Saying hello

[Mciaacp]

Hi, new to the forums - literally just signed up. 30 yo, cis she/hers.

I think I’m hoping to find people to talk to here. I feel pretty isolated and I feel I have a whole two people (my husband and one friend) I can talk to, but I don’t want to burden them anymore.

I think I have generalised anxiety disorder - I use “think” because my psychologist seemed reluctant to give me the diagnosis at the time, and I haven’t seen her in 6 months or so.

A lot of it seems to just be feelings of worthlessness, shame, lonely-but-also-hating-social-gatherings. And feeling trapped with commitments that I can’t say no to. And a whole lot of money-related anxiety.

[silencemaker]

Hi I'm new to here too.

I feel the same about not wanting to burden the close people. And I guess that caused me hating social gatherings despite of feeling lonely like you, as I have to pretend I'm totally find in front of others in order not to make them worry. It's really difficult isn't it?

I hope you find great help here. Hopefully there is someone similar to us and has better understanding of or even a solution to this feeling.

[Rabbit33]

Hi Mcaiaacp,

Thank you for reaching out. Please don't ever feel like a burden with us. We want you to be able to reach out for a chat, support or some information anytime of the day and hopefully we have someone available to respond to you asap.

It sounds like you're wanting to seek some support and it's great to come on here for a chat but have you tried speaking with you regular GP? Sometimes they're able to offer suitable resources, referrals to psychologists with mental health plans and may have some great connections into the community that could help you meet people?

Anxiety is a tricky one. It effects everyone differently, it comes on whenever it wants and creates a very yucky feeling inside. I'm so sorry that you're experiencing all these negative emotions.

Please know that you are not worthless, and that you are strong and worthy of love and happiness!

Hope you're feeling a bit better now. Feel free to chat again.

Sending you positive vibes 🙂

[Rabbit33]

Hi Silencemaker,

I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling so uneasy, lonely and anxious. Firstly, Thank you for reaching out to us, it takes strength to do so.

I understand the feeling of being or thinking you're becoming a burden on those you care about, but i'm sure you're loved ones don't feel or think that about you at all.
Have you tried speaking with your GP or have you got a psychologist you can speak with?
There are many different ways of working to reduce anxiety, including; Medication, Therapy etc.
Sometimes it's about taking little baby steps into unpleasant situations that cause us anxiety and working a way through that barrier to reduce the fear. But this would be something that you'd work very closely with your psychologist on, as they're very skilled in delivering these types of therapy.

Sometimes reading a book, watching a movie, or as you have done now, jumping online can help with the feeling lonely. - I hope you're feeling a bit better now and not so lonely!

Sending positive vibes your way! 🙂

[Mciaacp]

It’s great to know already I’m not the only one who’s feeling like this. Can totally relate, especially to pretending everything is okay. Hope to see you more on the forums 🙂

[Mciaacp]

Thanks Rabbit33. I think I’m technically on a mental health plan but I don’t know for sure. I was last year, and at the start of the year my psych said it rolled over but I didn’t have to do anything (she did, but I didn’t).

It’s just that, as it’s a rebate and not fully funded, I still don’t feel like I can afford sessions. And when I feel down I know what I’m supposed to be doing (breathing, exercise, focusing on what I can control, focusing on the senses/present moment). So going back felt like a waste of her time because, I’d feel bad, but I also knew it was because I hadn’t done the practice.

I’m hoping having a place to connect with others going through the same thing will help though, so thank you for reaching out

[Rabbit33]

That's good to hear that you've sorted out the mental health plan. It lasts for 12 months and you get a certain amount greatly discounted or in some cases even free.
It may be worth returning to your GP and ensuring you have another active mental health plan and referral in place?

Don't feel bad for thinking you 'may' be wasting your psychologists time. I can guarantee you that you are not wasting their time. I think that thought is part of the anxiety speaking. I get a bit like that also.
I sometimes write a whole bunch of things down (Almost like my own little report)
and then i take it in with me and hand it to my therapist, i find that it helps.

Have you ever done CBT with your psychologist? It could be worthwhile discussing it with them and seeing if that helps at all?

Another method, if you have a lot on your mind and find yourself stressing and over thinking. Try breaking down each problem, and once you've done this. Work through the easiest/smallest problem first and work your way through.
Even some self help books? I have a few of the 'Little book' series by; Tiddy Rowan. -
- Little Book of confidence
- Little Book of happiness
- Little Book of friendship'
They have some really good inspirational quotes inside.
Another one is;
"Staying on the path' by Dr Wayne W Dyer. - Filled with really great eye opening quotes also!
When i feel depressed or extremely anxious, these help keep me motivated, inspired and pushing on.

Another thing I enjoy and that calms me is - Astrology.
What star sign are you?
(I find that extremely reassuring and surprisingly very accurate)

Try new things and see if they work. You may be surprised.. Baby steps though, just take each day as it comes and know that you are worthy, you are strong and you deserve to be happy! 🙂