struggling

[EJT]

Hi! I am F16 and recently have been experiencing some issues. I don't want to write long, boring paragraphs about how I feel and factors which may be affecting it so I'll sum it up in some dot points.

• I have been distancing myself from others a fair bit recently. Normally I am an energetic, bubbly and friendly person however I have become more quiet and reserved recently. Sometimes my old personality resurfaces for a few hours. When my friends ask what's wrong, usually I say I am tired. This is not completely a lie, as I will generally feel tired. This however is puzzling as I am receiving 8 & 1/2 hours of sleep a night.
• I feel very unmotivated, distracted and empty. Sometimes I feel as if I am simply existing, and the world is operating around me. This in turn also makes me feel quite lonely. My room is an absolute mess at the moment and I hate it, however I can't find the motivation to clean it.
• A few months ago we sold my house. We are renting at the moment, and in the process of finding a new house. This is very stressful and frustrating, as a few times now we have had our heart set on a house but we have unfortunately missed out on it. I just want to officially move. The process is so unbelievably tiring.
• I go through these really hyper, talkative and distracting moods in class where I quite literally can't get anything done. I am aware of when I go through them and it makes me upset because I know I am irritating my teacher and I want to be a good student and receive good grades, but I just physically can't bring myself to pay attention.
• I have been struggling to find the motivation to do my school work. If/when I start, I will generally not end up finishing it. It also takes me a long time to do work because I get distracted frequently and believe that most things I do aren't good enough, so I tend to re-read everything I have written after I make minor tweaks or write new sentences etc. (sorry I struggle to accurately describe it)
• Went vegetarian as of the 1st of January for ethical & environmental reasons. I have been taking B12 supplements and would like to start taking iron supplements to see if it helps with my lack of energy & sleepiness.
• Frequently have been getting stomach pains
• I get in these really obsessive moods/phases where I will obsessively research something e.g. today I researched getting a dog and calculated all the costs, did the research on the best products etc.

I would love to receive any advice or feedback possible! Thanks.

[eight]

i know this is going to sound like a shot in the dark but i was thinking to myself, aren't these symptoms of adhd?

like, the last point sticks out to me its hard to focus on work when im reading the top to bottom wikipedia page for a squaresoft video game that never got an english release or the only thought i can produce is about a movie i saw last week and it makes me vibrate at terminal velocity thinking about it. think the technical term for this is uh hyperfocus. hyperfix. word like that

i'd say a lot of the unmotivated points you've said And the part about having hyper episodes (especially the "i know its happening and i dont want it to happen but i can't stop it" part) feels very similar to what i go through too

have you asked anyone else about this, have you been able to get much of a full answer rather than "just focus lmao"? maybe the im-not-a-doctor preface shouldve came before this post and not in the second last paragraph but if you could bring your problems up with an adult or a doc they can give you more insight than i can

im just a combined type weirdo who may be projecting or overscoping too forcefully maybe not

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi EJT,

Thank you for your post. I'm really glad you decided to share what's been happening with you! It sounds like you've been going through a lot so I'm impressed you managed to summarise it in some dot points! There is definitely a lot happening at the moment.

In your post, you talked a bit about feeling distracted, empty, distanced and unmotivated. How long has this sort of stuff been going on? You also mentioned how you are renting now, and it makes me wonder if these two are related? Even though it might sound like 'just a house', it's very much a solid ground and base, so when we don't have that it can be really unsettling. If not, that's okay too of course - but it can help to think a little bit about when this might have started.

It also might be helpful to have a chat with the counsellor? We could talk for days trying to unpack all the things in your list but a counsellor is really going to be able to offer that support as well as advice without the slow posting back and forth! Is that something you've considered? Generally most schools have one, or there is Headspace/EHeadspace and Kids Help Line (for phone support).

Hopefully this helps a little. I am glad that you're here and just want to help you link in with other support too.

rt

[EJT]

Hey! Thanks so much for your reply and apologies for the late response.

I actually did bring this up with my mum a while ago with my mum (exhibiting symptoms of ADHD) because my friend and I noticed whilst we were researching the disorder that I displayed a lot of the symptoms. (Note: I am not about self-diagnosis or anything but the extent of the symptoms I displayed was pretty severe)

My concerns were kind of 'brushed off' and it was blamed on the spending too much time on technology etc.

I suppose it's why I struggle to voice my difficulties/concerns (regarding anything) with her/anyone else now? She invalidated them once before and who's to say she won't do it again. I'm not sure who else to tell? I find it really really difficult to tell people how I feel emotionally (I don't hold back in regards to anything else lol) and find myself contemplating it a lot but always refraining myself. I try to give little hints/cues but people tend not to pick up on it.

Once again- thank you for your response!

[EJT]

Hey rt, thanks for your response!

I've always been easily distracted, but as for the others I would say they're not so much related to 'renting' specifically but the whole moving-and-finding-a-house-to-buy process. Definitely a possibility, and a highly likely one at that.

In relation to talking with a counsellor; I would definitely like to talk with one since I find it difficult to discuss feelings & concerns with someone I have a relationship with. The thought of talking with a school counsellor however makes me really uncomfortable. I will look into the Headspace/EHeadspace counselling though!

Thanks for your time 🙂