Members new and old, introduce yourselves here

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone,

This is (what will hopefully become) a mega-thread for members, new and old, to introduce themselves.  I'll kick off:

My name is Chris Banks and I’m the online communities manager at beyondblue. Basically, I’m here to help out, contribute to discussions, and answer any questions you may have about beyondblue. I work with a team of moderators behind-the-scenes who keep the forums running 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

I’m 37, originally from New Zealand, and have worked as a filmmaker, journalist, and musician.  I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in the mental health sector too. I have lived experience of bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety, and have been living in Melbourne for nearly two years. In my spare time I enjoy movies, music, hanging out with mates, and I barrack for Hawthorn, much to the disgust of some of our regular members!

I’m not a psychologist or counsellor (although I have seen a fair few of them), so I can’t give medical advice. Like everyone else here, I can provide peer support only.
I really enjoy being part of the community and virtually meeting the many different people of all ages who come through everyday, even if they're not feeling the best when they arrive on the doorstep. Hopefully in your time here you'll feel less alone, and pick up some tips and encouragement for the journey.  

(passes on the talking stick)

PLEASE NOTE: This thread is for introductions only, if you have an issue you would like to discuss ongoing with the community, please start a new thread with your topic in the appropriate section.

[Mezevent]

Hi my name is Mary & I'm new here to BB. I found the site after I googled my medical condition which has now had long term affects on my physical health, daily life & state of mental health. So my story so far...i have been ill for 14 years now with an undiagnosed illness. Up until about 5 years ago I had suffered alone...its a very lonely depressed place to be! I had every endoscopy x3, every scan possible & tested for a multitude of different things, over & over, only to be dismissed by dr's, was told its all in my head & put in the too hard basket, not even the medical world could diagnose? I was then labelled a drug addict from the local hospital after several years of being admitted & still finding no answers...I was told I probably had chronic irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). But I knew that's not what I had. So it was by shear act of fate that a visiting Dr from Adelaide SA, would just happen to be in the ER this time & would hear my story! He had answers & an actual diagnosed medical Term/explanation of what the hell I had been suffering from for the last 8 years! Only he himself was on a mission to educate others in what he & his colleagues had discovered & now come to know as type of toxic poisoning from the THC in marrawhanna! Turns out I should b the 'poster girl' candidate for...the exact same condition he had discovered & was now traveling the east coast educating the medical world inn, giving talks about this newly discovered illness, I've come to know as 'Cannabinoid  Hypermermesis' a severe reaction to long term kronic marrawhanna use. This was not & still is not a widely know illness. Only affecting 1% of heavy users its (the THC) attaches to ur fat cells, attacks ur core temperature...causes severe cramps, spirratic vomiting & can last 10mins up to 10+ days. Only getting relieve from extremely hot showers or baths, and different pain medications has been used to help with the pain. I now take only pain medication which has helped after trying many different drugs. So now I'm able to do more during the day & even eat with out getting sick...sometimes! But it still continues to be a mental struggle on a daily basis, I'm unable to work a normal job & have trouble even going outside some days as I'm just so sick & tired with the same daily rituals of being sick my life revolves around my illness. Some days it's just too dang much so I am here looking for some support for the days I cant handle on my own!

[peter1977]

hello my names peter or call me pete . I am here because my partner suffers depression and i have spent the last 20 years trying to help her .

[Ana_kitty]

Hi everyone,

I had to read quite a few posts just to get the courage up to write anything at all. Call me Ana, and I guess I'm here cos I have depression and anxiety/panic attacks. I don't like to admit it, and to some people its something that just isn't serious enough to talk about. Immediate family members are the only ones aware of my situation, if my relatives found out, they would definitely look at me differently, which is quite sad. And yes, I am also in a place where I feel like people don't understand what I am going thru, but I must say, reading others' posts have certainly opened my mind and made me feel at ease somewhat.

I'm 34, been single for nearly 10 years due to work commitments, have 3 Russian blue cats, love cross stitching, being creative, love watching any movies known to man, and I love my exercise/gym.

I suppose this all started when things started falling to pieces at work nearly 3-4 years ago, I thought I loved my job, but it quickly went down hill, and all thanks to a couple of individuals who made my life a living nightmarish hell.

I have been seeing a professional since then, it was hard to admit to my mum that I thought I may need help, but, she encouraged me to seek help, and when my first appointment came around, it was just in the nick of time, I had a super bad day at work, and was ready to line my car up on the freeway straight at a nice big old gum tree. But, for some reason i stayed on the road. I know that was a few years ago now, and every day driving to and from work, I still see that tree, and think,... I truly am better than that, and I never want my parents to have to deal with "that".

Recently I have been dealing with constant chronic pain in my lower back due to a broken bone and bulging discs, I most certainly have had my low points, BUT, I always see that things are definitely improving, e.g, less pain, more exercise, tafe study (which means new career in the future) nearly completed, improvement in home life, and finding support in the most unlikeliest of places. (you would seriously be surprised)!

I have tried desperately to eliminate a lot of stress in my life, I really do feel a weight lifted, and I need to keep telling myself to just keep it going! Don't stop, never give up! Its hard... damn is it hard...

Depression, for me, is the hardest thing that I have had to deal with, and I'm a tough cookie.

I am hoping this approach may do me some good, talking to others..

Thank you for reading.

[fifty-50]

Hey all, I'm a 22 year old bloke from Sydney and can't really say I've had a rough life. I must say that I read a lot of your stories of hardship with a lot of sympathy. I myself have never endured anything quite dramatic and am surrounded by a lot of positive people. I feel quite blessed for what I have and do find a lot of beauty in the world and in people. 

But for whatever reason I have had some periods in my life where I have been filled with inexplicable self-hatred. I feel like I do have those periods most of the time, but sometimes it can be quite overwhelming. I would probably say I've got some mild form of depression, but the dominating aspect of my mental health is my incredibly defeatist attitude. The reason I thought I'd join these forums is actually because I find speaking to and helping others with their issues makes me feel better. I don't like talking about my own mental health... It's weird, but I just don't like burdening people with it. Whenever I have a spell of negativity, I actually find that helping someone with something (work, cooking, cleaning, talking about their own mental health) makes me feel better.

Anyways.. I look forward to chatting with you guys. Peace

[fearfulbear]

Hi everyone. I'm Claire and I'm 16 years old. I have been depressed for a few months. I'm not very sure what to write. I'm very very upset. No one knows how to help me. I cannot afford therapy and I'm very unsure about medication. I really want to be happy. Everyone is tired of seeing me sad and expresses frustration to me. But I try so hard and they just don't understand that it's all I am now. I feel so so so awful not only because of what I'm going through, but for all the shame I feel for being sad. 

[Alin]

Dear Claire. Your post resonated with me because I felt like that when I was 16 too. Please go see your GP, he or she can give you a mental health plan which will allow you to see psychologists for little to no money! Also, don't be scared of medication, I tried to do it myself without meds for many many years. Now that I am on them I am so glad. They saved my life.

[Blue_Butterfly]

Hey, I'm a 23 year old female and have had depression and anxiety for a few years now. After going onto anti-depressants and seeing a psychologist I made a life changing decision to become a psychologist myself so I can help other people the way I was helped. I am only in the beginning of my long journey to become a psychologist but if I can save just one person's life (whether it be literally stopping them from dying or simply inspiring them to turn their lives around for the better) all the study and past experiences will be worth it. I am a huge believer of everything happens for a reason and I would not change a thing about my past because it made me who and where I am today.

 I have a strong passion for helping people with depression and anxiety, in-particular when it is related to sex and relationships as this is what my experience was and I found it was so much harder to find someone to talk to as sex is such a taboo topic.

[19Kat85]

Hello all,

I'm a 30 year old female who has battled with depression, anxiety and eating disorders (anorexia and bulimia) since the age of 14. Mental health problems have plagued my family from as early as I can remember. My father took his own life when I was young, my mother has used men, alcohol and prescription drugs to get her through since.

We are an intelligent bunch- eloquent, aware, socially fabulous in our ability to chameleon our way in or out of most things... But I feel so empty, as if I've been broken up into a million little pieces and struggle often to reconstruct myself into a slither of a person. I've been in recovery for 2 years now. I seem to go in cycles of metaphorically high-fiving myself at my progress, other times I feel the weight of a lifetime of pain, shame and want to self destruct.

People in my life find it difficult to keep up, "What's going on now? Is she happy or sad?" And often they become overwhelmed or I intentionally overwhelm, ignore or push them out of my life. 

I decided I needed to take a step forward by being open with my loved ones, coming out of the closet, but I still find it difficult to say, "I feel broken today." It's a lonely place to be.

So here I am, on these forums because today is a lonely place.

[Mea20-08]

Hi I'm Mea,

I have suffered with depression and anxiety since I was eight and I was recently medicated up until I fell pregnant. I have now had the baby and was doing well. Its been 10 weeks and I'm starting to loose the early motherhood happiness and am feeling like I used to before medication. I want to continue breastfeeding so I am looking for alternative ways to help myself instead of medication.

[Workingtowardshappiness]

Hi I'm a guy in my 30s who has battled different addictions. I'm realizing they were to make me feel better and I've been depressed on and off for a long time. If anyone has similar experiences especially how to rebuild your life it would be great to hear from you.

Thanks