I really need advice. It’s all too much.

[Tori_nawec]

It’s a long read.. but I’d appreciate anyone’s help.

Two months ago, while at work, all of a sudden I felt so short of breath, my chest/shoulders were tight and my head was spinning. no history of mental illness or really no clue what an anxiety symptoms were, i thought i was dying. I left work immediately to try and sleep it off. It didn’t get any better, so off I went to the doctor with extremely high heart rate, and I couldn’t breathe. Emergency Room it was for me. I had two ecg’s, blood tests, chest X-ray, and left with discharge papers saying “Anxiety reaction” .. the first month was HORRIBLE. I laid in bed 24 hrs a day. I hardly ate. (Lost 10kgs) I was too fragile/scared to even walk down my stairs. It’s the worst thing I’ve been through being in constant fear if something will happen to you.

i saw a psychologist. currently 3 sessions in. She is helping me to come to terms with it all. But my symptoms are very on and off and it’s so hard to deal with. My main symptom that started all of this, was my shortness of breath and something I really can’t get over, in two months, my breathing is the same, and tbh it’s becoming normal to me to not be able to breathe

I genuinely feel like my shortness of breath gives me anxiety, and I almost get anxious about getting anxiety symptoms. Sounds a little dumb.

I went back to work today for three hours. It was a STRUGGLE. And has taken me all day to feel semi ok. My coping mechanism is literally to lay in bed.

Im trying to eat and sleep better, exercise more, but I just feel so OVERWHELMED when I’m around people. Like everything is going so fast around me but I’m just, there. The shops, work, around a lot of family at a time, I just wanna go home. (I live alone)

I just want to know if anyone has a similar story with their feelings and symptoms :

- shortness of breath/ tight chest when trying to inhale deep. It’s resulted in me having pain under my left collarbone/shoulder when I take a deep breath anytime now cos I feel like I’m trying to do it all the time but I can’t help it. I just have the urge.. my breathing is the main issue for my anxious feelings!! I feel like I want to break my collarbones just to get a deep breath sometimes. (calm breathing just doesn’t do it for me?)

- dizziness, blurry eyes, dry eyes, headaches, unmotivated, tired all the time, denial, feeling like something is medically wrong still. Can’t concentrate.

I’ve also been thinking about medicine.. Maybe it’ll help me get through the day.

[YellowPoppy]

Hi Tori,
Firstly welcome to the forums.
So awesome that you're reaching out.

Anxiety symptoms vary, I get the shortness of breath, I feel nauseas and I also feel anxiety about anxiety - I've noticed that that's a pretty common thing so it's not dumb, nothing you say here and nothing you feel is dumb. Please don't think that.

I often get overwhelmed being around people, when I'm in a good space I'm able to move past the feeling, sometimes I can get irritated about the people around me and when I'm at my worst I just want to cry and break down. Cause I can't understand how other people are living their lives so much easier than I am.

I know it would've been hard but good job getting to work. That's a pretty big deal.

Medication is definitely an option but I think you should consider going gp and getting a mental health plan to see a psychologist - if you haven't already.

Feel free to reach out again and hope this is hekpful

YP

[Tori_nawec]

Thanks for your reply, i really appreciate your input.

its hard not to feel so alone during these times. You said “I can’t understand why people are living their lives so much easier than I am” and it really resonates with me. Because I used to be one of those people that could do anything. But all has changed.. now it’s hard to me to see friends, family, grocery shop and even work.

I have already been to my GP and got a mental health plan, and I’m currently 3 sessions in with my psychologist.. no doubt I’m feeling slightly better, but I almost feel like I’m never going to be myself again and my breathing may stay this way.. I feel like I want to reset my brain sometimes.

[YellowPoppy]

Hey,

I'm glad I was of some help. But I want you to know that your reply has been so helpful to me!

Currently, I experience this fear that I won't get better or that my psychologist won't be able to help me.

I'm dropping out of my uni course cause I can't attend and the pressure of attending is too much.

I don't go out without my mum and im never without my mum or my boyfriend. But aside from that, I don't see friends or family. Seeing and speaking to strangers is difficult for me.

I want to reset my brain too, which I guess is what a psychologist is for.

It's nice to know I've been of some help, and it's even nicer that I can relate to you and you can relate to me.

YP

[Tori_nawec]

Wow, it’s just so relatable.. I’m glad my story could help you. I’m just a bit of a desperate gal trying to get some insight. haha.

I’m sorry you’re dealing with this, I know first hand how frustrating it is. 😞

i don’t study, but work is too much for me, and I currently rent alone so I’m needing to made a decision soon to move back home (my family causes anxiety and stress for me, my upbringing was stressful) and I really don’t want that.. I love them, but I feel like being alone is where I feel the most calm and safe. I guess I can’t live like this forever, though. I need to work and earn money, but it is so hard to not get so overwhelmingly anxious when I’m there, if I can’t handle being around people in general how am I supposed to deal with working..

I’d like to know what you do to relieve anxiety?

have you had any experience with medicine? It’s something I’m considering, since the typical mindfulness and grounding strategies work only to a certain extent with me before I’m in my head again.. but I’ve heard of bad side affects.

[YellowPoppy]

Not being able to be around people is why I'm leaving uni. Just the idea of meeting new people or teachers and trying to stay focused is paralysing and my chest tightens everytime I think about it.

I'm sorry you're family causes you stress and that you're stuck in such a hard predicament. I know I need my mum and partner around but they are postive and supportive influences.

I use mindfulness and grounding but sometimes its only a short relief.
I also use essential oils, one that I apply to pulse points and another that I inhale, both are to levitate stress. I also use lavender oil. And its a bit hippy but I use something called emergency (Australian Bush flower remedy) or another called rescue, which is a bachflower remedy (European) it has actual benefits but for me the strong flavour brings me out of my head. (they contain a small amount of alcohol as a preservative

[YellowPoppy]

Aside from those, I'm increasing exercise, which my mum keeps up my motivation. And my diet, I've cut out sugar, wheat products, milk and I've increased veggies both fresh and cooked.

I was on medication 7 yrs ago for depression but during that time I was not seeking professional support and I was a second hand victim of a crime. So my experience of medication has multiple factors to consider

A week and a half ago i was having anxiety attacks 10 or more times a day, I was struggling even more with seeing a way out and I was paralysed with fear allot of the day. Since then I have managed to feel a bit better everyday and although I still can't go out on my own I am managing it with my mum and I don't get as over whelmed.

I am not adverse to medication, but I am wanting to put in a fair effort of other methods before I give that a go.

I don't know if any of my remedies will help you but they do help me. And I bring them everywhere.

[Tori_nawec]

Exactly how I feel about work.. because I just KNOW how I will feel being there..

i have heard of using essential oils, I also use lavender.. and actually purchased a anxiety relief inhaler made from essential oils from eBay and it’s pretty nice. I will definitely have a look into the ones you mentioned.

ive heard exercising and diet is major. Some weeks I walk everyday and eat super healthy. The next week I don’t leave my bed. It’s hard to keep up motivation..

i know how you feel. Although I feel like I’m stuck in anxiety attack. My feelings don’t really climax to a panic attack often. But I more so feel like I’m CONSTANTLY in a state of anxiety. It’s strange.

thanks for your experience. I may talk to my pysch/gp what they think about medication. It’s not an option I really want to be on, but if it helps me to go to work and earn money.. I guess sometimes you do what you have to do.

[YellowPoppy]

I understand not wanting to be on medications. And I am not against or for because I believe that what works for one person isn't going to work for another. So medication I believe is a choice. And it's neither bad nor good. I guess you could right up a list of pros and cons and take it to your next pysch appointment to go over it

I'm. Fairly certain that in the first week of this if I hadn't have had my mum pushing me to walk I would have stayed in bed all day too. I wish i could provide you with something to keep you motivated.

I'm glad I've been helpful and please keep me updated on how your going - if you want to.

If I think of anything else that can help I'll let you know

[YellowPoppy]

Hi Tori,
Just wondering how your going?
Hope your doing well!

YP