Struggling lately

[Hopestrength]

Hi, I'm new to this forum. I have an ex who is always causing stress in mine and my daughters life. My 8 year old is refusing to see him as I believe he is emotionally abusive to her now. We are in the process of getting her therapy. I have the introduction for her therapy session on Tuesday and I think that's why I'm so anxious. Her dad lies and therapists don't know if they should believe me or him, he's really good at putting on an act. If anyone can give me some tips, advice or even distractions I'd really appreciate it. I know its not a big deal the appointment because I'm telling the truth but it feels like I'm on trial so therapists can decide how to treat our situation and if they believe him then my daughter never gets the real support she needs! Thanks guys

[mmMekitty]

Hi Hopestrength,

Welcome to the forum. It's a sad & stressful time when parents split & there is a child feeling the strain, probably feeling she have to choose, & no matter who she does choose, she feels guilty,, having betrayed the other.

I don't know what custody arrangements you have, but since your daughter is so distressed she is refusing to see him, maybe you need to have thos custody arrangements changed, maybe even try to have full custody? Is that an option?

I hope that however you & your ex present yourselves, the therapist keeps your daughter's welfare foremost in their mind.

I'm not sure how much help I can be. My mother & father split when I was maybe not yet 4 years old, & later, when my father & step-mother split, I was 16-17 years old, & long overdue.

mmMekitty

mmMekitty

[Hopestrength]

Thank you for your reply. Yes I hope the therapist focuses only on helping my daughter. It's really hard though when he lies then my poor daughter doesn't get the treatment she needs and deserves! I'm feeling anxious because I just hope they believe me and not him so she gets the help she needs!

[missep123]

Hi Hopestrength,

I am so sorry to hear that you have been going through this.That would be a very stressful situation. I studied psychology for many years and have met many great psychologists and counsellors. I hope this gives you comfort but a good psychologist will often take into consideration body language and will really try to get to the root of everything. Sometimes they may want to speak to your child privately as well so they can understand their perspective also. I really hope you have a good session Hopestrength. Please keep us updated.

We are here for you

[Sophia16]

Hi,

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums and thank you for being open here. I can see how distressed and conflicted you are feeling. It must be so difficult going through that.

Just stay true to yourself and the therapist will believe you. Remember they are professionals so I am sure they know whether someone is lying or not. They have studied the human brain and emotions for most of their life.

Please stay safe and i am always here to support you.

[missep123]

Hi Hopestrength,

I just wanted to check in with you and see how you are doing!