Lots of support and still struggling

[Puglett]

Hi all,

Nice to meet you 🙂

I suppose I am posting because I feel a little 'stuck' and have a feeling others might feel similar? I have quite a few mental health difficulties, for which I have LOTS of support (friends, GP, Psychologist), yet I still feel terrible and low most of the time.

I have been implementing learnt strategies, and they are helpful, though if I were to imagine a mountain where mental wellness was at the top, the strategies only take me up a single step as the difficulties have been happening for so long. I feel like it would take a minimum of 6 months for me to get anywhere near my level of mental wellbeing that I had 2 years ago.

Alongside mental health challenges, loss/grief and sickness have also likely impacted my mood.

I know my friends are always there to listen, but it really doesn't feel like enough or like life is worthwhile. I am safe for now, I have a safety plan, but I am struggling to drag myself through the days - there are only a few things that keep me going.

Thanks for reading, I look forward to talking to you all x 

[Bob_22]

Hello Puglett,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for posting your story! I'm sorry to read that you've been struggling recently and that each day takes an effort to get through. You've done great to reach out here and I hope you can find some support on the forums.

As you mentioned, the journey to wellness can be a very difficult one and takes a long time. Often we can also feel like we are taking one step forward and two steps back. When I had a relapse in my Major Depressive Disorder back in 2019, it took me two years to get back to what I would consider functioning. This was through a combination of medication, psychology and ECT. I'm not saying this is how long it will take you but it's important to acknowledge your victories and that you are moving (albeit it slowly) toward something greater. Sometimes a little patience and hope can go a long way. May I ask what type of strategies you are implementing at the moment? 

I'm sorry that you've also been dealing with grief recently as well. That can certainly impact our mood and overall mental health progress. The key, I found, was to be patient and open to any feelings or thoughts that might emerge. Of course, it was a big help to be able to bounce my feelings off my psychologist and psychiatrist. I can also recommend Griefline who supports anyone experiencing grief, facing any type of loss, providing access to free telephone and online support services and resources.

It can really help having someone to talk to when negative thoughts arise and I can recommend contacting the Beyond Blue counselling team in such instance. By engaging via phone or chat the counsellors can provide advice and support 24/7, please contact either via phone 1300 22 4636 or web chat. Alternatively, I would also like to suggest Lifeline on 13 11 14.

Please update us on how you are going and thank you again for reaching out here. Please remember you're not alone in what you're facing and that the best is yet to come. 💙

Bob

[Puglett]

Thanks Bob, I appreciate your response and knowing that I'm not the only one who feels like it is such a long journey! It's so hard because you know the people around you would love to hear that you are going well but it's not a quick fix unfortunately. 

In terms of strategies, the most helpful ones have been:

- Challenging my negative thoughts and exposing myself gradually through a hierarchy to situations that make me anxious.

- Taking the initiative to plan activities with friends to lift my mood.

Also a big thing for me is being accountable to people like my Psychologist so that I actually am doing these things, and only expecting myself to make a few changes at the time.

[Petal22]

Hi Puglett,

Im sorry you are feeling this way but please hang in there and keep persevering.

Strategies  and skills can take time to learn and then even more time to master but you just need to keep persevering because you WILL master them.

My condition felt like a marathon to get through but eventually I mastered it after alot of hard work.

I understand the days can seem very long at times when we are in the thick of our conditions but once you get a grip on your strategies and skills the good days will out weigh the bad ones.

Keep going, one day you will get to the top of your mountain and the view is amazing.

[ecomama]

Hey Puglett, welcome to the forums. Sorry you feel low but I'm glad you have plenty of support! 

Sounds like you have had and still have a lot to deal with. Just considering the loss and grief recovery, I think 6 months is a drop in the bucket! Recovering from grief is not a "click of the fingers" and we're 'back to normal', it's more something we learn to live with, feel sad, do self care, cry, feel a little better and then one day we notice how far we've come. 
Grief may not leave us entirely and having an expectation that it should, is being very hard on yourself. 

Throwing all the other things on the pile, like physical health issues and mental health issues, well it's a lot. 

It's really worth our mental health to think of one day at a time (one moment at a time some days), plan things to look forward to and practice self care intentionally. 

Look forward to hearing how you're going
Love EM

[Bob_22]

Hi Puglett, thanks for your reply. 🙂 

Yes, as you mentioned it isn't always a quick journey and can be frustrating when those around you expect it to be! In those situations I found it difficult to always be putting on a brave face and learned to accept that its okay to be truthful/vulnerable (even if some people accept that). Otherwise it is draining mentally/emotionally and also a risk factor for your mental health. 

Thought challenging and socialising are great strategies. These are two things I value very highly. I get a lot out of thought challenging and has helped me with my anxiety in particular quite a lot. It's difficult to learn but very helpful once you become used to it. It's also great to hear that you are open with your psychologist and active with your treatment plan. My doctor always tells me that it is one of biggest predictors for recovery. 

Please continue to share your story and any valuable tips you learn along the way. You sound like a strong and resilient individual with a tonne to offer. Again, thank you for reaching out here and I hope you are finding the forums helpful. 

Bob

[Mark Z.]

Hi Puglett,

Welcome to the forum.

I'm so sorry for your challenge, but also happy to hear that you have lots of support.

I think you're on the right track, have the right strategies (as you said they are helpful). I think you shouldn't think too much about 'climbing the to the mountain top', instead, you should think from another angle - every step, every process, big or small, is leading you to a better life, comparing with the lowest point, and it's worth to celebrate. We all have mental challenges, more or less, nobody is at 'the top of the mountains', nobody can eliminate them. 

Mark