Eco anxiety in Perth

[Bookgirl]

Hi, we are in the middle of a horrible heatwave here and its causing me a lot of anxiety thinking about the future and generally just stressing out about it all.  Just seems so insurmountable and i feel overwhelmed.  My 15 year old son gets angry at me for being pessimistic but its hard to be optimistic when its over 40 degrees for a long time.  I just feel like i am sinking right now.

[Bookgirl]

My anxiety goes up and down. I look at the weather and its still warm for the next week and panic. I am trying to take it a day at a time which is all i can do due to my generally pessimistic mind set. I saw when i was doomscrolling yesterday that the april where WA had 40 degrees i didn't even notice because of covid and i was panicking and couldn't get out of bed because of that. I couldn't even remember any temperature when it had been truly horrible. I hadn't panicked (about that anyway. too busy panicking about everything else).  Its just exhausting as anyone with anxiety would know.  Sometimes i would just like to switch off my brain.

[Croix]

Dear Book Girl~

I can understand the feeling. When my mind is in overdrive with aniety consuming my thoughts the idea of switching off the brain -or at leat altering its course is mostly possible. I use a free smartphone app called Smiling Mind (I hope I'm not repeating something I've said before).

This has umpteen exercises to assist in mindfulness -the changing of one's thoughts to a different calmer condition. It's been used by the NSW Education Department and really works. It occupies me while I'm using it and I'm calmer afterwards.

There is a catch. although it has exercises for every person's abilities it does take practice. I have the attention span of a goldfish and had to find an exercise that reminded me often to bring my mind back to the task. I'm sure there will be one to suit you.

As I said the effects are not realy immediate the first time you use it, but the more you practice the more relief you can get.

I hope this can help

Croix

[Eagle Ray]

Dear Bookgirl,

Croix’s idea of the Smiling Mind app sounds like a really good idea. I also wonder, and I don’t know if this would work, whether immersing yourself in an interest would help. If your mind has a tendency to fixate, instead of intensely focusing on a negative, perhaps intensely focusing on a positive would help? For me I have a particular interest in photography. I watch photography YouTube channels, read photography-related articles and go out and do photography as much as I can. I spend time then processing the images afterwards which involves a lot of focus and high attention to detail. It really absorbs me in a positive way. I am diagnosed with anxiety, depression and cptsd, and photography is like the best antidote for all of those things. I just wonder if you found something you love doing, that creates a positive spark in you, it might do a lot to replace the negative focus you are getting caught in. Like replacing one kind of fixation with another that is more positive? Obviously with any fixation you don’t want it to take over from other important things. But just wondering if having something to really immerse yourself in in a positive sense may help?

All the best,

ER

[Bookgirl]

Had a bad panicky day today. The problem with going out in nature is that it reminds me about the climate and i panic. I used to write but when i am in this head space i can never get into it. I do read a lot which helps.  I am envious of my friends who just get on with their lives and have been planning holidays etc. I just cannot get positive enough to even think about that. I did manage to hold it together enough so that easter wasn't a complete disaster and my son didn't get angry that i had spoilt it again.  I try and be mindful. Sometimes i just fall off the wagon as i guess everyone does from time to time.  Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.

[Bookgirl]

Keep having bad panic attacks in the morning about this. Seems to have been 30 degrees for weeks with no change in sight. Just terrifies me. I don't know what to do or how to cope with this. Everyone else seems fine. I hate being like this. 

[Eagle Ray]

Hi Bookgirl,

One way of looking at it might be understanding your nervous system is caught in a loop in terms of how it is responding. So you are getting a hypervigilant response every time you wake up and it’s still sunny with about 30 degrees forecast. I was similar to you for a while with climate change and my nervous system was reacting to what it saw, heard, felt etc. I could feel the changes in the surrounding environment when I went out into nature. I still feel those changes now but I’ve reached a point of acceptance, that those changes are there. The acceptance has involved feelings of sadness but also a knowledge that I cannot single-handedly change things so I have to come to terms with the reality of change. I guess I could say I let my heart break open, felt the grief of certain impacts I was now witnessing and then my nervous system now accepts and understands without the strong reactions it had before.

I don’t know if this helps, but in 2020 I was diagnosed with a condition that progressively damages the liver. The initial prognosis I was given by the first liver specialist I saw was poor. I was told, and also read from the sources provided, that my liver would likely fail in 10-12 years and I’d need a liver transplant to stay alive. However, I decided to investigate further and the most recent literature advised differently. Recent medications can slow the progression of the disease and plenty of people with it these days don't get to the liver transplant stage.

What I am trying to say is there are no guarantees in life and change is the one constant we live with. I think accepting change as an inevitable component of existence makes life easier. Once you reach a point of acceptance the nervous system starts to calm down and realises it's not possible to completely control certain things. But we can still take actions within the limitations we have has an individual that help us along the way.

Last night I was watching the film Western Stars which is a concert in a barn performed by Bruce Springsteen of songs that are like a meditative reflection on the wisdom he has gained through life experience. Between each song he reflects on some aspect of life and what he has learned from it. To quote him from the film trailer:

Life's mysteries remain and deepen

Its answers unresolved

So you walk on through the dark

Because that's where the next morning is

Sometimes, in fact often, we don't have answers. Our questions lead to more questions. Changes are happening because of climate change, but we won't know the full picture of future impacts until they happen so we can only act as wisely as we can in the present. That is the very best we can do. I don't know what will happen with my liver, but I cannot live life with an ever-present fear that it might fail, and if I do live like that it undoubtedly puts my health more at risk and does not help me in any kind of positive way. I have to value this moment now and find meaning and peace in it. I'm learning an important life skill is letting go of striving to control things which can include ruminating over the same things. Rumination tends to dig a rut by making the same synapses in the brain fire over and over again. So there are some things I need to accept as bigger than me, things that aren't going to necessarily resolve and where change will inevitably occur. But life will continue and I can just do my best to live a meaningful life for me and the important people in my life.

If you can reach a point of accepting change and that some things cannot be totally resolved, your nervous system that is fighting for that sense of control and resisting change begins to let go. It's like you can breathe again and ease into reality. You are also then from that standpoint better equipped to see positive steps you can make going forward. I hope maybe that makes a bit of sense.

Take care,

ER

[Bookgirl]

Thank you for answering.  I am terrible in the morning but by the afternoon i calm down.  I read an article today about endurance and how this journo is writing about how people in Taiwan endured famine and war etc etc and life was about enduring. I need to learn to endure better. My son says so too. As i keep mentioning he is 15 going on 50.  He has his own mental health struggles but he keeps me going. He gets frustrated with me all the time but i am so thankful i have him by my side.  My husband helps but he's never had anxiety so doesn't' really understand.  I am so grateful for this forum. Everyone who answers keeps me going day to day.  I keep re reading posts like yours to help me. Thanks again.

[Eagle Ray]

Hi Bookgirl,

It is great you have that support from your son. Someone on another thread mentioned to me about a recent ABC article on the topic of endurance and the role of awe in sustaining us through times of difficulty. The article is by Julia Baird. If you google "ABC article awe enduring" you should be able to find it. Or google the title of the article, "Seven times down, eight times up: When life is hard, how do we go on?" Actually, now I've just looked at the article again I think it is the same one you have just read?

I do feel that life is often about enduring through challenges and accepting that that is the nature of survival. I often reflect on how often animals survive major challenges daily in the wild. We humans are very complex with our large brains and we can easily overthink. But I think that coming back to just the simple steps of survival and the present moment can really help. Just breaking things down into smaller, achievable components and then through that a kind of more positive future emerges. Of course challenges in life continue, but we also get wiser at knowing how to handle them.

Wishing you a happy day,

ER

[Bookgirl]

Yes that is the article i was talking about! Thanks again for the support.

[Bookgirl]

I read an article today that said scientists say we are in uncharted territory and they don't know why its so hot which has sent me into an absolute panic. I was coping this week until now. Now i will watch the weather especially in June in northern hemisphere to see if it gets worse or not. Just feel so depressed about it all. I just feel so depressed about the future.