Comedown Issues

[oscar0101]

This may sound minor but I wanted to get it out there,

Recently I have been experiencing extreme comedowns after enjoyable events in my life. Three events in particular have really impacted me.

1. A couple of years ago I went to visit my family in the UK for a few weeks on my own. This was a pretty monumental step for me, and I enjoyed it thoroughly. In fact, apart from coming home to see my direct relatives I had very little reason to want to return at all. After coming back I fell into deep depression for a good few months and struggled with returning to the boring school life I had left behind for three weeks. I'm sure everyone experiences post-holiday blues to some degree but it was to the point where I was crying in bed at night.

2. I entered a youth rock competition with my band and we did very well. It was a pretty large competition and certainly the largest crowd we have ever performed in front of. We performed our set almost perfectly and I came down from the stage in a state I can only describe as ecstasy. We also made friends with a couple of other acts. In the days following the competition I began to feel more and more depressed that it was over, that I would have to wait another year to enter again. Once again, this seriously impacted my life and made me feel unmotivated and directionless when starting new things.

3. Recently I attended my college band camp which I was sure I would not enjoy. Surprisingly, I made some great friends and had some great laughs. Unfortunately, all of these friends were from my school's sister school and It is highly likely I wont see most of them for another year. I enjoyed my time with them more than my regular friends and now that I am back I am starting to question whether I am in a productive relationship as well as feeling the same lack of motivation as before.

Once again, I know these sound minor but they are starting to ruin my mood in enjoyable situations. I often find myself consciously making an effort to enjoy certain events or feeling sad when they happen because 'I'll never experience this again'. I'm finding it extremely difficult to live in the moment and enjoy life as this feeling is beginning to dominate my life. Thankfully I am not on drugs, from this experience I think I would fall apart on them.

If you have any advice please let me know.

Thanks.

[Croix]

Dear Oscar0101~

I guess the first thing I ought to say is that 'post-vacation normalization' is a common thing and happens to very many people. It is not limited to vacations and can apply to any unusual and pleasurable event. I'm no psychologist so only have a very limited understanding however I believe it is something to do with the mind trying to find a balance to deal with normal life having been on the high of that last experience.

As far as I know some things to feel better include seeing those events as being part of a life-long set of experiences with in all probability more to come. To incorporate those experiences in everyday life, perhaps have a souvenir on your desk or wherever as a reminder. Perhaps to try to arrange a repeat or something similar. Surprisingly enough exercise can help too.

I would imagine your band can perform at other venues, and this can give great satisfaction, the people you met both at the competition and from your sister's school may keep in contact with you if you encourage it and your UK family will probably welcome more frequent talks.

I suggest you also give things time to settle down

Croix

[Holt372]

Hi.
I know this is an old post but I suffer from this constantly and am currently going through it.
I seem to be always looking forward to something. I feel like I'm wishing my life away. I absolutely love springtime and get really excited about Halloween and then Christmas but then once Christmas is over I feel depressed. Even though I'm still off work and my kids are here I am struggling to stay in the moment. We have booked to go away at the end of Jan so I'm really looking forward to that but then I know I'll be sad once it's over.
We go camping quite a lot so during summer I organise lots of trips over long weekends but I'm absolutely dreading winter. I know it's ridiculous because it's 6 months away buy I can't stop thinking about it. Last year we went to Bali and it was beautiful but this year we cant go because my niece is getting married in New Zealand in December so we need to save.
Also I don't want to spend the entire year looking forward to going away at the end of the year.
My life's really great and I have a great family and my job is great so why do I feel this way?
Sorry for the long rant but I really need to get this off my chest.
Thanks
Marie