Struggling at uni, stressing out, any advice?

[moonlights]

Hi everyone, this is my first time posting here.

I moved to uni about a year ago now with my boyfriend and I have had a really hard time. I got so stressed within the first session that I was breaking down crying and having panic attacks close to daily. I saw a counsellor for the first time when it got to that point and have been seeing the same counsellor consistently since then (she's lovely) where I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. I only have one friend I've made at uni but she's not in my course so I only see her sometimes. I hate not having friends and have tried my best to go out and meet people but I never seem to click with anyone. Most people in my course are a lot older than me so we don't really have anything in common.

I'm also not enjoying my course. I don't really have any interests/hobbies but I feel like that's because of my depression, I just don't want to do anything, I oversleep everyday and constantly feel terrible. I'm thinking of dropping out but that affects my accommodation because I need to be a student to stay there and I really do not want to move back home with my family. This whole situation is constantly stressing me out and I just feel so scared and alone. My bf has been very supportive of me and understands my mental health and is always trying to help me out but I feel like I'm being a burden by constantly venting to him about my stresses all the time since I don't really have any friends.

I know this is a long and confusing read but if you made it this far, thank you. I just want to be happy with life, it's a big ask I know. If anyone has any advice I'd really appreciate it. I'm going to see my counsellor next week to discuss everything with her & I've already discussed this with my bf but more advice would be lovely.

Cheers.

[white knight]

Hi and welcome

With you being so early in your uni journey my own opinion is to reassess your options. I'm not one for advocating continuing any efucation without 110% commitment to its duration and career choice.

Have you considered getting employment nearby uni then accommodation near your bf? Two part time jobs are sometimes beyter than one full time one for those woth MI. We then have variety and are not subjected to having the same people around us for long hours.

Then there is the possibility of returning to high education in a few years.

Depression and other illnesses can be life long. Although that seems daunting the best approach is to accept that possibility, deal with it and mould your life around it.

Communicate to others of a feather like here rather than endless talks with your bf. He has his own studies and pressure.

People with MI often dont have many friends. We dont fit in the circle, are betyer off anyway on the fringe.

Here is some threads you might benefit from. Use google

Beyondblue Topic be radical

Beyondblue Topic depression, a ship on the high seas

Beyondblue Topic depression and the timing of motivation

There are hundreds more.

TonyWK

[james1]

hello moonlights

Welcome to the forums, it is very nice to meet you. Good on you for having the courage to speak out not only to us, but even initially to your counsellor.

It sounds like you feel very trapped right now in your life. You don't enjoy your course, but you also need to study to be able to live away from your parents.

It is so hard to be trapped in a particular lifestyle you do not enjoy. It can very easily bring on depression as you seem to be feeling and then make it even harder to get out and meet new people who can perhaps offer an alternative.

I think speaking to your counsellor is certainly a good first step. They can help you think about your alternatives.

As TonyWK said, it may be possible to work and live away from your parents. Studying when you are mentally unwell is often very difficult and can make it harder to get back to feeling good again. Instead, if you are able to find some more personal time, you may find it easier to try a few different hobbies/activities and find one you like, and perhaps also make a friend or two. If your counsellor is a uni counsellor, they may even be able to speak to you about how to reduce the workload or defer uni for a little while. Otherwise, uni's often have student centres which can talk you through the options.

Anyway, hope to hear back from you. It'd be wonderful to keep chatting to you if you feel like it.

James