How to Over Come Social Anxiety and Social Blushing **Advice Needed**

[Benji321]

Hi,

What advice to people have to overcome social phobia and social blushing.

I seem to blush and get nervous in every social situation where the pressure is on me.

I have seen a Psychiatrist and a psychologist with not much help or answers except a bunch of meds which don't help.

Has any one else been through something simular and work and how did you go about getting help or what techniques did you use.

This is really ruining my career and my life

I now tend to avoid social situations and meetings where I can.

Thanks all

[Missjay]

Hey Benji,

I have the exact same issue. It's embarrassing and makes me so self conscious. If anybody has any answers please let us know!

[LeeA18]

It could be a form of Rosacea. I’ve had it for about 20 years and, at times, I feel like it has ruined my life. There doesn’t seem to be a cure. I try not to go into situations that make me go red. This is hard. Even if I just see someone I know at the shops and they come up to me to say hi, I can go red. When I talked about my ex-boyfriend, I would go red. It’s a very strange condition. It might be easier for women, as we can wear a little bit of make up, but that doesn’t seem to stop it all the time.

[geoff]

Hi Benji and also Missjay, thank you both for joining the site.

Blushing may seem as though it's embarrassing but it's not, sometimes it shows affection and not to be taken as being afraid that others may interpret.

The worry and fear about blushing sets you up to blush more often and how you think others view it, this "convinces" you that blushing is awful, it's definitely not.

You may feel that people notice you blush so they think less of you, that's wrong, and you shouldn't think like this, because that's having a negative thought.

Social anxiety is a reason why you could blush, you're in an uncomfortable situation but what you shouldn't do is point out to people that 'you are embarrassed', that will only make it worse.

A psychologist may use cognitive therapy (CBT) to teach you how to learn to think and feel that you did once before, this also includes sweating arms, hands and your forehead.

If you blush, do not try to hide it or look down, remember this needs to be handled the way you feel comfortable and it also means that social anxiety has to be put under control.

Geoff.

[baet123]

Hey Benji and Missjay,

Welcome to the forums.

I would recommend exposure therapy. It worked for me! You are seeing the appropriate health professionals which is great. I had underlying confidence and self-esteem issues so making sure your open with your health professionals (although this can be scary and frightening) is important to grow and gain confidence.

Time is also a really important tool. It works in mysterious ways. Just keep working at it and it will get better. Find like minded people and/or people who experience what you experience and converse or even go out together and lean on each other for support.

If you don't mind sharing, what situations are making you blush? When you are in social situations with the opposite sex? People you are attracted to? If you prefer not to answer to us that is absolutely fine but enclosing this information may help your health professionals improve your condition and address possible underlying conditions.

Best of luck and keep fighting the good fight!

Baet123

[Benji321]

Hi Baet123

Thankyou for you reply. Yes I am only session 2 of 10 into therapy.

For me I don't think time is the tool because it has been happening for the past 9 years and I always thought I would grow out of it when I get into a professional job.

Now I feel like all the medication I have taken of the years has changed me for who I am, sometimes I just want to move far far away and forget everything, but I continue to fight hoping that things will one day get better.

Situations which make me blush started when I was the centre of attention in the classroom and was put on the spot and had everyone looking at me answering, then just to presentations, then group dinners, then all of a sudden it was almost over everything simple questions at work etc. The main thing is I will usually only blush to people who notice that I have blushed before and point it out, If I know certain people don't notice it I can avoid the blushing which is strange.