I just got diagnosed with OCD

[DaffodilDarling]

Hi everyone,

I'm always a little nervous to post in these forums and haven't done so often so please bear with me. This week I received confirmation of what I had been suspecting for a few months-- I have OCD, 'Pure O' to be exact. I was expecting to feel relieved once I got this diagnosis, because I thought that once I knew what was going on, I could start working towards feeling better. But instead I felt the opposite? It kind of felt like this huge weight on my shoulders, like a big heavy label on my forehead that meant things would never be the same again, and I'd always be carrying the weight of my OCD with me. Did anyone else feel this way at first? I have great support from my family, but I'm struggling to explain it all to my partner. How do you tell someone about the awful, horrible, intrusive thoughts in your head without them looking at you differently? These thoughts go so against who I am and what I stand for as a person, that it's just so hard and embarrassing and terrible to explain.

Any advice or words of wisdom would be so appreciated!

Daffodil x

[Summer Rose]

Ah, Quirky. You are so kind! Thanks

[Petal22]

Thank you so much for your kind words ❤️

[Andre_P]

Hello. Just thought I’d say hi. To be honest, and this is only my opinion. Ocd at the extreme end has to be the most debilitating mental illness on the planet, hence forth what I deal with. Moderate ocd is fine to deal with. Don’t let it get out of hand. Treat it early, cbt or metacognitive therapy (which I’m just starting to learn) and if you must then meds (which ain’t for me).

it’s got to be the most cruel illness. Ocd can lead to insomnia, can lead to panic, can lead to mania, can lead to almost psychotic delusional paranoia (poor insight) and can actually lead to bouts of rapid depression with suicidal ideation.

I can’t stress it enough, look after your self. Kerb your rituals. I let mine get out of hand but I’m slowly pushing them back against the fence.

I’ve heard metacognitive therapy is really good for the phantom fears in our mind. Cbt erp may be good for more reasonable fears. Anyway I hope that helps.

Take care - also how you going Geoff. I understand your condition, it ain’t a fun condition to say the least.

anyway take care everyone 😊

[Andre_P]

I ordered a book online about metacognitive therapy. It works different than the ERP as it retains the way you perceive thoughts more so than exposure therapy to current fears.

adrian something I think his name is. Just google metacognitive therapy reading ay :))

[Andre_P]

Retrains** the way you

[geoff]

Hello Andre_P, thanks so much for asking and I would have to agree that this illness is a debilitating mental illness and those who don't have it can not understand the reason why we are forced to do these obsessions/compulsions and for them to say 'just stop doing it' has no foundation at all, it's not something we can just stop and if people try to, it only increases the intensity to do it.

If a person has received help then they need all the strength in themselves to try to relieve these symptoms but this depends on their level of anxiety, I'm not a doctor to make these comments, but I once asked my psychologist if they had seen a 'habit' I just did and they didn't only because I hide them from everybody.

Take care Andre_P.

Geoff.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Geoff and others reading

I really appreciate your honesty in saying OCD is a debilitating illness. I’m sorry that you’re struggling with it and hiding behaviours over a 60 year journey. You must be exhausted. Hugs to you.

My daughter is in the same boat. Been 10 years of constant effort to push it all the way out and then keep it out. But OCD is sneaky and when Covid arrived it found the cracks in her armour. It’s exhausting and chronic right now.

DaffodilDarling, the words and stories that Geoff, Andre and I share need to put in the context that everyone’s experience is different. People respond differently to different treatments. People have different levels of illness. People reach different levels of recovery.

None of us are doctors. We don’t know the best treatment for you but your doctors will. I can tell you that common treatments include Exposure Response and Prevention, CBT and Acceptance Commitment Therapy. Beyond Blue has helpful information on its website about engaging in treatment. And all of us can share tips and advice to help you on your journey.

As someone just starting to deal with this illness, I want you to know that there is hope for better days ahead.

Kind thoughts to you

[DaffodilDarling]

Hi everyone!

Just thought I'd check back in here and give you guys an update. Firstly though, I'd like to thank you all for sharing your stories and kindness with me, it truly has made a difference and made me feel less alone. Fortunately, I have a wonderful psychologist who, after some gentle goading, encouraged me to share some of my intrusive thoughts with both himself and my mum, and helped me find ways to combat them. I have to say that after I shared these thoughts, they got much smaller. No one thought I was a horrific person. No one judged me or blamed me or made me feel anything other than listened to and validated. And I shared some of the most awful themes of my thoughts, too. I feel very, very lucky to have been met with such understanding, and very thankful to have shared these thoughts after suffering alone for so long. I truly hope that others who have OCD can also be met with the same care.

And more good news! I seem to have found a medication that (so far) works well for me to combat my anxiety (I have dealt with anxiety for over a decade, and only just this year decided to try medication!). I have been on a new medication for about a month and I already feel a difference. With this medication and continued therapy, I am very optimistic about my recovery. Of course there will be bumps in the road as always, and there have been many already, but it's only been a few short weeks since I first posted on this forum and I already feel considerably better. Thank you all so much again for your time, I really appreciate it!

Love, Daffodil

[Petal22]

Hi DaffodilDarling,

Thats ok I’m glad that our support has helped you.

Thats fantastic news that you have found a way forward with your OCD… well done ..

You are very courageous and strong to have shared your intrusive thoughts with your psychologist and mum….. I’m so glad that you are being taught how to challenge these intrusive thoughts….

In my recovery with OCD I shared my intrusive thoughts with the professionals who helped me… and the ones close to me..it really does take strength to do this…..

I know that you are going to be strong enough to find your way through OCD just as I have done…

I also know how it feels to be struggling for so long with these intrusive thoughts alone…… it’s a very hard place to be in… scary

Is your psychologist aware of the vicious cycle that OCD is? If you ever need me to elaborate please tell me and I will.

Im so glad that you have found a medication that works for you.

Yes you will have bumps in the road but that’s ok OCD works on a sliding scale you will have good days and bad days but eventually the good days will out weigh the bad ones.

Thank you so much for letting us know how you are progressing im so glad you are feeling considerably better than the previous time you posted.

Please keep us updated and let me know if I can be more of assistance to you.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Daffodil

Thank you so very much for sharing your update.

Wow! Where to start? I’m so happy that you have made so much amazing progress and are off to a great start.

From my experience, the combination of medication and therapy is really strong. It sounds like you are on a good path for you. But remember, “two steps forward, one step back” is okay and often to be expected with OCD. You do you at your own pace.

I was so pleased to read that you have let your mum in to support you. When my daughter was in hospital with OCD I asked a nurse if she would ever get better and this beautiful woman said, “if you get the family stuff right, yes.”

My girl and I hung on to that and never let go. Believe me when I say, take all the family support you can get—it works.

Love, medication and therapy are all great things to have in your OCD management toolkit. This may sound corny, but I’m really proud of you.

Kind thoughts to you