Heya Brett,
Sorry to hear about the lockdown. Lockdowns certainly are tough as we're being shoved into an awkward situation where we can only learn to live with it rather than go against it. I read your previous post as well. You certainly sound like a very caring person.
I'm curious to know, just to get a better understanding, what is it that concerns you about disappointing your friends? From a friendship's point of view, true friends will accept you for who you are (regardless of the amount of interactions you have with them). Friends will put in the effort to socialize/hang out only if it's what they want, and not what they feel others should get out of you. Because we're responsible for our own happiness, and we learn to live alone while also learning to collaborate and work together with others. But I wonder if perhaps you had a bad experience with a friend that led you to being worried of disappointing your friends?
Would you alos like to talk more about what is it that you are angry and feeling unrest about with the whole covid thing? I personally find irresponsible riots/demonstrations to be irritating, especially to those who are doing their best to do the right thing, only for their efforts to be ruined thanks to some super spreader events. But I understand that people are tired and sick of lockdown, and covid has forced us to changing our "normal" ways to cope with the new way of living with covid. We're all flawed in many ways, and the best we can do is adapt/learn/live with the consequences.
I've been doing alright, been really busy with moving and work, so life feels quite productive lately. There are days where I do fall into spiraling thoughts about my past relationship, and my own issues. But having the BB Forums and a close friend of mine to talk about it safely, really helps a lot. Hope to hear from you again soon Brett!
Jt
