Please help me :(

[Immy-95]

Hi guys,

Everyday I have been feeling angry and sad about things which have happened to me. I am unable to focus on the present without thinking about stuff which has happened and I just can't let it go. I try to think about things which are going to happen in the future ( positive, friends, uni etc) but the massive cloud of negativity takes over. When I am speaking, sometimes I can get aggressive or defensive (according to parents) and I can't seem to talk in a calm manner.

Please help me 😞

Imogen.

[Zeal]

Hi Imogen,

Thanks for posting!

It sounds as though your strong emotions are preventing you from having calm and positive interactions with others, and is causing you distress and frustration. It is great that you are actively seeking help for this, and are willing to accept advice. Believe me, not all young people can post here and ask for help as honestly as you just did.

Making an appointment with a counsellor is a good idea. Counsellors don't just help people with mental health conditions. Confusing emotions, negativity, life stresses and other aspects of life can be discussed. This is where counsellors differ from psychologists. However, if the feeling of sadness has been happening for more than two months and bothers you more often than not, I recommend seeing your doctor (GP) about a referral to someone. Whether you book an appointment with a local counsellor straight up or see your GP first, you should be able to get the support you need.

If you'd like to have access to reliable online mental health info, I recommend these sites:

http://www.mindhealthconnect.org.au/

http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/resources/infopax.cfm?Info_ID=54 -this is about distress intolerance, and may or may not be relevant for you

It would be great to hear back from you 🙂

Best wishes,

Zeal

[MarkJT]

Imogen, well done for posting and asking some questions.

I would well recommend learning mindfulness. It is a type of meditation that allows you to be in the present and not worry about the future or the past.

I stare at the stars and clouds, listen intently to music, look at engineering feats...you can just about do it anywhere.

There are many apps that you can use to help you on this. I use Smiling Mind daily but there are many. If you jump into the app store and search mindfulness, have a look at the ones that are from reputable sources.

Many health clinics and the like run mindfulness courses. I first started learning it when i was in hospital with PTSD, depression and anxiety and have found mindfulness to be extremely valuable.

Cheers

Mark.

[SubduedBlues]

Hi Immy

Thanks for asking for help, I am certain that you will find some of the support you need here.

My son used to have a similar problem where he went from zero to furious in 0.2 seconds. For him, we just reminded him to "breathe" before answering. By this, I mean that we instructed him to completely exhale, and then fully inhale before attempting to respond to any and every question.

This simple exercise taught his mind to take pause and gather his thoughts before responding. It also allowed his body to adjust to the surge of adrenaline in his system and he'd be able to portray someone in calm control of himself (even when he was angry).

I cannot say that you'd have the same results, but I think its worth a try.

SB

[wantalife]

IMIM thinking their is so many reasons that are of impatience perhaps expectation of reply conditional prior interaction, best thing is you found this, are aware, and took the time to make mention and ask..... Some may go their entire life and never find an awareness of their behavior. (IF this is the case, at times we can focus so much on our own behavior we don't realize in fact it is quite normal) Seems something has pissed you off pretty full on at some stage, I hate it too if true. I smiled at a mirror once and realized I was not who I thought I was. Perception and behavior are a contrast in which you can adjust.

[1derwall]

Hey Imogen!

I do have a little first hand experience with the intense emotions that you are describing, it happens to a lot of us. One thing that really helps me is exercise! Especially in the mornings, I tend to go for a run or a walk as well as playing volleyball before school, it helps release any or all bottled up energy that I may have from the previous day, and I find myself being optimistic and refreshed for the whole day. This is a really positive habit in my opinion, and I personally enjoy listening to music and walking, especially when it's sunny, it definitely helps to diffuse any negative energy I might have. Exercise in general is very useful in building mental health and intelligence too.

As Mark previously suggested, practicing mindfulness is also a very great way to be in touch with your emotions, and even if you think it may be ineffective, I suggest you give it a go, even the first time I tried it was very beneficial, and not difficult at all.

Best Wishes xx

-1derwall