Hi I'm New.

[Blitzen]

Just sayin' hi cos it seems the thing us newbs do first. Had agoraphobia for 15 years p.a and anxiety. I just had a baby... Been a rough 5 years. Was coping pretty well considering all. Thanks for hearin me.

[blondguy]

Hello Blitzen

Welcome to the forums and good on you for posting too!

I used to have agoraphobia in my 20's and it was an bad place to be...I understand your pain there. I see my GP every 4 weeks for my depression and he is a legend. Have you had any luck with a good doc for your anxiety?

Congratulations on the birth of your new baby 🙂

There are many gentle people that can be here for you Blitzen. Some mums around too that have been going through some rough patches as well. The forums are a safe place for you to post and no one will judge you here

Thanks heaps for posting

my kind thoughts

Paul

[Blitzen]

Thanks Paul.

It seems like no matter what I do to get rid of anxiety it wont go.

My problems are a lot. I feel like many doctors have given up on me. (In fact 1 cancelled our sessions as they thought I was not well enough to continue - Which left me feeling indescribably sad and hopeless.

My 2 best friends (My Supports) Passed away last year from 2 separate accidents.

I am happy to have had my baby after just finding out I have a small benign brain tumour. Which ironically was supposed to make it very hard to have a baby. 10 weeks after having the sweet one I find myself having terrible thoughts.

I feel trapped. literally. I live in the hills I have dogs (1 makes life very difficult). My partner is taking care of me by making food and cleaning. But my house is not in order. I have lost all motivation.

I am part of a group but have not attended in a while. I don't feel like I am worthy.

My (Deceased) best friends Mum drops in now and then. It is nice to know I'm not completely alone.

I have been thinking of the future. I don't know how I can do it.

On top of all this I have TN. Which is a very bad pain and I am sick of taking pain meds. I am sick of a lot.

This last week I have been thinking very bad thoughts. I don't know if they are something or I am just feeling low.

Sorry this is so scrambled there is so much going on. I feel like I am suffocating.

Regards, Blitz

[Evilnut]

Hi blitzen please to meet you I really enjoy meeting new people how have pride to want a better life. You are a true champion for reaching out for help and sharing your story you are help others that just read your posts. Now I am evilnut or Wayne I can here for a place to start my recovery feeling hopelessly lost for Many years I have read lots of post I found so solice in knowing I was no alone real people do have challenges like me hope we can chat latter I look forward to it.

Cheers evilnut

[Blitzen]

Thanks Wayne. I am feeling not so down just knowing there are people who will talk. Thank you very much.

Blitz

[CMF]

Hi Blitz and welcome,

I am so sorry for what you are going through but glad you have reached out here. Congratulations on your little one too! You are in a safe and gentle environment here as you can see from the responses you already have. Not sure if you are receiving counseling or not, you did mention doctors.

I hope to hear more from you and wish you the best.

cmf

[blondguy]

Hey Blitz

That is so very sad that your 2 best friends (support network) have both passed...I have no words for the pain you must be going through Blitz....ugh

I see that Wayne and CMF have rallied to help you above which is a bonus as they are both super supportive people sharing their own experiences on the forums to assist others

The motivation will come back Blitz. I was a dill and never took counseling seriously in my 20's. The more frequent the counseling the better you recovery will be.

You have a super kind partner (please let him know that he is a legend) and 2 dogs too 🙂

I have been actively involved in dog rescue here in Southern Vic for years. I have a German Shep x Chow Chow that is approx 60 kilo's.....yes a horse lol. What breed of dogs do you have?

You are not alone Blitz...even though the forums are not an IM format...we are here for you

my kindest

Paul

[Blitzen]

Thanks Paul. Yes they were my support. Not a day passes I don't think of them and wish they were here. They both left in a very tragic and really random accidents.

I am still not sleeping well 25 mins her n there.

Thanks about my lil one. She is doing just fine. I just worry about all the terriblethings I went through as a misguided kid. Bullying, Leaving school at 15, Feeling low and lonely a lot. I don't want this for her. The whole thing makes me very nervous.

I have 2 Elkhounds. They try very hard to keep me comfortable. Bless them.

PS. My partner would like to know he is doing well. He is working overtime to help me.

Peace, Blitzen.

[Blitzen]

Hi CMF.

I am reluctantly going to a psychologist and psychiatrist. I just don't want to talk in case of saying something wrong. I feel trapped and I don't know what to say. They keep suggesting inpatient. This scares me and I want to to run. Stuck with these thoughts. It's getting to me a lot now.

Regards,

Blitz

[blondguy]

Hey Blitz

Thanks for posting back! Im sorry that you are doing it hard. Having 2 beautiful Elkhounds would be calming

Your partner is a legend for his solid support and TLC...Doing overtime to help is a selfless and super kind gesture

Feeling reluctant to see your counselors is sad as they have your best interests at heart. The psychiatrist usually thinks from the 'medication' side of our health and the psychologist helps with our coping skills

You know I have had chronic anxiety for 13 years in the 1980-1990's and it was horrible so I do understand where you are coming from. Anxiety severity does decrease over time with super regular therapy. If we dont tell them everything thats on our mind then their ability to heal us is limited unfortunately.

Only if its okay....why did your doc mention 'inpatient'? ....just so I can try to be of more help Blitz. No one can force you to be an inpatient unless you give them your permission.

Great to have you as part of the forum family too Blitz 🙂

my kind thoughts for you and your legend partner!

Paul