25 years with anxiety, panic attacks , and social phobia

[Termo]

I play a phasade most of my life,but behind it 10/10 anxiety to the point of chronic . I have taken myself to the hospital via either myself or ambulance so many times and each time feel a fool.

I have been on prescription medication for this and it's the biggest regret of my life. I even went to a private hospital to get off the horrible stuff and was told I would be given medication for 14 days and I would be cured . I tried TMS trans cranial magnetic stimulation Another 14 days in hospital Tried a private retreat . Have spent thousands and here I am still on my prescription meds and horrible anxiety. It’s eating me alive . Am I the only one?

[David35]

Don't feel a fool for seeking help. That's just your ego. I'm on anti-depressants and have been for the last 15 years or so since a diagnosis and they don't warn you come off them suddenly. Sometimes understanding the reason/cause of your anxiety can help alleviate it. For me, it's being unemployed (due to a head injury I sustained years ago) and the stigma associated with receiving Centrelink benefits. One thing I found that worked for me is trying not to concern yourself too much with what others think of you. I know I'm very self-conscious but the more I let go of my "outward appearance" the more I could concentrate on the things that do matter (mental well-being, physical health, family, finances, etc.) I read this book (bit colourful) called the "Subtle Art of Not Giving a **** by Mark Manson". He explains how our society worries so much about keeping up a facade, that they lose themselves in the process. It's not selfish to take care of yourself. Let me know if any of this resonates with you

[Al_KB]

I am new to anxiety and have no idea how to help, sorry.

Just want to say hang in there, and send you a virtual hug if that's your thing.

[Croix]

Dear Termo~

Welcome here to the Forum. I did look but cannot find your other post, sorry. When one has a long term illness, such as anxiety, it can be hard it treat, we both know that as I have similar.

You have made serious efforts to seek help but so far have not found the the sort that works. It is a tribute to your coping ability and strenght you have kept on trying.

If you feel foolish when you are in such a bad way you go to hospital in an ambulance, then the Emergency Department is not doing its job properly. Nobody goes to them when anxiety is not an overwhelming feeling, and for them to shrug it off is not giving you the specialized skill and attention needed.

Similarly if anyone promises that in two weeks you will be "cured" they are demonstrating a complete lack of knowledge of the problem.

If I look at my own history, which includes a severe anxiety state, there have been a lot of different things that all put together have improved my life until I enjoy it, am not frightened by my illness as I know under most conditions I can cope, and that I have accomplishment as well as give and receive love.

Part is not always wearing a mask, but talking over honestly how I feel with someone who understands and can give me perspective. In my case my partner. Perspective when I can only see the worst is important.

Part is trying to do the usual things to lead a healthy life, exercise, nutrition, sleep, accomplishment. Part doing things I enjoy and look forward too (in my case books and movies are a couple), and part being aware of stressors like the news or some people and avoiding them

Those are part of life. On top I have medical support that works, partly appropriate meds, partly confidence and trust in my psych. This did not come quickly but by trail and error over the years. I guess I ended up lucky.

All seem to me to be necessary.

Can you talk about your stressors or triggers? Can you mention things you enjoy?

It can come down at least in part to this, you are the one that steers your medical help, and while it is true some luck can be involved you try until someone 'clicks' and go from there.

May I ask if you have anyone in your life you do not need that mask with all the time, who listens when you speak frankly and cares? Facing all this alone when surrounded by others is very hard

I do hope you return and talk some more

Croix