SSRI Medication & your experience

[Happygoluckymiss]

Hi all,

i went to my fabulous gp today to discuss my mental health.

I’ve had troubles sleeping & increasingly bad panic attacks. They’ve been very bad of late.

We had a very frank discussion about possibly trying an SSRI to help manage the anxiety and sleeping issue (insomnia- 2 years).

i am apprehensive about starting an anti-depressant as I know how sensitive I am to medications & I honestly do not have it in me right now to mange the side effects (the last 2 months have been very difficult). We compromised and devised a plan of attack which I will trial & reflect on & if no improvement then look at SSRIs.

I am just looking to this wonderful & supportive community to see how you went on SSRIs & if they are really helpful? What does it feel like?

i know everyone is different & I am not asking for medical advice regarding the medication, merely your experience with them.

I value & respect all opinions.

- happygoluckymiss

[Happygoluckymiss]

Hello Anxious1,

Thank you for sharing your story and experience with SSRIs. This has helped enormously.

I took the medication for sleeping last night and i actually slept the whole night - which was amazing and i felt good. A lot better after a good nights sleep. I want to trial this for a month (as per my plan with the GP) and then reassess.

At the moment, as the last couple of months have been very difficult emotionally, mentally, physically... I just do not have the bandwidth to manage the potential side effects. I feel i need to be a bit more resilient when and if I make the decision to start taking them.

Thank you so much for sharing and I really appreciate this, beyond words.

- happygoluckymiss

[Happygoluckymiss]

Hi Geoff,

Thank you for sharing your experience and how they work for you. It means a lot and it is truly comforting and helpful, so a BIG thank you!!

My anxiety - well i guess i better start at the beginning...

In Oct 2018 I found out i was pregnant, the father was not too impressed

In December 2018, I went for a termination - after three attempts and terminated the baby

In January 2019, we essentially called it quits (infidelity, hurtful words and actions - nothing physical to constitute abuse - I am making this very clear).

I am not ready to end the relationship - he is not either and I hope we can resolve this.

I am comfortable with my decision to terminate the baby, the silver lining was i thought i could not have a baby and well it turns out that I can. Which I am very thankful for.

Prior to this relationship I was in a relationship with my husband, together ten years in total and of those ten married just shy of 3. He was a wonderful man at the beginning and then because of what i believe to be MH and drug dependency the relationship became toxic, co-dependent and I guess I was the enabler to this. There was emotional, financial and physical abuse - which was never reported as when i was in it I made a number of excuses to 'just make it ok and better.'

The panic stems from all these factors i believe and has reared it head, understandably, over the the last little while.

I am a strong, mostly resilient person who can make it through anything and i think the attacks and anxiety are a build up of everything that has occurred.

Wow! Do you know how good that felt to get that out! Thank you Geoff!

- happygoluckymiss

[geoff]

Hello Happygoluckymiss, you know it's always a great relief for us to know that finally, you can explain what has happened to people you feel comfortable with, so I must thank you, not only does that courage but also enormous strength.

The three attempts must have been heartbreaking and would have certainly increased any anxiety you were suffering from, but to finally know you are able to conceive must be so exciting for you.

These feelings from all of this won't go away unless you can get the support you need, and please remember, that it doesn't matter how strong you are, there can always be a soft spot and that's where any type of depression including anxiety starts to creep in.

I now appreciate your thread title so let's keep helping you and thank you once again for opening up to us.

Please if you can reply back that would be lovely.

Take care.

Geoff.

[Happygoluckymiss]

Thank you Geoff - it was a big relief and yes a form of therapy.

Ive had two good nights sleep aided by medication which numbs the brain at night. This has been very helpful and in relation to the topic I will reassess after a few more good nights sleep. I had a mild attack this morning but nothing compared to the others as I practiced mindfulness and breathing and nipped it in the bud! I’m proud of this and know that as I slept it helped overcome it .

day by day I know I am becoming stronger and healthier. I’m thankful for this.

Thank you for your kind words, they mean a lot

- happygoluckymiss

[smallwolf]

Hi Happy,

Might share my story with you if that is OK... I am onto my 3rd (different medication) after changing dosage level in the first and second ones. In each case when I would report the effect I had for each one/level to my psychiatrist to in order to find which one/level is best for me. The first one made me forgetful, but did nothing for anxiety etc. I felt the effect of the second one plateaued but did nothing for anxiety. The one I am currently works on the anxiety quite well, but I can still have down days.

I was also given (read prescribed) medication to help sleep through the night. Its also helped to empty the mind before going to sleep. I dont need this medication now.

Top points to you also for using your tools to overcome your panic attack.

Tim

[Happygoluckymiss]

Hi Tim!

Thank you for sharing your experience, it is appreciated & valued.

I actually have taken the next step and seeing a psychologist tomorrow to start the process of confronting my fear about talking about my feelings, mental health and anxiety.

This is part of my action plan with my GP so I am taking the required and necessary steps - which I am proud of.

With respect to sleeping two nights of good sleep aided with prescribed medication has worked wonders and my CEO even said you’re awfully chirpy today - so I believe this is working. Tonight is night 3 of the medication and I don’t feel drowsy after or foggy - so this is a positive.

I had a big set back today personally and through the techniques I have learnt, I had what I would deem a very minor anxiety attack.

I want to thank you again for your encouragement, support & sharing your experience.

- happygoluckymiss

[blondguy]

Hi Happygoluckymiss!

It is refreshing to read your posts especially with your strong sense of determination to heal too

I didnt know you have been through what you have Happy 😞 Kudos for having the inner strength to post about the bad place you have been in. That took some serious strength to post.....I am so sorry for what you have been through Happy.....and then some....Its difficult for me to find the words...

Before I get bogged down in my reply....Your health and well being is paramount....All other considerations are secondary.....

just a note if thats okay....The SSRI's reduced my anxiety by approx 80%.....which was wonderful. My sleep was still ordinary so my GP prescribed me a small dose of a benzo so I could have a quality deep sleep...and my quality of life improved vastly.....relationships....career performance...and there was no more exhaustion through having poor quality sleep

you are amazing Happygoluckymiss....Thankyou again for your input on the forums too 🙂

my kindest

Paul

[White_Rose]

Hello Happy

Congratulations on taking the next step forward. It can be daunting to go to your first meeting with a psychologist but you have shown us how determined you are to heal so I have no doubts this appointment will contribute to that process.

Isn't it amazing how much difference a good night's sleep will make. I guess most people, if not everyone, has had a few sleepless nights. When we then get back to sleeping well it makes such a difference. I am pleased for you for your good night's sleep and hope that last night was the same. Sleeplessness features in many of our mental illnesses which means getting back to a good rest overnight is imperative (and often difficult).

It is sad when we have one of 'those' days especially if we have been making good progress. Being human has its downside at times which is unfortunate. Being human also has its good points as we learn to manage the down time and grow from it. Not the most favoured way of learning especially at the time but it can have amazing pay-offs when we stick with it. Even having something 'normal' like the 'flu can affect our mental health so the more resilient we become the easier it is to get back to the good place.

Will you let us know how today went? Nothing you do not want to disclose of course but we are interested in how everything went in general.

Mary

[Happygoluckymiss]

Thank you Mary and your kind words and encouragement are very valued and appreciated.

It really is comforting when someone responds and replies, it really is a beautiful community of very caring people. Thank you.

Last night was ok - I did wake up and watch a bit of tv so sleep was interrupted but my mind was not buzzing and there was no anxiety or an uneasy feeling. So, I will take this as a positive.

I mentioned in another post that I have a presentation to give today for 100+ people today and I am not even slightly nervous or indeed anxious over this - it’s funny how our minds work.

I have my appointment today via phone with a qualified psychologist and thought I would start small as from the reading I’ve done - starting small is the best way forward.

I am committed to overcoming period in my life and a few days of discomfort and hurt now I know will pay huge dividends in the future. By leaving this untreated and trying to do it on my own - I know will be far more detrimental and I am not going to allow myself to be in this position. I am committed to this and know that through hard work and determination- I will heal and I will learn strategies to combat the down days a bit better.

Thank you Mary for your kind words

- happygoluckymiss

[geoff]

Hi Happy, minor attacks are always going to happen, it's how you have learnt on how to cope with them, stopping them to become a major attack.

I do realise that they can happen but in the process, you learn from each one of them, sometimes it may not make it any easier, but you gradually gain the strength you need.

Well done.

Geoff.