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I’m lost

To_much
Community Member

Hi this is all completely new to me but after stopping my bad habits and realising the state of my mental health I’m just lost

I never really knew the affect of anxiety till it hit me like a truck I can’t leave the house I think the worlds against me the odds arnt in my favour growing up I was always the talkative one I was always the one to talk to new people start conversations have a laugh like they say

but these days I can’t even talk to my girl with out feeling like somethings not right I can’t hold a conversation longer than couple minutes I start getting light headed tunnel vision racing heart and I’ve accepted it but it’s taking a toll on my family

I feel like I’m just a burden to everybody there is days I can’t get out of bed there are days I just cry for hours and hours

just feeling like a complete LOST SOUL.
everyday is like a new day

I can’t remember the day before anything

I don’t know what to do

7 Replies 7

Aaronsis
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi To much

Welcome to the forum but mostly I feel like saying welcome to finding out about you. That is so wonderful that you have come to realise that you are in need of some extra help and that you are not feeling well. I am wondering if you have thought about seeking some support for your GP and to get some guidance on what the path looks like for you to start your journey to wellness?

Anxiety is such a powerful thing and as you can see has the ability to totally blind side you and to stop you from doing the things you love or even the things you do in a day, not to mention to debilitate you in your day that you are not able to function how you would like.

I am so sorry you have found yourself crying and feeling like a burden, can I say though that these feelings of being a burden are just the noise in your head, the thoughts creating untruth's for you. Thoughts are not real and they are sometimes not even right. You are not a burden and you matter so much, you are a person who is going through a rough time and who needs some support, and we can help with that too.

We are here to chat to and to sit with you through these times and to let you know that you are not alone, you are certainly no burden and that there are brighter days ahead, there really are.

You said you "dont know what to do", can I suggest an appointment with your GP and even if you are not able to speak or to feel like you know how to start a conversation you can write it down, put it on paper, even show this post here which sums up beautifully how you are feeling to the doctor, and they will take it from there.

I am really proud of you for reaching out today and for sharing how you are feeling.

I am so sorry things are hard for you at the moment but I would like to chat some more to you if you feel like it.

Hugs

Sarah

To_much
Community Member

Thankyou I appreciate it

took me a while to read this today I’m just feeling real low DIDNT know how to reply but I know I have to for my sake

I’ve been to the gp starting some anti depressants and I know like they say “you have to get worse before you get better”

your definitely right it did blind side me but I feel like I can’t let it I have a wife and 2 kids to be there for and have wonderful support wen I sit back and just reminisce on what led me here I see the signs started over 1.5 years ago and I always thought nah not me but after asking and reaching out for help I realise it’s so much more common than we think and we can all get threw it

my thing is I just feel like a failure letting this happen ( please like a said I’m very new to learning about all this ) I know I need help but as soon as I reach out my panic attacks literally ground me we’re I have stopped in the middle of the road driving thinking I was dying

I’ve started na meetings

but I would like to ask a question

how long does it take to learn how to deal with this and control it ?

I have broken down more in the last 3 weeks than I have in my whole life

Hi To much

It is wonderful to chat to you some more and I am so pleased to hear that you do have support in your GP and that you have started taking medication, I am sure that they have told you that it does take time to become effective, which I understand is very frustrating seeing that understandably you want this gone immediately.

I am not a professional and I am no doctor just a person who cares so I can give you my opinion on what I think and maybe that might help a little with regards to learning how to deal with it and how to control it. There will be things you have to put in place to help you through times when you are panic struck however what works for one person does not work for another, so finding things that bring you calm, can ground you and can bring you back to the present time will be what you need to discover. It may be music, it may be writing, it could be exercise or finding a friend to call or watching a movie...I think you see what I am saying here. I think also listening to your body and taking note of situations or moments so you can start to see patterns and maybe understand what situations or things trigger you, so you can prepare and can manage these situations.

I hear you say that you have great people around you and that is wonderful. I just want to mention though that not everyone around you is in a position to support you, and that is totally fine, so sometimes we think we have all these supports around but infact they are just good people, but not people who we can share our feelings and thoughts with, which is sometimes what is needed.

You are no failure and you did not "let this happen", ill mental health is not chosen or selected, it appears to whomever, whenever, you have not brought this on yourself or caused this. You are very right, you are most certainly not the only one and you are most certainly not alone.

It might also be something to think about if these panic attacks happen alot while driving that you may choose another method of transport if that is possible as you want to remain safe and not put yourself or anyone else in the way of harm.

So as far as your question goes at to "how long does it take"...the answer is "as long as it takes", which also is very frustrating but that is the nature of the process.

Keep chatting and keep reaching out, I am so proud of you.

Hugs

Sarah

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

To much

I too wish to welcome you and agree with the suggestion Aaronsis .

I don’t like the word failure and try not to use it.

I see you as someone who is aware of his health and has insight and is prepared to ask for help.

That is a person who is willing to try their hardest even when not feeling well.

There are threads about how to cope with panic attacks. Everyone tries to mange them in their own way. I find keeping notes of when a panic attack happens what you were doing before what you did etc, you may see a pattern .

To_much
Community Member

Thankyou sooo much it’s good to talk to somebody the understands we’re I come from mental health is really not a subject

not many people to talk about that can relate or the will be willing to share there experiences

ive just accepted it’s all part of the journey took 3 attempts to realise that I need help but better late than never

Thankyou means a lot I mean it

Hi To much

I am really happy to hear that you feel like this is a space where you feel heard and also understood. It is hard to talk about not feeling right and to even get the words out let alone in the right order or so that they make any sense to anyone. I am so proud you have started here and sharing how you are feeling, as you can see there are so many others that are feeling very similar to you.

How are the meds going? I hope that they are starting to take effect and making some difference to how you are feeling.

I also wanted to mention to you something you said earlier and that "every day feels like a new day" ..I know you meant that in regards to it feeling like you are lost in your own life, but I would like to suggest that maybe this is a good thing in that you just never know what small things of good, of happiness and joy, or even a smile might come today, as it is a new day and there is always hope, always a sun rise and a moment that could make a difference to you.

Hugs to you and hope today is a good one for you.

Sarah

Guest_4643
Community Member

Hey To much, welcome to the forums.

I'm sorry to hear what you're going with, I and others can relate to it. We're all here for you. How are you going?

And you're not a burden. Take care.