca]

Hi Booklover17,

I know it's scary when you have your first fight with a friend, I have been there before and felt very uneasy about it for days. The best thing to do is to let your friend know what you have been feeling. You could let her know that you felt anxious and worried that she didn't want to talk to you. You could then mention that you miss her and you are sorry that you went so long without talking. If restrictions have eased where you live you could even mention catching up for a walk or to get some breakfast or an afternoon dessert date?

It's okay that you are just feeling really emotional. Thank you for taking the time to post on the forums, I hope you are feeling better today. If you are still a bit anxious until you are able to catch up with your friend I recommend scheduling in some "me time". Maybe have a bath, watch a movie, do some cooking or eat some dessert! It's important to give yourself love too.

[Booklover17]

Hi SapereAude,

Thank you for your kind message. We texted a lot last night and it only got us both angry and upset unfortunately. She can’t understand why I think she was ignoring me. She believes she wasn’t because she had her own issues going on and I think it’s still her ignoring me because of the time that passed so we have reached a stalemate. I am just going to focus on me for a few days.

[Booklover17]

Hi Jessica,

Thank you for your kind message. Thank you for the suggestions - I have told her all of this but to no avail. I will try to put it out of my mind for a few days and focus on myself. Thank you for all your suggestions. I get the physical chest hurting when I feel this anxious so trying to focus on improving that at the moment.

[quirkywords]

Book lover,

t is so easy to misunderstand on text or emails. Is there anyway you can have a quick chat on the phone or talk in person if that's possible.

You have been given other helpful suggestions.

I find with text misunderstandings, If you say sorry you were unware of what she was coping with, then resume to your normal conversation.

[Tay100]

Hi Booklover17

No worries at all, we are here to help and listen. If you'd like any more advice please let us know, there are some great suggestions here

Sending kindness,

Tay100