anxiety back and worse

[JennaD]

I was first diagnosed at 16 weeks pregnant with my second child with pre natal anxiety and depression, I was then medicated and had been up until a month ago when I stopped taking it abruptly silly me hey! not the smartest thing to do after taking them for 5 years!

fast forward to almost 3 weeks ago when I had 3 panic attacks in the matter of 15 minutes went to the hospital to check everything and everything was fine.
I then knew i needed to get back on my medication . I've been back on my medication for about 2 weeks now and honestly feel worse then before had a doctors appointment yesterday and he upped my dosage. I know that will make my anxiety play up. I'm suffering from health anxiety as I now know cause I'm constantly thinking that I have cancer or a brain tumor or there's something seriously wrong also suffer panic disorder and depression, I'm constantly scared and crying over what I feel is nothing, have trouble sleeping cause I'm to scared to cause I'm scared I won't wake up, I live everyday scared that somethings gonna happen, I feel stupid to tell people what's wrong and how I feel cause I feel people just think I'm stupid and crazy.

I'm waiting to see a physc to help me threw and help me deal with everything. I'm at the stage in my medication I think where it's getting worse before it gets better Ive never cried so much in my life! I've been threw this before and came out better but unfortunately I stuffed up and relapsed but guess we learn from our mistakes hey!

it does make it better knowing I'm not the only one with these kind of symptoms and feelings! and I've learnt a lot from reading everyone's else's threads just wish we knew why anxiety makes us think the things we do and does what it does to us.

hopefully I can get better for my kids and partner.

[jaz28]

Hi JennaD,

I am so sorry you're going through this. As someone who has suffered anxiety in the past, since I was 9 - I'm here to tell you it does get better. You are not alone.

I still experience anxiety but nowhere near the extent as I used to. The thing that helped me the most was seeing a psychologist and doing therapy - I now have learnt skills that I need to manage my anxiety and I barely experience it anymore. It can get better.

My advice would be to try and hold out as much as you can until you see a psychologist. You will then learn skills to manage it well.

You will get better. If you feel distressed - contact Lifeline 13 11 14, or Beyondblue's hotline!

Stay strong,

Jaz.

[Sophia16]

Hi JennaD,

Anxiety can be tough 😞 and I'm really sorry you had to go through all of that. Please do not feel stupid about telling others how you feel. It is a courageous thing and is really empowering.

First of all, I'm so glad that you chose to go to a psychologist. They will definitely help you cope with what you are going through.

Our brains are wired for survival, not happiness. That is why it keeps bringing up negative emotions, worries about the future. It makes us overthink.

Here are a few strategies that can help you cope in the meantime:
⁃ Deep breathing exercises
⁃ Workout or go for a walk
⁃ Write down everything you feel. Every emotion, any thoughts.
⁃ Identify what triggers you
⁃ Meditation
⁃ Have a good diet

Hope this helps!

[JennaD]

when pregnant I was seeing a physiologist and she was amazing but stopped seeing her after I gave birth! and after birth and being on medication pretty much felt normal! and like I said cause I stopped so suddenly I relapsed and it's honestly been the worst time im constantly crying feeling anxious and having all these thoughts that I hate! I know I'll come out better soon but really hating all this 😢

[Pumpkinella]

I’m so sorry you are going through this right now Jenna, it all sounds really intense! At least you are aware it is temporary and that you have gotten through this before so it shows what a resilient person you already are.

I also have health anxiety. Once I thought every sensation in my body was cancer and I was so convinced of this I wouldn’t get off the couch. I am not sure if you are a googler of symptoms but not googling really helped me, because my eyes would go directly to the worst diagnosis that google could offer and google is not a doctor. Instead, I would just say to myself “if symptoms persist – see my doctor” and while I did end up seeing my doctor more often (lol), I was honest about my anxiety and they were so reassuring eventually I saw that this was in my mind and I could ignore sensations as normal bodily process. So resisting the google and being open with my doctors about anxiety and my symptoms really helped me.

Another thing that helped was to think of my body as always working towards healing (not as something that is trying to attack me) and to not interpret every sensation as an indication of danger. Our bodies have a whole lot of processes and as a result we can experience new sensations (or even old ones that you are suddenly aware of). Also, unfortunately anxiety does increase sensations like twinges in the chest and digestive issues and we tend to interpret those the wrong way. You may be able to talk to your psychologist about cognitive behavioural therapy for this specific health issue, to relearn how you interpret your bodily sensations.

I also wanted to say, don’t ever feel stupid or silly talking about how you feel. There is nothing crazy about you! I used to have a flight phobia and my psychologist said, its not about being ‘crazy’ or ‘irrational’ its just that you have learned associations that made sense to you at the time and now you just need to unlearn them. People do this ALL the time. If you have someone in your life that you know to be empathetic and understanding then its so good to talk to them. I always felt better after speaking with my mother.

You sound like a really resilient, wonderful person who loves her family. Remember not to be hard on yourself. I feel we anxiety heads are not kind enough to ourselves. Thanks for sharing your story, it really helped me as well because when I read about someone going through similar things to what I have, it makes me feel less alone. So thank you.

Love

Pumps

[JennaD]

I think the thing that really gets to me is the feeling of impending doom on and off everyday and just my thoughts, like I said I have trouble sleeping cause I'm scared I won't wake up and I just get a strong feeling of somethings gonna happen to me but obviously I know it won't. I just have so many fears and worries and it's really affecting me, like I said I think I'm at the stage with my medication that it's making it worse before making it better and my symptoms of panic are really affecting me to making my heart best fast and feeling dizzy feeling like I can't breath getting hot flushes and needing to go to the toilet and the feeling of impending doom like I said.

I feel like im not attached to my kids like I feel like I'm pushing them away cause I don't feel like myself.

I have an amazing support system from my parents to my partners parents and family I know I'm in the right steps to getting the help I need and I know everything will take time before it gets better but it's just hard. I wish no one had to go threw any of this I just want my brain and myself to feel normal.

thank you for your support 💕

[Petal22]

Hi Jenna,

Sorry you are going through all of this I know it’s very difficult to deal with along with being a mum at the same time…..

I experienced this aswell after the birth of my children…… ( I wasn’t taking medication at this time) my anxiety was very severe… I was also crying a lot, having panic attacks, hot flushes, having very intrusive thoughts that were constant I was always in a high state of anxiety….. it was horrible…….. I just didn’t feel myself at all and didn’t know what was wrong with me……. I saw my gp she explained it was anxiety and put me on a antidepressant ( I also had to wait it out for the medication to work) I also saw a clinical phycologist/ phyciatrist they diagnosed me with OCD…… ( this is something I was diagnosed with I’m not saying you have OCD) I did a 8 week group therapy for my OCD it was an intervention into my OCD……. I did metacognitive therapy….. it was the best thing I ever did for me it gave me the tools I needed to break free of the vicious cycle of OCD……. I have now recovered…..

I also experienced this condition with my health eg I’d obsess over my eyes thinking there was something wrong with it then I’d go to the doc have it checked be told it was ok but I’d still have anxiety over it and obsess….. I’d google symptoms as a compulsion and constantly seek reassurance as a compulsion…… I no longer do these things after therapy because I know how to disengage from my OCD cycle……

I had trouble sleeping aswell when I was going through my condition and always had the “ what if” questions….. I was very scared….

I understand aswell that when we start antidepressants they make us feel worse before they may us feel better….. hang in there ….. if things feel very distressing for you please go back to your gp and be around people…… I found being around people helped me….

I believe therapy and medication go hang in hand so you can learn skills also to manage your anxiety… have you done any therapy for your anxiety?

When you feel detached from your children it’s very difficult ….just try to hug them even if your anxiety is telling you otherwise…….. you sound like a great mum and resilient you will get through this…

I understand that you don’t want to feel like this I didn’t either I wouldn’t have wished it upon anyone…. But try to be positive tell yourself you are going to recover because you will….. things will get better it’s temporary…

here to chat

[JennaD]

I'm currently waiting to see someone to try help with helping to manage everything, and honestly this page has been so helpful and reassuring to me! I feel less silly about all my thoughts I know I've been threw this before but this time has hit me really hard I know I have the help and support from my partner and family which I appreciate more than anything, as I tell my partner I'm just scared of living in constant fear and panic and I do question myself why me and like you said I wouldn't wish this upon anyone!

i know it's a slow process but I know at the end I'll be better just wish it didn't take so long and be the way it is.

[Petal22]

That’s great you are going to see someone I’m sure they will be able to help you…..

Im so glad you have found our forum to be helpful, please chat to us anytime.

Im glad you don’t feel as silly about your thoughts by chatting to us…a lot of people go through mental health and it’s ok to talk about things you are thinking and feeling.

Thats great you have such a great support network..

I understand the second time it hit me was a lot harder then the first time….. I got through it and so will you…. Just hang in there give the ones close to you a hug I found this to be helpful……..

I know it’s not nice feeling scared and constant fear and panic I too felt this way……

Take it a day at a time, try to do something nice for yourself…

im here to chat