I am getting overwhelmed

missmilford · ‎28-11-2013

I have suffered anxiety most of my adult life but the last couple of years has shown a marked increase. I don't believe I suffer depression although I know when the anxiety gets out of hand it leads me to that road. I seem to be in a particularly bad way right now, with manic and negative thoughts. I have dealt with a lot of change the last 2 years and it has not been easy, I feel stuck in my job being single with a mortgage and I am just so very tired of it. I don't see anything improving. A relationship that I wanted fizzled last year and it made me feel very down on myself and I just can't seem to bounce back or believe that my job situation will improve. I have been in my job for far too long but it is hard to see how I can get out of it right now. I am 49 and just overwhelmed right now with the difficulties that my job is going through and unsure if I can get out. My family and friends are used to me being up and down and it is hard to explain that this time it is different and I am not sure how to feel better. Any advice is much appreciated.

Jessie83 · ‎29-11-2013

I'm into taking drastic action, which always tends to be much easier than it feels. So, quit your job, sell your house, invest your money and move into cheaper rental accom ,preferably interstate. Change is better than a holiday! Go to the Dr and get some help. Phone a friend and tell them you are really struggling. I just quit my job and it feels rest: what's more, everything is going to be fine!

Pixie15 · ‎29-11-2013

Hi, Sorry you are suffering. It might help to go and see you doctor as Jessie83 already suggested in the previous post. There are ways to help with the negative thoughts but it is probably best to speak to a therapist. Everybody is different and from my experience some methods may make you worse instead of better. Also have you considered menopause and its effects? It is not uncommon for women to experience depression around this time. I find exercise helps. It also helps to have some positive goals. It can be hard to push yourself to keep going at times. I hope you find some help, Peace.

missmilford · ‎29-11-2013

thank you:) yes I have considered menopause but I had my hormone level tested last year and all was normal - I had a bad bout of this last year but this seems to be even worse. I think the worst thing is my almost obsessive thought process. Well no not almost, it is obsessive and I am just convincing myself of the worst scenario particularly in my work. I have started back at the gym but my enjoyment of exercise has certainly gone and this is due to tiredness. I guess when your mind works overtime so much, tiredness is natural. but I am definitely finding comfort in the knowledge that so many people have similar thought processes and I don't mean that in a nasty way. it's just comforting to know I am not alone. That is when I get to my worst, when I feel alone and isolated and overwhelmed. So thank you so much for your understanding

missmilford · ‎30-11-2013

I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that I need to do something drastic. I don't have the financial resources to quit work and have no partner to support me but selling my house and downsizing will cut down the pressure. A lot of my problem is feeling trapped and if I can simplify things that may help.

Pixie15 · ‎01-12-2013

Hi, feeling trapped may be part of your negative thinking process. Have you tried keeping a journal?

kiki · ‎03-12-2013

Hi

Something to consider ..you have a lot of thinking about things and it would seem that there is not so much concrete understanding of the situtiion. You say you feel unsure that you can get out of your job.

maybe it is time to start to get reality and truly know if that is the case. Maybe you could start making a plan to leave. Get your resume fixed up, start seeing what is on SEEK.com speak to a recruitment agency, get some advice, and then make a plan. I believe there is always choices and we only feel stuck when we don't see more than two options (stay and be miserable or quit and not be able to afford to live).

There are options, make a plan, know the facts and things won't seem so grim.

xx

Jessie83 · ‎05-12-2013

Yeah, lists are great! You could brainstorm what options you have (make sure they are mor than the 2 as Kiki mentioned above!)

Then write out he pro's and cons of each option. Hopefully one jumps put at you. SOmetimes it's just a leap of blind faith though. Have you thought about getting in housemates? That might be a less drastic way to ease the mortgage stress. Or sounds like it might be good to look at downsizing to a cute little cottage or apartment. Maybe you could also start looking into what's on the market at the moment? That way you will have a realistic idea of what you can afford. I love moving house/ making change. SO exciting. Let us know what you decide!!