Anxiety?

[Holly18]

I am 17 years old in year 12. All my life I've been quite a shy kid, I'm very introverted as well. For a couple years now though, since around year 9 (2016) I have had these feelings that I'm unsure of as to call them anxiety or not. I often feel as though people are judging me or making fun of me. Whether I am at school, a shopping centre, a restaurant or even work, I feel like people are watching me and I seem to be on guard at all times in public. I also worry about a lot of things, most things even if they are weeks away e.g. a family BBQ. I worry a lot about being on time to things like work, school and social events. For example just the other week I slept through my alarm and when I woke up and realised I burst into my parents room freaking out about being late to school and when they tried to tell me it didn't matter and I'd get there on time and my peers wouldn't judge me if I was late, I became a bit irritable and a bit snappy. I later felt embarrassed about the way I had reacted (I did arrive on time to school). Before I have a conversation with someone I will often rehearse what I am going to say and after conversations I sometimes dwell on what I have said and what the person I was talking to probably thought of my comment. I often worry about going into shops such as when I have to go to get dinner by myself from a takeaway shop or something, I'm not 100% sure what it is that worries me about this but I try my best to avoid having to do it. Sometimes before social events such as dinners or sleepovers or parties I get stomach pains and feel sick. I don't think I've ever had a panic attack and I don't suffer from depression and have never ever had any suicidal thoughts. I don't know if this is me overreacting, but I'm sick of working about people judging me even though I know they most likely aren't.

[Rabbit33]

Holly!!!!
I can tell you right now that i am exactly the same way! I do the same things, i worry about the same things, i'm constantly making sure that i'm prepared for whats ahead in the week. I feel anxious if out by myself that others are judging or looking and like to stick to my strict routine because i know it's safe and that i've planned for it. It becomes comfortable.
I'm no doctor nor do i have any medical degree but I have been diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder. Now , i'm not saying that you have that, but it may be worth having a chat with your GP and describing these feelings and sensations you're having, just like you have now and maybe seeing if her can refer you to a psychologist for therapy? CBT and other therapy approach frameworks are great at dealing with this and provide coping strategies.
On a positive note, there are some strengths in this situation. It shows that you are punctual, reliable, organised and most likely quick to acquire leadership qualities. So don't necessarily look at it as a bad thing.

Let me know how you go? and if you wanna chat, i'll keep an eye on this post and return to it.

🙂