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I want to help my partner

Clyon
Community Member

I have been with my girlfriend for over a year now, living together for almost six months. She is the most beautiful person that everyone loves, and I treasure her dearly. Recently, though, she has told me she thinks she is suffering from depression and anxiety.

When our relationship started, she was amazing. She was so bubbly and affectionate. She made my day, every day. Lately she has been somewhat the opposite. She has moments when she is her old self, but then immediately changes character to something very hard to communicate with. Even questions like, "would you like a glass of water?" Are answered with a shrug of the shoulders.

I known it isn't her fault, and I am not trying to play the victim here, but I am concerned. Sometimes it feels like she has no affection toward me at all, and I can't help but feel I am doing something wrong all the time. Due to the frequent changes in her moods, I find myself second guessing everything I do.

I have read some posts online, and I know that a lot of her behaviour is the depression, but each day I feel less and less loved. It scares me. I want to help her in any way I can.

4 Replies 4

Fairywings
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey there glad you have reached out to us. It does sound to me as if ur beautiful gf is struggling with depression atm even a possible mood disorder given u speak of the frequent changes in her moods. I can empathize with you here bc i have bipolar and a mood disorder as well also married and have a beautiful baby boy. You r not doing anything wrong you need to be strong for her she is needing you the most right now. If you find her being distant disengagedtowards you that is the illness speaking that's what it does. Its a monster. I know u are concerned have you thought about taking her to a gp to have a chat she may require further assistance and possibly a referral to a psychologist or psyciatrist! Please come back to me venessa

Clyon
Community Member
I have discussed seeing a gp with her, but she is scared to go. The more I encourage it, the more scared she gets. I have been trying lately to just support any and everything that she thinks or feels, and there has been a slight difference. I still am caught off-guard sometimes, but it seems that she stays in a good mood a little longer now.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hi Clyon, the worry that you must have is so painful and one which you can not work out why she is behaving this way, but there is a reason why this is happening and although I'm not a doctor but have experienced depression myself for many years enduing all what it threw at me it could be that Venessa is correct.
Please remember that even though she displays these moods, it's not her fault nor is it any fault of yours, and the question of why she has suddenly got this condition, well I don't know why.
She must know that a doctor will be able to help her, and there is nothing for her to be scared of and perhaps you can go with her, but why don't you click onto 'Get Support' at the top of the page and scroll down to 'information resources' and order the printed material from BB, it's free but has a lot on explaining depression.
It's very good, so the more she knows about what is happening to her will hopefully encourage her to see her doctor.
Doctors handle depression everyday, so they will pick up what is going on with her.
Please get backto us. Geoff.

Fairywings
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Hey yes that's important if we push we loose maybe a female doctor might just help. she is very lucky to have you i know its hard on you but she will get thru this. One thing that may help is walks in the open fresh air along the beach hot showers relaxing hot baths that's how i got thru xx keeping a journal is fantastic if she is feeling a little uneasy about seeking help writing it down means she doesn't need to speak to anyone about it just yet. Please just monitor her if her moods are becoming quite orratic and frequent she just may need to go and seek assistance possibly even begin medication to help stabilize her so proud of you for sticking by her not many do let me tell you. 😊 thanks for coming back to me always here for a chat. Take care of eachother xx