Possible ADHD

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Recent conversations with my counsellor, family, friends and partner have shed a different light on a whole bunch of things that have been normal for me for as long as I can remember. Like most people, when I heard about ADHD, it was usually about little boys bouncing all over the place. If you're not specifically looking, it's not at all clear it's something experienced by girls and adults of both sexes as well, and the symptoms are surprising. My sister has recently discovered she has it. It runs in families, but that's only one box checked.

Mind running constantly, like two or more radio stations blaring all the time. Check! Constantly getting distracted and bouncing from task to task to task, forgetting each as a new one (or one I started earlier) presents itself. Check! Insanely lengthy (and plentiful) to-do lists everywhere, reminders and alarms - and still forgetting important things (like meds) regularly. Check!

There's a lot more, but that's the gist. I have a referral to a psychiatrist in hopes of diagnosis (or ruling it out, but somehow I don't think so) - and I'll be stewing on it at least 3 months, as the dude's booked up until June. I'd like to hear from anyone who has been diagnosed, about the journey there. I'm somewhat concerned about being taken seriously and listened to, as everything I'm reading suggests even professionals are often poorly educated about ADHD and an adult has an uphill battle getting a diagnosis for this - a female adult all the more so. I'm writing down every example I can think of, of symptomatic behaviour (so many notes!), and could do with an idea of what sort of questions they will ask - a lot of what I'm reading suggests adults and women present very differently to little boys, but the little boy symptoms are often what they base diagnostic criteria on. Sounds like a problem area right there.

I'd also like to hear about symptom-related experiences, coping strategies and therapies that have helped people here. I've already read a few good tips, like having someone around to keep you "on task" when possible to get things done around the house, regularly tweaking routines to keep boredom from undermining attention to important things, aiming to achieve something small early in the day to break the sense of getting nowhere for the day ahead (boy that's a big one for me, I struggle when I don't do that).

I could waffle on for ages (following that daisy-chain of runaway thoughts), but I'll stop there for now.

Blue.

[eight]

hi. i'm adhd combined type and i was diagnosed abt seven years ago. i recently got it reaffirmed in december and have been starting medication for it as of last week. adhd runs heavily in my family - my father was born in the 60s and thinks of it as bad manners so lol he's never been diagnosed but all of his three kids have adhd. again has never bothered to get himself or his children diagnosed as he believes adhd can be remediated through Manners so its mostly fallen on me and my neurotypical mother when navigating it.

i cannot really recollect how much i got originally diagnosed but due to issues going on in my personal life i needed to get my diagnosis reaffirmed in late 2020 so i could start on the path of medication and getting social security. i got this through going to a private neuropsychiartry (adhd diagnosis is INSANE holy hell. its either wait months and months on this list or manage to shell out over a thousand dollars which i was able to do but not everyone can. no bloody wonder so many people resort to self-diagnosis when the path to professional diagnosis is full of blockades and so so many steep fees) mine was still heavily focused around childhood at the beginning - im very sorry i cant help you if you don't have access to records of your early childhood since the dsm-5 focuses a lot on ages 4-12, because everyone knows there are no neurodivergent people above age 18. it was only in the latter half the diagnostic process shifted onto me - there'd be notetaking over how i acted or spoke or moved while i would be taking tests or solving puzzles that'd test my patience, compulsions, organisation. also quizzes. lots and lots of quizzes that go on forever and ask the same questions over and over again but the wording is slightly different so you have to give a unique answer every time. this isn't even an adhd thing my nt mum had to do them too and feels the same. i got the word that my diagnosis was reaffirmed and my report was finished about 2 months after this happened. usually a good neuropsych will include suggestions on where to go next and what to do.

it's late very late but when it's not i'll try digging out my recent report to give more details on the diagnostic process and talk to you about strategies

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Hi Eight,

Thanks for your reply. I hear you about older family members not seeking help/diagnosis for various mental illnesses. There are obvious problems right through my family - the diagnosed ones including depression, anxiety, PTSD, ASD and ADHD. Those of us who know our problems can see the family link going back a generation or two, but attitudes to mental health were different in those generations and they often go undiagnosed, untreated and just not acknowledged.

You mentioned neuropsychiatry and a lot of puzzles and quizzes and things. Did that involve MRI or similar, observing what parts of your brain were activating? If so, I can understand the sheer cost. I don't think my sister had anything like that in her diagnosis. The big difference between her and I is that she has been seeing the same psychiatrist for something like 20 years and he has a lot to draw from. Me, I have seen psychologists for various reasons (for all the good it's done), but never a psychiatrist, and not for ADHD as it's only now come to light that I may have it.

You said "everyone knows there are no neurodivergent people above age 18". Yeah, that's the attitude I'm worried about. If you don't mind me asking, what age range are you in? It's possible if you're a young adult the childhood symptoms are more recent and therefore more relevant. I am now in my 40s, looking back on so much through my adult life that makes sense only now in context of ADHD - why simple tasks take so long, why I can't stay on track for literally 30 seconds most of the time, why I can get heaps done in a day, but rarely the things I set out to do and the things I really needed to get done. Why I can't seem to get on top of punctuality even to events I really want to go to, or I'm in a mad scramble at the last second. As for my childhood, it wasn't a great one, and my memory is a bit rubbish, so I've forgotten half, blocked out much of the rest. That's gonna be a problem, I'm sure.

I've spent years trying to cope with how I am with piles of to-do lists, reminders, alarms and Post-its all over the place. I still forget stuff regularly and get really overwhelmed with the to-dos and reminders as I need them for so many really basic things. Taking medications is a real joy. Anything I can't keep in the bedside drawer or the car gets forgotten as often as not because those are the times I'm semi-idle and little stuff like "Hm, did I take my meds?" pops into my head. It's a nightmare!

Blue.

[eight]

i also haven't seen a lot of professionals and the diagnosis was the first time i interacted with my neuropsychiatrist. i didnt get a mri. some of the puzzles i can remember is towers of hanoi, maths questions (this might differ on your mathematical ability. i notified my neuropsych before testing that i had a math delay so i was taking like, stage 4 questions), testing your ability to retell stories (one involved me being given a wordless picture book and cartoons and explaining what was happening, another one the neuropsych would read me a passage about the invention of the hot air balloon and i'd have to relay it back to her) one where i'd have to trace a geometrical figure several times over (that one tested my organisational skills. i focused more on the patterns i saw inside it but apparently the more organised way is to trace the most salient outside figures first before details). one test from hell i remember was this computer program that instructed you to hit the space bar whenever you saw a letter that WASN'T an x that went on for 13 minutes. its a test specifically designed to make you bored and make you sustain patience which i think should be categorised as violating the geneva conventions to do to a person with adhd its literally noted in the report how much i complained and wanted it to end while i was doing it. i have a friend who wants to be diagnosed with autism and adhd but as a poor adult woman... yeah nah, and i was looking up that test (Connors CPT) to see the price and i almost fell out my chair when i found the kits were $2-3k. it was such a simple program! cannot rationalise that price!

im a mid-teen and my father's youngest child. my siblings are two and 12 years older than me respectively but my eldest brother has a different birthmother. it does sound like a problem - ive seen stories of people being handed symptoms list with "argues with adults" on them from people who Specialise in adult adhd.

my bedside table is packed with medication and chargers and personal hygiene stuff because if i can grab them from my bed i probably won't use deodorant or keep my laptop charged. i'm a phone addict who finds using reminders best but they're not good for long-term things. i can remind myself i need to take a detour when i'm going home but i cant really schedule . and YEAH i've sat in so many traffic jams and realised "ah i didn't take my antidepressant this morning"

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Hi Eight,

Thanks for the run-down of tests. They do sound a tad tedious. Couldn't help but chuckle at your remark on the one "violating the Geneva convention". I appreciate your sense of humour. Sounds like your friend has a long and frustrating road ahead of her, to get a diagnosis for her ills. I don't think it's impossible, just not fun (and sustaining the level of effort to get through the institutional BS along the way, oh boy!).

Ah, okay. Well, let me say your ability to communicate noticeably outstrips that of most people in your age group. As did mine, back in the day. Wonder if that signifies anything. Anyway, your age seems like a significant factor in why they would focus heavily on your childhood symptoms - they're still within living memory, for starters! I'm not sure whether to be amused or mortified about the "argues with adults" thing coming from adult ADHD "specialists". I mean, I do argue with adults. Including myself, sometimes, haha.

Snap! My bedside table/drawers are the same. Same re remembering meds whilst sitting in traffic. The ADs, when I was taking them, could at least be kept in the car, I'd take them while waiting at the lights. It'sy asthma preventer I have trouble with - got to rinse my mouth after using the puffer, so can do it on the fly whenever I remember. Really hit and miss taking that one, even with reminders. I agree that scheduling with reminders is a nightmare. It's the closest I can get to getting it right at this point, but it isn't good - they go off all at once, or when I'm busy with something, and the message just gets lost on me. Post-it notes half work, when they're new. After a while they sink into the visual clutter and I still forget the things. Aargh! But you know what that's like, I'm sure.

Blue.

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Let's try that sentence again. It sucks typing long messages on a phone, getting thwarted by auto-correct (aka Hal): It's my asthma preventer I have trouble with - got to rinse my mouth after using the puffer, so can't do it on the fly whenever I remember.

[velvetfaerie]

Hi guys,

Thanks for the info you have put down here. As I was reading, I was nodding my head and smiling in familiarity. I am waiting to hear from the psychiatrist I got referred to. I believe the GP and psych I saw WELL over a decade ago didn't listen to me and got it wrong. My mother and partner agree that they got it wrong.

🙂

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Hi Velvetfaerie,

No problem, glad you find the information helpful. Hope you're not left waiting too long by the psychiatrist. Me, still a couple of weeks until my appointment, and I booked it when I started this thread. Real cute.

Sorry to hear you had that experience with the GP and psych. Unfortunately it's still a very common thing that they don't listen and don't take people seriously regarding mental health, as though somehow we don't know our own bodies, minds and lives. Ten or more years ago, that was even more prevalent, and conditions like ADHD were barely known about - not that they're especially well understood in the medical community even now. We may have a bit of a journey ahead of us. Fingers crossed for us both.

Blue.

[velvetfaerie]

Ah it happens. I said to them I am happy to wait a few months if necessary as I have made it this far so....... what's a few more months!

*crosses fingers*

[Clues_Of_Blue]

You're more patient than I. I was seriously unimpressed at the waiting list when I got my appointment. Mine is now looming soon, got to get all my notes together, symptom lists to back up my assertion, etc.