hi everyone im currently on centrelink job seeker payment and unfortunately one of the requirements of receiving this welfare payment means i attend fortnightly job provider appointments. In the past few months ive transferred to up to 5 different ones. My most recent one was supportive on the first appointment but the proceeding two appointments he was putting alot of stress and pressure on me. Asking me personal questions that made me shut down completely and triggered my anxiety to the point I wanted to punch a wall and cry. It was really bad! What do i do!?
In August 2024 i got a job and quit on the second day. I was given "constructive" feedback which I interpreted as negative and its massively affected my self-confidence and self-esteem. Its also increased my anxiety x100. So now im fearful of attempting to look for another job. Sadly another factor is I'm struggling with massive social anxiety. I don't know how to function very well when it comes to dealing with people or communicating my needs. I generally get very anxious, and if triggered I shut down and go into "reflex" mode where I am defensive. For many reasons including PTSD, Trauma, Anxiety, Depression and personal circumstances. I dont know what to do.
I dont think I am an employable person and I feel I am a failure.
I'm constantly surrounded by negative people who never support me in the way I really need. They never once ask me - are you okay. Or how can we help you!?
I'm always being told - FIND A JOB. FIND A JOB. And I'm burnt out and exhausted.
I'm tired of looking for jobs, this recent bad employment has impacted me in ways I cannot discuss.
I dont know what to do.
