Members new and old, introduce yourselves here

Chris_B · ‎01-07-2014

Hi everyone,

This is (what will hopefully become) a mega-thread for members, new and old, to introduce themselves. I'll kick off:

My name is Chris Banks and I’m the online communities manager at beyondblue. Basically, I’m here to help out, contribute to discussions, and answer any questions you may have about beyondblue. I work with a team of moderators behind-the-scenes who keep the forums running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I’m 37, originally from New Zealand, and have worked as a filmmaker, journalist, and musician. I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in the mental health sector too. I have lived experience of bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety, and have been living in Melbourne for nearly two years. In my spare time I enjoy movies, music, hanging out with mates, and I barrack for Hawthorn, much to the disgust of some of our regular members!

I’m not a psychologist or counsellor (although I have seen a fair few of them), so I can’t give medical advice. Like everyone else here, I can provide peer support only.
I really enjoy being part of the community and virtually meeting the many different people of all ages who come through everyday, even if they're not feeling the best when they arrive on the doorstep. Hopefully in your time here you'll feel less alone, and pick up some tips and encouragement for the journey.

(passes on the talking stick)

PLEASE NOTE: This thread is for introductions only, if you have an issue you would like to discuss ongoing with the community, please start a new thread with your topic in the appropriate section.

Mr_Redline · ‎13-05-2015

VERY Helpful!

Thanks very much!

Mandygee · ‎13-05-2015

Hi there

mum of three girls,23,21, and 9.

life been tough to say the least.emigrated to Aus 8 years ago and in that time,9 year old diagnosed autistic, had a brain tumour and 2 brain ops,middle child attempted suicide and eldest has social phobia/OCD,depression,anxiety and mood swings.....as well life's other curve balls like husband losing job, stretched financially, I need hip op as in constant pain, that's just a few of the issues we face.....sorry for the negativity, but just wanted to get it out there and see how we can get to a happier place.

im supporting everyone but myself have severe depression and hubby works away fly in/out,and isn't really hands on when he's around anyway.

i really came here to get advice on how to help my eldest who doesn't socialise at all(only with family).she has tried different meds to which dr says she is "resistant" and she is losing hope that her life will move forward.

any help appreciated, thanks

StrongerP · ‎13-05-2015

Hello everyone just joined forum my story is I have come from a marriage of 14 years and my partner was Narcissistic and it has been a very difficult 12 months. I had to go through the Court System with DVO proceedings for Emotional Abuse and protection for my Daughter and I. Which was way out of my comfort zone. When your partner represents himself in court it is very hard and my fear and anxiety levels through the roof!!! But with friends and family etc you get through it step by step. I have had so many curve balls thrown at me but step by step am becoming stronger am getting there but the worst for me is knowing how to deal with what my ex partner has inflicted on our daughter. We tried counselling but he only turned up for one and the second one he didn't turn up the next thing we heard was he had gone overseas and not coming back. I now have a daughter that is devastated she loves him and blames herself but at the same time knows he has issues and has been told this is not her fault, she is very mature for her age but has feelings of abandonment, misses her Daddy and is questioning herself on the "If I had of done this or that" she just would love to fix everything up. As a Mother this so breaks my heart. It is very hard emotionally to stay positive and up beat. I am suffering from insomnia and controlling my mind and thought patterns. There is a lot more cruel things that have happened over the year. The lies, manipulation, deceit, betrayal and lack of empathy, Financial abuse that happens with Narcissism is beyond comprehension to me. This is the first time I have spoken about this in a public forum is there anyone out there who has had to deal with this ???

pipsy · ‎14-05-2015

Hello,StrongerP. So sorry to learn about your problems with Narcissistic partner. The way you've explained it shows you are dealing with it the best way you can. Keep reiterating to your daughter that her father does love her. He does, that's the hardest part for her to understand. It is no-one's fault, not even your husbands. From what I've learned with this condition, narcissistics are usually victims of long term abuse from families, i.e mum/dad/siblings. They develop hard exteriors to keep from getting emotionally hurt. Unfortunately, unless this problem is recognized by themselves, the pattern of abuse carries on to their adult life, making any form of relationship almost impossible. They lash out because, to them attack is the best form of defence. Half the time, they really believe what they're saying. Deep down, he knows the damage he's caused, but his pride won't let him 'back down'. Backing down isn't in his vocabulary, because that's weakness. Any form of softness is weakness. It's a horrible, soul destroying condition. Hope I've been of some help. Be aware of any problems with your daughter. I've had to back away from in-laws because of this. My husband doesn't understand or admit to his parents treatment of me, making me having to make a life of my own. We're still together because I'm determined they're not going to destroy us. Be strong and supportive for your daughter. If you're unsure, there are books on the subject. If he was raised by foster/adopted parents with children of their own, he probably felt (in his mind) he had to fight harder for a place in their heart.

Skeddy · ‎16-05-2015

Hello,

This is my first post. I have recovered from severe post natal depression. My son is now 16 months old. I have been through it all, depression, anxiety, Hospitalised, medicated. I want to help any other mums out there suffering from this terrible depression. You are not alone and you will get better. I am now coming off medication and wanting to have another baby in the future. Please if you need anyone to talk to I am here.

Kaitlyn

White_Rose · ‎16-05-2015

Dear Kaitlyn

What a great and positive post. A warm welcome to Beyond Blue.

It is wonderful when people write in with their success stories. Congratulations on your recovery and I hope baby two will be all that you want.

May I suggest that you start another thread on either Supporting Family and Friends, Women, Depression or Grief Loss and Separation. These forums are all appropriate for your story and offer of support. Then when anyone responds to you their post will not get lost in all the new posts.

I'm very glad you have chosen to post here.

Regards

Mary

White_Rose · ‎16-05-2015

Dear StrongerP

Welcome and thanks for posting. If you read my reply to Mr Redline which is a few posts above yours, you will see the comments I made which are relevant to you. There are also more posts on the site so explore. You will find others in your position.

If you would like to start a thread of your own instead of joining in one of the other threads pleas decide the forum you want to post in and start a new thread.

Regards

Mary

life_hurts · ‎16-05-2015

26 yr old mother of 2 recently married partner of 9 years, full of regrets about getting married already.. i forgot how mean he can actually be.. he told me tonight im the reason for his drinking and when i go to defend myself he make strange noises so i just give up and go into my happy place in my mind. he is very unkind when he is angry and says horrible thing about and to me in front of our kids. i feel stupid for not leaving me but he would take our kids away from me and i would be in misery. i feel like i was pressured into marriage. i work harder than him and have a day off today and he was happy and fine, and i was gonna do some housework but he said "dont, just relax you work hard" then later proceeded to tell the kids how lazy i am. he ruins all my nice things and blames me for financial mistakes and everything. I know im stupid for staying but my kids are my world. i still feel like the only way out of it is suicide. but i cant do that to my babies, but im gonna be stuck in a sad marriage forever while they watch me get belittled.. and if i leave i know he will take them away from me. so i am just stuck. forever.

beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

WallPop · ‎16-05-2015

Hello there. Had some difficulty getting to this stage (?) and hoping I'm on the right track I'll introduce myself as WallPop. I have been treated for depression over the past 18 years. Initially cost my position in Public Service. I have had various medications and Doctors with varying degrees of success BUT the depression always returns. The medications work for a period, then plateau or create negative responses (anxiety or exaggerate the depression). Last year for a period of approx 6-7 mths I was successfully weaned off the medications however a financial upset saw the depression return. I had been on anitdepressantes at night. These were re-introduced last February however, although they had been reasonably successful, they now seemed to generate (one of or both(?)) anxiety, after four weeks. So weaned off them again for last 3-4 weeks but have been absolutely miserable, don't want to do anything and prefer to stay in bed although my mind seems clear enough I am very lethargic. I have over time become very wary of the medications and the doctors knowledge of a particular antidepressant and/or side effects. I am currently (again) seeing a Psychologist, underwent C.B.T. Years ago but have never been able to gain much at all from the Mindfulness??? Where do I go from here, confused and wary.

WallPop · ‎16-05-2015

This reply is to Chris B and his reply to Moreena. I'm a new boy on the block and just posted under the name WallPop. I am 61 y.o. And had trouble navigating to this or yoor Page and did not go through the steps you outlined to Moreena. Now I don't know if I'm correctly registered or posted.