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Continuing Moving Forward at a Snails Pace 🐌

Still_at_it
Community Member

Hello All, I'm new here, rather nervous, and cautious. Don't know what to say in my introduction without feeling foolish. I had read interesting things, sad things too. I'm an older person well up in years yet always have a young at heart outlook in life. I suffer PTST, anxiety and depression for almost 50 years. Am on meds, have professional counselling, so on. I'm on these forums as I'm a great believer that we all can learn from each other: older, oldies and elderlies can learn much from the younger generation and visa vversa. Just saying "Hello" to All

13 Replies 13

Just say Hello to All and hope you're taking care of yourselves.. Take care.

Today I feel absolutely lousy had an enjoyable time yesterday, today it's three opposite. Always so.oow low, depressed and struggle so much to stay o yht optimistic side of things. Have no idea why I fluctuate like a roller-coaster great one, the next so horrible.

Every day I feel like this and really loathe the way I am. Looks like a lovely day out there but can't seem to get out of bed or be motivated to do anything at all. Just made a nice cup of tea that's about all the energy I've In me and went back to bed propped up with pillows looking out of window. Have no helper as I've read on some posts so need to do everything myself. Getting so weary of trying to figure things out. Need to have my mental factualies intact so can function daily without someone trying to manipulate or control me. I've had to many control freaks in my life and no longer want to be controlled by anyone. It gets tiring to stay of top of things. Have no intentions of going into a retirement village. They're not all as good as they advertising agents claim. I had dealt with them when my very elderly mother used to live in them before she went into high care nursing home. I've dealt with too many people who's full of promises to take good care for elderly ones only to find out later it's all talk. All those big places want to do is control the vulnerable elderly. After experiencing that with very dear elderly mother, it had completely turned me off by looking at any type of retirement places. Basically most are the same, lots of broken promises. I enjoy going outside when able and still able to see some trees and hearing the birds without living on top of each other. I don't wish to live in a pigeon box with no windows, no privacy, with strict rules of do,s and don'ts .

It's a worrisome thing for me, too, becoming dependant on helpers, or thinking of what to do if for any reason living on my own becomes too unmanageable. I'm not at all sure I could have more people around more often - even if I could take a place in a retirement village. (Don't have that much money). & recent reports about conditions in residential care are so frightening. Even the thought of who to trust with my care & finances, should I become unable to make reasonable decisions - I have no-one, but my sis, perhaps... but I woldn't want to burden her with caring for me. She had some years of difficulty with our father.

I'm struggling to not crawl away into my bed, too. Dealing with decisions I need to make, old memories & emotions coming in at me, my physical health being so much trouble lately, too, & I am so tired. Maybe it's a good thing that I'm not often so physically comfortable in my bed, because I then get up, each time for an hour or so, before feeling it is too much to be up, too, & go back

Having the routine things we muct do each day, gives us a reason to get up. Don't like it, but I need such things. I don't know anything much to encourage you right now... just I'm glad you are up enough to write a post, & I'm up now to write to you.

&, by the way, I tend to write over the character count, too. What sort of thing do you write?

I think I may be doing some more poetry writing later. Too tired now.

Warmest regards, 😸

mmMekitty