How to get help

[VG_]

Hi folks

I’ve written in before and found the advice extremely useful so I thought I’d ask for more if you wouldn’t mind sharing your wisdom!

I’m having anxiety at work in a high pressure new role (eg freezing up in meetings and struggling to present properly, anxiety leading up to meetings, trouble sleeping at night worrying about meetings!). Overall my performance is good, but its like I’m my own worst enemy and in key moments I struggle to express myself confidently! Previously I haven’t felt this way - only slight nerves.

I’ve tried lots of self help type techniques including those kindly recommended here, but it’s still really affecting me (ironically I was super depressed to learn I got promoted to this as a permanent role).

Do you think this is the kind of thing medication could help with? If so, would I go to a GP or psychologist or psychiatrist?

I hope you’re all coping OK during this time - I would really appreciate any pointers you may have. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this

[Soberlicious96]

Dear VG,

Well done for reaching out, again, and sharing your situation with us. It's always good to know that one is not alone in the journey called 'life'.

I too recently got promoted at work and last week, felt quite overwhelmed with it all. Just felt like I couldn't keep up. But these last couple of days, have been feeling better. It helps that things have quietened off a little. Gives me a bit of time to give attention to other tasks that I have been neglecting.

Perhaps you might find this page helpful: hhttps://www.beyondblue.org.au/personal-best/pillar/supporting-yourself/eight-ways-to-improve-your-me...

..... and having said that, I might even have a good look at that page for myself!

Also, perhaps you could also talk to your doctor to get a mental health plan, and maybe also consider talking to a counselor? Your doctor can generally give you a referral to a psychologist, as part of a mental health plan, I would think, yeah?

I noticed that you mentioned the word 'meetings' a number of times, and I am wondering; are you, or could you perhaps, putting enough into the preparation work, before going into the meetings? I've heard it said that preparation is the key, so maybe have a look at what sort of preparation you are doing for the meetings, and look at perhaps re-working your prep work, and/or asking for help with that area? Do you think that might help? Also, deep breaths. Always take at least 4 or 5 DEEP breaths before facing any kind of audience to talk to. And count to 5 for the in breath and 7 for the out breath.

And if that doesn't work, then just try picturing the men in pink tutu's and the women in heavy jousting armour! .... or something equally uncomfortable. That way you can remind yourself that discomfort is not something that is limited only to yourself! We all feel uncomfortable at one time or another, it's just that we don't always see it in others. We humans (I know I have, anyway) tend to compare our insides with other's outsides and come off second best because of what we perceive (see) in others, but feel in ourselves.

Anyway, I hope that helps a little? ..... and remember, take deep breaths.

Take care, I'll be thinking of you. xo

[VG_]

Thanks so much for your support I really appreciate it! And congratulations on the promotion!

I found your comment about the external vs internal perspective very helpful, because what seems like a huge failure to me (such as having a shaky voice or pausing for a few seconds as I’ve run out of breath) may not always be noticeable to others. I’m always highly critical of myself!

I had 3 big meetings today and I did have anxiety symptoms each time, but I’m not sure it was that obvious to others. Your advice about the deep breaths was helpful - sometimes I just find myself gasping for air.

My work is quite adversarial (I work for a government regulator) so I find the meetings to be highly stressful. I try to prepare but unfortunately my workload is so high it’s hard to be fully prepped for each meeting - I’m already working late nights and weekends!

Anyway I really appreciate your help and will have a look at that webpage!