Cannot Crack It

[sare_anxiety]

HI,  I have had two weeks now of anxiety, harm OCD intrusive thoughts and disorientation.  I don't know whether i am up down or sideways.  I have had my medication reviewed; seen my g.p.; been to the psychologist; got a referral for a Psychiatrist (scared of them); slept more; taken time off work; tried to get uni work done.

 Nothing is helping.  I am overwhelmed and fear loosing my mind.

 The thoughts i recognize as anxiety fueled intrusions but they are horrible and getting more out of control. I just want to find myself again and cope. But my anxiety never listens to what want, and it's bossing me around.

 Any help welcomed.

 sare

[The_Real_David_Charles]

Dear sare,

Are you living with someone ?  Can they support you ?   If the drama unfolds in a more dangerous way can you get to the Emergency Unit ?   

Medication can come back OK in blood testing but sometimes remain unaffective.  So your description of what is happening is really important for medical staff to consider helping you.   Anytime I am loosing my mind with a manic episode starting I am in the psych ward pronto.  These type of escalations need to be nipped in the bud before you lose your sense of perception or harm yourself.

Even if the person driving you to the hospital is nonplussed that it might be really important you should do what's best for you nevertheless.  A quick review at the psychiatric admission will either send you home with contacts or keep you in to get a balance on your life.  Maintainance is the key.  Hospitals see this kind of stuff all the time so you won't freak out.

A uni counsellor can organise extensions whilst your admitted or lying low.

Adios, David.

[geoff]

dear Sare, OCD and the control it has over us is so unbearable, and we can't seem to be able to explain to anybody what, how or why we do them, because they just don't understand that we seem to have two minds in our head.

It reminds me of an episode or cartoon of Fred Flinstone which maybe able to explain this illness, anyway Fred is standing there deciding on what to do, and on his right hand side there is the devil version of Fred telling him to do it, 'go on Fred no one will know, and on the other side is the angel Fred, telling him, 'it's not a good idea Fred because it's naughty so please don't do it'. So this is what happens to a person with OCD, and we decide to do our habits rituals, because the devil's mind says it has to do it, otherwise our anxiety will go through the roof.

I only wish that I could help you in stopping these intrusive thoughts, but maybe if you try doing an online course, and google 'online training for ocd' this may help you, and I truly hope so, but it's a continual exercise that needs to be done every day. Please reply back to me, as I know what it is doing to you. Geoff.

[sare_anxiety]

HI Geoff and David and BB,

I wanted to let you know i have finally cracked it!  this last episode lasted a long time and was exhausting. I ended up increasing my medication under the advice of my g.p. and while am still unfortunately on a higher dose ( not great due to weight gain),  am feeling better and today is surprisingly intrusive thought and anxiety free,  which is such as change from when we spoke.

Thank you for your support and to BB for the hotline ,  which i rang a number of times.

Its funny when things get better you feel a different kind of different i guess,  but can say today I have no SI and no conflict in my head and can finally just do my job and get on with life.  "exhale".

 Happy to be well and wanted you to know. 

Sare

[geoff]

dear sare_anxiety, this is the first post I have read this morning and what a great one to read, well done and congratulations.

Don't worry too much about the weight gain that can be addressed later, the most important part is that you are feeling so much better. Geoff.

[Chris_B]

Hi sare_anxiety,

Great to hear you've come out the other side and got such wonderful support from David, Geoff and the BB helpline.  I hope you can bookmark this thread and come back to it later if you start to doubt yourself again, it's written proof of how far you've come and what's possible.

all the best
CB

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Online Community Manager

[sare_anxiety]

Thanks Geoff. Will do. TAke care