Relocation sadness

[little_flannel]

hello,

I am 38 female and 3 months ago moved to a remote community for a promotion and absolutely hate it and struggle to get up out of bed for work. I have worked for this company for 20  years 

I am sad all the time which means I am falling behind at work and because I am a leader my team are falling further behind and I know my mental health is now a liability for the business I work for.

I have an appointment with doctor on Monday to get mental health plan but feel like I need to relocate back home and put my mental health first 

Needing advice from people who have left their job due to mental health 
 

[Croix]

Dear Little_flannel~

Welcome. I know how you feel as it was how my illness started. Not enjoying work (which I used to do), losing efficiency, enthusiasm and even the ability to concentrate. Efficiency dropped and kept on dropping.

While I'm not suggesting this will necessarily happen to you I ended up unable to work at all, with depression, anxiety and other matters. So that job was lost anyway. I found I'd left things far too long and treatment took far longer than if I'd taken action more quickly.

While seeking medical advice is certainly an essential thing to do what other considerations are there?

Do you think going back where you came from will reduce these feelings?

After you have been wiht the same business for so long is there any possibility of your being posted into an area you would like - even if it meant a drop from your leadership role? Better to admit a mistake than have your health get worse.

Do you have any other thoughts?

I guess there are two things, the first is that no job is worth seriously damaging your mental health --there are other opportunities in the world

The second is not to repeat my mistake and stay in the same job until it became impossible, with all the problems in treatment and otherwise that caused. Even now while I"m in a pretty good state I'm still on medication and therapy.

You've  mentioned medical support, may I ask if you have any personal support to lean on, family or a friend you can talk frankly with who will listen and care?

If you would like to come back and talk some more we are here.

Croix

[little_flannel]

Thanks so much for your reply. I have family and friends that I can be honest with.

I know I need to quit as I think even if I side step into a different role in the company I will still feel like I failed and would rather start from fresh and try something new once I have time to recharge and work through things 

[Croix]

Dear Little_Flannel~

I'm glad you have people to support you, trying to copy by yourself is so hard.

From my own experience I know feelings of failure, I felt htem even before I was invalided out of my occupation, certainly felt them after, however I have come to believe those feelings are false and were a very negative influence on my capabilities and aspirations.

I guess we all like to be in control of our lives, and  feelings of failire when things do not pan out are a result - I don't know if the makes sense to you, I hope so.

If you had contracted diabetes  I don't think you would feel the same way, there are things life throws at you that you have to deal wiht as best you can, so if you have to take insulin for example you might do so life-long feeling it is a limitation on yur activities wiht enforced diet and exercise, but not something for which you are liable.

You developed an adverse reaction to your new circumstances, and that is unfortunate, however it was as a result of a perfectly natural move to advance yourself and broaden your experience and accomplishments. It is not a failure, it is simply something unexpected to learn from.

A fresh start might seem attractive at the moment and may indeed be the correct course of action, however you are making that decision while you are incapacitated by your illness and may even feel shame, as I did,  in you old organization's environment. While I don't know what is the right answer for you I do know 20 years experience is not something to lightly discard.

Croix