Hi anonymousmouse
I'm wondering whether your mum's just spoken about downsizing, as opposed to leading you to see/visualise/imagine what that could look like. Do you think if you were to ask her what she imagines the place will look like, this might help put your mind at ease in some way? It's kind of like if you're left to imagine some tiny house with a couple of bedrooms and a caravan out the back in a yard paved with concrete, this would appear somewhat depressing. If she led you to imagine a house with a bedroom you could decorate in ways that you would love and with a lounge room that you could invite your friends into, this could be a start. Can you imagine how you'd help her decorate the lounge room in a way that would make everyone happy? Imagine a back yard, maybe with a pond or something like that, maybe somewhere where you could put a BBQ or a garden of your own or it could have a tree you could sit and read under (if you love reading). Perhaps you could ask her if she could buy one of those swinging chairs on a stand and maybe some garden ornaments that would make you happy. Perhaps the front yard is fenced off, acting as a 2nd yard with privacy. What could you put in that yard?
I've found that sometimes if I'm led to imagine the worst, I can't imagine anything else. Then someone may come along and give me a vision of something entirely different. Then I can begin to see things differently. What would your mum say in response to you asking 'Can we look at a few places over the year, to get an idea of the kind of place that would lead us to feel happy while downsizing?'. Maybe you could look at a few different kinds of caravans too. Some caravans are actually seriously impressive, perhaps far from what you'd imagine. Perhaps downsizing is your mum's way of managing finding somewhere to live while also being able to afford a lot of the things you love. If you lived in a bigger place, maybe she couldn't afford to take you out anywhere or buy things that would bring you joy.
Sometimes it's just not enough for people to say to us 'Don't worry, everything will be fine'. Sometimes we need to be led to see why we shouldn't be worried. Sometimes we need to be led to imagine what a difference looks like, one that could lead us to feel happy and not so worried. Maybe you could even end up leading your mum to imagine the kind of place she needs to be looking for, with 2 bedrooms and a yard, a place that will lead her to feel happy too. What do you imagine it would look like?
