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Dear Maggierose~
Welcome here to the forum, as you say you have had a very bad year, and that on its own can leave its mark.
You mentioned infertility and 'ivy'. I cant find any reference to that and take it to mean IVF. My apologies if I've made a mistake. A close family member went though the IVF procedure for a couple of years. It was successful in the end , but getting there was not good. Regular checks and procedures, uncomfortable to say the least, plus a great deal of emotion packed in with it all.
Now if you have been going though all this, plus the death of two people you love and a chage of job to an unhappy one there is enough to make a person ill. Add again food intolerance and a husband who has the worry of a new business, as do you. Its a very great deal.
I read you were seeing a psychologist and had been having complimentary remedies as well. If you have not done so already Id suggest you go see a GP, and in a long consultation say all that has been happening. Then a complete checkup. Please do not omit the naturopath/kinesiologist remedies.
It may be that you are suffering a mental health condition due to all this stress, then again it might be a physical reaction to the IVF, either way a Doctor would be a good starting point.
I am sure either way you will get back to the person you were (unless you have a bub, in which case things will never be the same:)
Croix